Tinder first date, end up at my place, everything's going fine, she smokes weed daily and asked to smoke from my bong, next thing you know she's vomiting and shitting on my couch...

RedSkeller · 2019-05-18T18:25:23+00:00

You guys never learn.

I paid for the drinks at the bar, the uber to my place and for her to get home, gave her some clothes, and she ruined my couch. In the morning she's blocked me from everything.

Consider it an expensive lesson learned and a hilarious tinder story.

She's living at home with her parents now

Picked a real winner here. Probably not her first couch she shit on.

Babyoil707 · 2019-05-18T17:43:44+00:00

LMAO this has to be bullshit

Kabuki431 · 2019-05-18T18:13:26+00:00

Lol u trust women from tinder ? Dude women dont trust themselves.

makinator9001 · 2019-05-18T17:53:05+00:00

You throw the couch buy a new one and learn the lesson. Lol

Daddy3asy · 2019-05-18T18:09:00+00:00

One time, I met up with girl for first time. She bragged about how much she smoked, so I took her to my drug dealing felon neighbors house, we had a smoke out. She rips 4 ft bong once, and barfs, all over dealers white couch, and then asks to lay down at my house. She sleeps for 14 hours and wakes up and leaves without saying a word. I bought neighbor a new couch to keep the peace.

TheBleachedTshirt · 2019-05-18T18:17:07+00:00

Help I had a bad experience with a low value woman, what do I do here?

dark_rabbit · 2019-05-18T19:31:54+00:00

Why is this on TRP?

herrazki · 2019-05-18T18:30:45+00:00

you paid for the uber + the drinks, sorry to say that you deserve it man !! lol do you even TRP ?

Irtotallynotrobot · 2019-05-18T19:14:22+00:00

Post her picture on social media and caption the synopsis, make her a meme to save couches everywhere.

Cholo4Trump · 2019-05-18T19:06:41+00:00

Ok i might get flak for this but like.. i dont think she purposely meant to vomit and shit on your couch. Lets just be honest now. Its not in her best interest.

Cut your losses. She can get mad and claim rape over being embarrased. By bringing her parents into this, she will feel that you are telling them shes a hoe and this will make her hamster bad things against u

its a lose-lose situation

MentORPHEUS · 2019-05-18T22:05:51+00:00

You're not going to collect anything from this woman, so just chalk it up to wild experience, (figuratively) cleanse the couch with fire and buy a new one, and move on with life.

FiveStarTendieDinner · 2019-05-18T18:02:27+00:00

Delete Tinder and neck yourself

VasiliyZaitzev · 2019-05-19T01:37:36+00:00

What do I do here?

You take the "L", and figure out what you are doing that you pick up such loser bitches.

And burn the couch. (Important: take outside of flat first.)

isthisalreadyused · 2019-05-18T18:19:12+00:00

If this actually happened, you can't let that bitch get away with it. You have her address, go to her door and try to get some restitution. Start with her, and if she doesn't respond, tell her parents. At the very least you'll get the satisfaction of knowing her household members will know what is surely one of her most embarrassing secrets.

The only reason I even recommend this is because she blocked you everywhere. If you have any self-respect, you won't let her get away with this shit

dutchgguy · 2019-05-18T20:51:13+00:00

send her the invoice

FlyingSexistPig · 2019-05-18T20:15:51+00:00

Take pictures and hand them to mom and dad.

53nis · 2019-05-18T19:21:35+00:00

You learned a lesson. Move on.

Emerald__Faith · 2019-05-19T01:00:18+00:00

Honestly bro show up to her parents house and explain what you said in this post

They might feel bad and pay what the daughter owes
They might laugh and say cya

Worth a shot

HurricaneHugues · 2019-05-18T21:36:48+00:00

Go to her house dude, wtf. After all that she blocks you and ghosts you? Wtf. Go to the bitch's crib and get her to pay up

Flintblood · 2019-05-19T01:35:23+00:00

No thanks. Sounds like some low class dumpster fire Tinder date. I like knowing I can get my wick waxed, but I’ve gone inactive on Tinder. FWIW, I have sort of been there, but now I am finding ways to qualify mental states and togetherness.

I am especially enjoying meeting serious women with aspirations on CMB. And finally meeting classier act Asian women.

Drive_Thru_Sushi · 2019-05-19T01:41:27+00:00

You bring a date home or a fucking stray? Holy shit 😂

dtyler86 · 2019-05-19T01:43:21+00:00

How old are both of you? If this girl is like living at home and she’s a freshman in college, it would be a very different story than if she’s 27

[deleted] · 2019-05-19T01:53:49+00:00

lmaoooooo. my golden rule: never smoke weed with girls you haven't already fucked. they ALWAYS get inside their head, shit starts getting weird and awkward, and the best part? You get to overthink alone about why you didn't get any pussy, while you're high, when they leave.

Again, do not smoke weed with girls that you have not already had sex with.

burrrahhh · 2019-05-19T04:59:10+00:00

Talk to her dad, tell him what she did. If he dosent give you the money, drop the couch at their front door.

Ohboohoolittlegirl · 2019-05-19T09:48:25+00:00

Dude.. Never ever let someone you want to do stuff with smoke weed after alcohol.. This is the standard reaction if you smoke weed after you are drunk. Lesson learned I hope

mallardcove · 2019-05-18T22:20:37+00:00

Weed is very low value behavior FYI, its hard to give your post any kind of respect at all when all I can do is envision you as an extremely low value pothead

billybetasnan · 2019-05-18T20:31:15+00:00

You sound like a fucking idiot bro.

Rkingpin · 2019-05-18T18:19:37+00:00

Thanks for reminding me I shouldn't be pissed I'm banned from that app

In this case chasing her does you no good. Women dont know how to take responsibility for their actions

Also, less time spent associating with low quality whores the better

Take the cash losses and move on quickly

Ryabemo · 2019-05-18T20:49:20+00:00

lol...

DerpJungler · 2019-05-18T22:14:38+00:00

Nothing you can do now to be honest. She fucked u over because you were nice to her. You should've kicked her out in her own clothes.

That's over now. Good advice: Fuck first, then smoke. Damage limitation.

its_meKnightSwolaire · 2019-05-18T22:36:29+00:00

You didn’t read the sidebar

PhoenixMDL · 2019-05-18T23:02:53+00:00

Learn your lesson?

TheTastelessBatman · 2019-05-18T23:43:25+00:00

Anal.

savageblunder · 2019-05-19T00:12:39+00:00

Who do you call to clean couch shit?

FereallyRed · 2019-05-19T00:43:16+00:00

Take the loss.

Learn and move on.

Nov51605 · 2019-05-19T01:21:18+00:00

the headline alone is GOLD ! thx for this

MurkyArtichoke · 2019-05-19T04:31:25+00:00

I mean, she obviously blocked you because she's incredibly embarrased and just wants to forget it all. Since you are asking what to do, does it mean you are still interested in her? She probably said the thing about paying for cleaning to just try to smooth out the situation. Unless you for some reason have some interest in her (after she puked and shat on your couch lol) then just forget about her. She probably wants the same thing.

thatbadrogue2 · 2019-05-19T05:28:52+00:00

your next tinder convo should definitely have something to do with "i dont think you can top my last date" and then proceed with the "well i bought her a drink, next thing i know she's shitting herself" great story tbh.

NeuroMnemonic7 · 2019-05-19T06:26:11+00:00

What do you mean what do you do?... everything is already done. Move on, wait for the money and that's that.

Thunderfin · 2019-05-19T06:39:00+00:00

Why do you act like it's her fault? Complete fail on your part to even allow that to escalate and eventually happen.

zxcvb7809 · 2019-05-19T07:35:05+00:00

Other people said it. You were played. I would definitely let this go and let this be a lesson learned the hard way.

You are correct in that she is not that bright. Which leads me to my next point.

You are also lucky she did not claim rape, domestic assault or something on those lines. LET THIS GO. She could come at you with some bull shit other wise.

PizzaAndProtein · 2019-05-19T08:59:24+00:00

Dump the shit stained couch in her front yard

Cametotherightplace · 2019-05-19T09:49:28+00:00

Throw out couch. Learn your lesson and Vet before bringing girl back to your place next time.

SpinPlates · 2019-05-19T10:23:05+00:00

I had a girl piss in my bed, cry and go sit in her car while i changed the sheets and scrubbed the mattress. I let her come back in that night. Next day I told her I wasn't mad that she pissed in my bed but was mad that she handled it like a child and cried in her car while I cleaned it. Cut her off that day.

Another another time a girl was riding on top of me. We were having sex for less than 5 minutes and she squirted literally a gallon a squirt (its been scientifically proven its just piss) all over me and my bed. Whenever I got up my mattress had a body outline like it was muder scene.

She went to the bathroom, was in there for a while. I was outside waiting to keep fucking. She comes out fully closed and said "I got mine" and then walked out and blocked me on everything.

Anyways, to get to your point you should pour Karo Syrup in her gas tank.

markyp1234 · 2019-05-19T11:52:41+00:00

Firstly, NEVER date or fuck a girl who does drugs. Not only it will be a bad experience for you (like this one), drugs can screw your memory and she can falsely accuse you of rape. Also, you might get into legal trouble otherwise for drug charges.

FanaticMind · 2019-05-19T21:32:32+00:00

It's just a shit test.

faustian_talos · 2019-05-27T11:31:19+00:00

There is a lesson for you.

Never get so far with a girl.

jenovajunkie · 2019-05-18T22:38:51+00:00

Shit in her mailbox.

bbcbarbarossa · 2019-05-19T01:24:01+00:00

Lol what the fuckkkk roflmao

bbcbarbarossa · 2019-05-19T01:24:48+00:00

Lmaoo the lengths some guys go to to get laid

kaolin224 · 2019-05-18T23:09:18+00:00

Fuck that, she's going to pay for it getting cleaned. If that's impossible she's paying for a replacement. A lot of people here are saying to let it go like they're afraid of confrontation.

I work my ass off to have nice things in my place, and I'm not about to let some entitled Tinder thot trash it and walk away because she can't handle her partying.

If she wants to play the fool, it's on you to teach her what being an adult means.

Set your phone to record, or better yet, bring a friend and show up to her place with her shit-stained clothes in a bag and tell her to pay up.

If she tries to cause a scene, call the cops immediately and tell them what happened.

Speak to the cops calmly and concisely. Don't threaten the family, lose your temper, or embellish in an attempt to humiliate. Just the facts, and always remain cool. You're in the right here, and you just want what's fair.

If you're lucky, the parents will be pieces of shit, too, which will work in your favor.

Then take her ass to small claims court. She's already lied once about paying by ghosting you. Now she gets to be embarrassed in front of an entire courtroom. That's how consequences work.

If she tries to claim sexual assault, you hire the best lawyer you can afford and bury her entire family.

Flintblood · 2019-05-19T01:50:18+00:00

If you really want to do something, just dump the couch on the curb in front of her parents house. Don’t say a word. Just know that she will see it and be reminded, but she will still have plausible deniability and won’t be scared that her parents will find out.

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