Mismatched couples where the woman is more attractive...

ozymandias271 · 2016-06-15T22:09:08+00:00

Some people get turned on by balloons. Human sexuality is marvelously varied.

Princeso_Bubblegum · 2016-06-15T21:16:57+00:00

How or why does it happen?

The woman likes the unattractive guy for some reason, maybe they have a good dynamic together, idk. I am not going to make a generalization here of when this happens. Humans and romance are things which don't act in accordance to economic principles.

Entropy-7 · 2016-06-15T22:24:04+00:00

Disclaimer: I've only ever been considered cute not hot.

I think it's silly to assume, just because she's more attractive, all the power is in her court. I have always been happier when I prioritize personality, social status and skills over looks in my relationships. I will also say being with someone who your friends/family love is a huge disincentive to cheat.

impossibleworlds · 2016-06-15T21:27:24+00:00

Call me a liar, this is my preferred dynamic. I pay a lot of attention to a guy's personality, energy, humour and drive. Looks by themselves don't cut it for me. He can't be a total ogre of course, but I'm usually bored by prettyboy types or even a lot of gymbros. Superficial dudes usually remind me of women, primping themselves and preferring to be pursued, which turns me off.

There's the obviously some degree of power differential in the arrangement that I find enjoyable, but I don't have that much difficulty with attraction assuming he's sufficiently masculine/meets my other thresholds.

DaphneDK · 2016-06-16T07:39:27+00:00

Can happen for a thousand reasons. Maybe she is dead tired of always being judged on her looks only. Pretty girls easily find themselves boxed in a pretty box. Perhaps its her rebellion.

Perhaps she just likes the guy.

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2016-06-15T21:19:08+00:00

How or why does it happen?

Dented can, betabux

Is the woman less likely to be faithful if she seems herself more attractive than her partner?

Yup

[deleted] · 2016-06-15T23:19:03+00:00

Because people often find other things more important than looks. Specially as they mature. Yes, it's difficult to believe for redpillers. But as a, at best, plain looking man pursued by a (way) more attractive woman, I testify for it. It was not wealth or status, for starters, because she believed I was a unemployed nerd for most of the time she spent looking for ways in.

elegant_ejaculation · 2016-06-15T23:42:18+00:00

I think in these instances, the woman values his other qualities besides looks. Perhaps he's financially successful, funny, dominant, ambitious, etc. I Should note that looks are important to most people, but for women, it isn't so much about conventional good looks as it is about a specific look; like a biker dude or a hipster.

I think the power is held by the person who cares the least. She may be beautiful, but if he doesn't care if she leaves or if he's able to date other equally attractive women, then he has the power. But if he's super-attached and thinks he can't do any better, then she has the power.

I think women mostly cheat because they are unsatisfied with their man. I don't think they take their lopsided attractiveness levels into account.

stats135 · 2016-06-15T23:46:05+00:00

Most couple are mismatched in some way. No market is perfectly competitive. There is always cost of transportation, barrier to entry/exit, and lack of complete information. These problems are even more pronounced in the dating market where things aren't as straight forward.

voteGOPk · 2016-06-16T02:17:41+00:00

I rarely see mismatched couples.

This seems to be one of those internet things. out in real world, everyone tends to fall into similar looks matched relationships

[deleted] · 2016-06-16T03:57:39+00:00

It happens cause women date upwards.

Oh wait.

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Master_of_Ritual · 2016-06-15T21:19:55+00:00

Usually there's some other factor or factors that compensate for mismatches in looks. Charm, money, etc. Also not every woman (or man for that matter) emphasizes looks equally.

[deleted] · 2016-06-16T02:04:36+00:00

Maybe she wants an uglier guy because uglier guys are less likely to cheat.

[deleted] · 2016-06-16T03:56:02+00:00

I'm very attracted to very kind hearted people. I am not very kind myself, the last person I saw was very kind. Easily in the top 5 most genuine people I've ever met. (though not number 1 for sure)

I wasn't so attracted to him physically at first, but it came over time when I realized he was a complete teddy bear - and this before I even approached him. He ended up being the person I was most attracted to that I've been with.

He possessed things I could never genuinely have, and I possessed looks. True kindness is not something that you can teach an old dog. (and I wouldn't call myself stunning either). I think what he has is much more valuable.

Entropy-7 · 2016-06-17T00:21:22+00:00

Money, status, power (his power or her power in the relationship), validation.

And yes, if she thinks she is sexier, she will wander.

crankypants15 · 2016-06-17T13:49:29+00:00

IMO: the woman knows what she wants and she knows what makes a successful relationship, and the man makes her happy. If I talked to these women I bet she knows much more about psychology and relationships, and has much better communication skills than most other women. I.e. she knows what she wants, and she asked for it, and she got it. Imagine that! :)

GaiusScaevolus · 2016-06-17T14:56:17+00:00

I've seen two types of couples this happens with.

1: A women brings her favorite beta up to the major leagues when she starts thinking marriage. These are normally characterized by a guy ~2 points lower in SMV, whom she knew 'like, forever' before they started dating. She'll talk a lot about 'dating her best friend' etc, and you can expect proposal/cohabitation within 6-18 mos. These have the greatest risk for infidelity or deadbedroom status, because she knows on some level she can do better, and he thinks or knows he can't.
2: A man with high value but moderate physical attractiveness gets women who are higher in SMV because his status/value is so high. Think Donald Trump, Newt Gingrich, Biggie Smalls, and on and on with almost every man with power or influence. A version of this effect is visible all the way down to the local level, as anyone who has ever been a bartender, DJ, or bouncer will tell you. The power dynamic here is different because the source of her power (her higher SMV), is a fungible asset to the man. She may be an 8, but he has ten different 6-8s a weekend hit on him, so she loses her power.

[deleted] · 2016-06-20T20:17:05+00:00

In my opinion mismatched couples with a more (physically) attractive woman usually happen because she's a dented can or has low self esteem for whatever reason, and because he is selling himself short.

Yes, the woman almost always has more power in such a relationship.

Yes, she is less likely to be faithful if she sees herself as more attractive than her husband. At the very least, she is likely to be less happy in the relationship than her husband.

At least this is my experience.

Title	Mismatched couples where the woman is more attractive...
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	1
Comments	55
Date	June 15, 2016 9:05 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/4o9nv8/mismatched_couples_where_the_woman_is_more/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/mismatched-couples-where-the-woman-is-more.274319 https://theredarchive.com/post/274319

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