Are Male Standards Higher than Female Standards?

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2016-02-17T14:18:09+00:00

what women think is a "good personality" and what men think is a "good personality" in a woman are two different things.

not being 20-30 lbs overweight is not an unrealistic beauty standard, 30 yrs ago almost no young people were fat

Archwinger · 2016-02-17T14:14:14+00:00

Are Male Standards Higher than Female Standards?

Absolutely not.

Men don't care about personality or even how good she is in household tasks or taking care of kids.

Right. Most men are losers and are happy to get any woman at all. They'll marry the first woman willing to date them and give them the time of day, and figure sex and respect will come over time. Ha.

All they care about is she meets unrealistic media standards.

Not really. That's a popular feminist trope. Most men are happy to get whatever they can. Yeah, a woman can't be enormous or grotesque, but your typical loser man is happy to end up with any average-ish girl. Women who aren't hot models do just fine attracting loser guys. Their problem is that they don't want any old guy. They want awesome guys -- and awesome guys can get hot women. With good personalities. Who rock at housework and childcare.

There is nothing they can do to improve SMV whereas men have limitless options.

There is absolutely no reason a woman can't hit the gym, develop useful skills, learn how to make a household work, improve her fashion and grooming -- not all that different from what men do. The skills and traits that make a woman valuable are a little different from what women look for in men, but there's definitely room for any woman to improve if she wants to. Most women just don't, because if you're average-ish, you can get men just fine. Conversely, average-ish men struggle to find willing women.

Women are expected to settle whereas men can make themselves interesting.

Women are encouraged to hold out for Mr. Right, and think that any man is lucky to have even an average-ish woman. Most loser men feel the same way. Men are the ones who are expected to take whatever they can get and be grateful for it. Women are the ones who are expected to demand the best from their men and make the men earn their companionship.

Men don't care about interesting women and want a blank slate.

It's more like what women think men ought to find interesting and valuable isn't what men actually find interesting and valuable. Women think that men should be looking for the same traits that women look for in men, which just doesn't happen.

5th_Law_of_Robotics · 2016-02-17T14:17:57+00:00

Given that we hear far more from women about how there are "no good men left" and how they should have to lower their standards just to find someone rather than the other way around I'd say no. You are describing the opposite of reality.

daveofmars · 2016-02-17T14:27:36+00:00

OP, take a moment to step back and ask yourself: "Am I projecting?"

BiggerDthanYou · 2016-02-17T14:04:15+00:00

[deleted] · 2016-02-17T14:45:49+00:00

The online dating game showed that 80% of men were disqualified as candidates for fucking/partnership, and what happens on a microscale tends more or less reflect the macro scale(society) right?

5th_Law_of_Robotics · 2016-02-17T14:18:16+00:00

Given that we hear far more from women about how there are "no good men left" and how they should have to lower their standards just to find someone rather than the other way around I'd say no. You are describing the opposite of reality.

SteelChicken · 2016-02-17T14:44:37+00:00

The definition of a shit-post.

wtknight · 2016-02-17T16:04:35+00:00

Are Male Standards Higher than Female Standards?

No, both have equally high standards. Men have lower standards sexually, obviously, but when it comes to relationships I think both genders start with equally high standards and eventually lower them from a range of a little bit to quite a bit depending upon how patient they can be waiting for that right person.

Xemnas81 · 2016-02-17T14:10:42+00:00

http://www.evanmarckatz.com/blog/dating-tips-advice/why-are-women-expected-to-date-men-with-a-lower-educational-level/

http://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2015/nov/10/dating-gap-hook-up-culture-female-graduates

https://www.vice.com/en_uk/read/youre-single-because-there-arent-enough-men-253

Carkudo · 2016-02-17T15:30:55+00:00

If we're just going to arbitrarily make up standards that supposedly all members of a gender share, then you're wrong, because women only ever want a literal male god who shits lightning and farts hurricanes and has temples built to worship him. That's way higher than "meets unrealistic media standards"

[deleted] · 2016-02-17T17:03:23+00:00

Ha. I've known women to turn down a man because the shoes he was wearing werent fashionable.

Surely if men dont care about personality, money, ambition,etc, then they have low standards? Women 'settle' because their ideal man is so unrealistic for a normal human being

[deleted] · 2016-02-17T18:11:13+00:00

For hook ups? Obviously not, men will fuck anything given the opportunity. But men who can afford to be picky will be extremely so when selecting for ltrs, even more selective than women in my opinion.

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red-triad · 2016-02-17T14:23:25+00:00

Not really sure what you are getting at... Are you referring to casual hookups, dating, LTR or marriage?

Casual sex: Look are pretty much the most important thing

Dating: Looks & personality

Long Term Relationship: Personality & Loyalty

Marriage: Personality, Loyalty & fitness as a parent

Honestly most men does not give a shit if you do household tasks or not. However if I am the sole breadwinner and you are a housewife, I obviously would expect a certain standard of cleanliness etc. However if you have a career then it is a 50/50 job.

On the issue of parenting... It is every parent's responsibility to teach, discipline and care for their children. If you make em, you are responsible for them. Obviously if you are a stay at home mom then you will spend more time caring for them. I bring in the bacon, you care for our children. If you have a career, then it is going to have to be a 50/50 thing.

SMV... The man and women both have to expend effort in their appearance. Might sound harsh, but it is unfortunately true.

If you go fat, don't care about your appearance and the like, how are you going to expect your husband to find you attractive? Love, partnership & mutual respect goes a long way and keeps your relationship strong but attraction is totally different. it can't be negotiated, and if you are not attracted to someone then you simply are not attracted to someone. I have seen women in her 40's and higher with absolutely amazing bodies and clothing.

Now the flipside is that the paragraph above is 100% true for guys as well. If I get fat, dress like a slob how am I going to expect you to be attracted to me and want to have sex with me?

Now on the subject of attraction. I have been with women who's face is maybe a 4 or 5, however her body is a 9 and her appearance (clothing, makeup etc.) is a 9. I would be totally into her because overall she comes out at a 7 or 8. I have seen totally hot women with scars (other factors increasing her SMV).

And never discount personality, a women that is maybe a 6 can totally bump up her sex appear with a naughty & fun attitude.

Bottom line. If your face is a HB4 maybe, your body is a 9 (totally doable), your clothes and makeup is a 9(totally doable) and you have a great personality, is intelligent, great sense of humor, fun, naughty (but nice) & sexually adventurous I would totally hit on you and even consider you for LTR (as long as you are not crazy).

Wow, that was a long answer and I do not even know what you really asked. Hope that helps though :P

mrcs84usn · 2016-02-17T14:25:58+00:00

All they care about is she meets unrealistic media standards.

Right. TRP has never talked about women "punching above their weight class" ever.

connor1003 · 2016-02-17T16:51:31+00:00

[deleted]

What is this?

[deleted] · 2016-02-17T20:54:18+00:00

Men don't care about personality?? News to me. I broke up with my last ex because she had no personality.. Will miss that ass tho, body was fantastic..

Men have limitless options? Also news to me. You think the fat guy who plays xbox all day has supermodels "settling" for him??

You get out of life what you put into it.

voteGOPk · 2016-02-17T23:36:03+00:00

nah.

pretty much don't be very fat and don't be deformed is all I need.

and I need plenty of men who think they way I do.

JohnDoeSnow · 2016-02-18T01:36:45+00:00

Absolutely not. Just looking at the dating world, online or no, and you'll see it

How common is it for girls to have disgust for guys into sports or into video games? REALLY common, especially video game hate from modern left of center girls.

Unless your hobbies involve finger painting with your menstrual blood or getting reamed by other men all day every day, no man will reject you for your hobbies.

Looking at online dating, so many girls have "dont message me if X y z/ unless X y z."

Guys don't have the audacity or ego to pull it off because they can't and don't have constant undeserved validation

[deleted] · 2016-02-18T15:25:03+00:00

Standards are what you make them. Your original statement isn't true at all. I can only speak for my demographic, but I've not encountered a man who wants only beauty in a partner, and I'm constantly around men due to my education, job and hobbies. Both men and women want to date interesting, fun, intelligent good people, that are physically attractive (what we call physically attractive varies person to person) and are doing something useful with their lives. I've met more women with unrealistic high standards than men, but overall, the societal standards aren't anything enforced.

Five_Decades · 2016-02-18T23:38:53+00:00

It is the exact opposite in real life. Women have more to lose by making a bad mating decision since women invest more physically and psychologically in procreation.

So women are far pickier than men, this is true across the animal kingdom. I believe in the animals where the male invests more in procreation and children, the men are the choosier gender in those species.

I disagree that men don't care about personality or raising kids. Men do care about that stuff. Maybe not for a one night stand, but if this is a woman they are going to date with any seriousness guys look for those things. The problem (among many) is that we aren't always a good judge. Many men have met women only to have them change drastically after marriage in how they act/treat people.

Also I don't think men are the ones holding women to the medias standards. Women do that to themselves and each other. In my experience lots of men are reasonably forgiving for physical imperfections, women are far harder on themselves and each other. There are some men who are very judgmental, but people are their own worst critics.

Title	Are Male Standards Higher than Female Standards?
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	0
Comments	86
Date	February 17, 2016 2:00 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/468qll/are_male_standards_higher_than_female_standards/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/are-male-standards-higher-than-female-standards.276205 https://theredarchive.com/post/276205

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