What # makes a slut?

DOCTORxTEETH · 2015-04-30T05:47:18+00:00

For me, it's not just about numbers, it's about the shit that you do. I knew a girl that broke up with her boyfriend, the guy she presumably lost her virginity to, and went on to have give oral to one guy and had sex with another at a party a week later. Even though she technically only had sex with three guys in her life at that point, she's still a slut in my mind because a woman that wasn't a slut, or on the road to becoming one, wouldn't do something like that.

Now an exact number? I don't know. All I know is that, for women in my age group, if your number is past 9, that either means you started fucking really young or you've been doing it very frequently for the past few years, and I'm not comfortable with either of those things.

ThorLives · 2015-04-29T19:09:38+00:00

This isn't really an answer to your question, but I find the question of "What # makes a slut?" to be flawed from the very start. I often see it as a debate tactic to deny that "slut" has any valid definition (i.e. "If you can't give a number, then the word has no meaning" kind of argument). I think most people who would use the word "slut" wouldn't define it as a number so much as a number relative to age. In other words, a girl who's slept with a dozen guys by age 16 is seen very differently than a girl who has slept with a dozen guys by age 40.

cxj · 2015-04-29T18:41:38+00:00

For me, personally, any single digit partner count is acceptable, even laughably innocent. Teen numbers, not a dealbreaker but proceed with caution. I'm not thrilled about it but frankly if the girl is cute, does everything I want in the bedroom, is chill, and I'm convinced she has moved past whatever in her life influenced her to bang so many dudes, I'm probably down. 20+ = slut, do not want for an LTR, will hookup with indefinitely though.

SOwED · 2015-04-29T17:46:03+00:00

Even though the hard definition of slut is just a woman who sleeps with many men, I have always included the connotation of the circumstances surrounding her sexual activity with the word slut.

To me, a well-adjusted woman who has a high partner count because she simply likes sex is much less of a slut than a woman who is self-medicating with sex and attention, even if she has a lower partner count.

My point is that it's much more than the number.

buartha · 2015-04-29T16:02:21+00:00

It's less about the number for me and more about how well you know the people you sleep with and the level of commitment you require before you have sex. A man or woman who'd had recent ONSs would qualify as promiscuous by my standards, whereas someone who'd had a couple of LTRs wouldn't, even if they'd slept with the same number of people.

That said, I don't think that promiscuity is a bad thing or an automatic disqualifier when it comes to potential LTR partners. My partner had quite the roller coaster of sexual experiences before we got together and our relationship is great. A serial monogamist who cheated or left their partners and moved onto other people suspiciously quickly multiple times would be more of a red flag to me than someone who slept around.

lxnarratorxl · 2015-04-29T15:50:10+00:00

Well I'm a slut of a man no doubt there, so I probably wouldnt commit to a relationship to anyone above or around my number. But its preference Im sure some people dont care, some never want to know, I do want to know and it will affect how I view them because that is how I feel about it.

Lyraless · 2015-04-29T16:05:15+00:00

For me it's more a general behavior rather than a simple number count. Quite hard to define though.

Christian_Kong · 2015-04-29T20:28:35+00:00

Pulling this out of my ass for now but around < or = partner a year from age 16 seems nice. Unfortunately most girls I've known are > their total age by the time they are done with college.

Postboned · 2015-04-29T23:58:34+00:00

More than one. The one also has to include your own.

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FattestRabbit · 2015-04-30T01:01:49+00:00

kittukatsu · 2015-04-30T06:00:16+00:00

So... There is exactly one woman I know personally I would call "slut" on. I hate her for other reasons, but her sexual umm.. prowess.. I guess... I would call her a slut. I don't really like the word and don't use it often but she's 25>her age>30 and she has (self professed) had >125 partners... I won't touch a man if I know she's so much as said hello to him, I don't want whatever she has.

Personally, I won't sleep with/ date (I don't do ONS, I tried it once to see if I'd like it, not my cup of tea, I prefer committed relationships and only sleep with guys who commit to me monogamously first outside of my one ONS) any man who has a count >50. In my age range that's just a bit ridiculous in my opinion, I try to be understanding of "young and wild" phases, but sometimes if I don't like the guy enough... It just isn't going to happen. To me it indicates a lack of ability to commit to or remain monogamous and I flipped out pretty hard last time a guy cheated on me. He literally had sex with a different woman in MY bed, fuck that guy, if a guy says he doesn't know how many he's slept with I proceed with caution.

I'm not a slut, and I won't date a guy who can't say the same.

Rhunta · 2015-04-30T17:26:02+00:00

Trp says that a slut is a woman that cant get commitment from a man while giving sex.

max_peenor · 2015-04-29T15:58:12+00:00

YOLO isn't a number.

relationshipdownvote · 2015-04-29T17:51:56+00:00

Where x is your current age (assuming you are 17 or older)

ceil((x-17)/(x/5))

drok007 · 2015-04-29T15:31:43+00:00

Not really a number range as much as an attitude or view on things.

Hamstronaut · 2015-04-29T15:38:55+00:00

A double digit partner count.

rafay_M · 2015-04-29T17:41:27+00:00

heh. this question is so demeaning, i love it. Even more in person. There's like a 50% you'll plausibly deniably catch her in the net you're trawling.

Anyway, my threshold:

5 or more by 25 is slut.

10 or more is a total whore.

20 or more and i'll throw in a condescendingwonkajpg

exit_sandman · 2015-04-29T17:12:36+00:00

at or around what # of past sexual partners do you consider a person, male or female, to be slutty or promiscuous?

Depends on age. Being at #5 at the age of 14 or 15 is different than being there in your late 20s. Also depends on their state of mind. Let me tell you a story of two women I know.

One was a girl I got to know at college. She was pretty unique insofar as she was very cooperative when it came to dating (i.e. she was rather proactive about making her interest known), and also because she dated rather unlikely guys (all the guys I know of she has been into have overall been decidedly non-alpha). Even though her relationships didn't last forever and maybe she had got to a double digit partner count over the years (I don't know, but I think it's entirely conceivable considering that I know of several breakups, and we didn't even keep in touch that much), I couldn't label her as slutty - she would have been the type to stick with one guy if everything had panned out, and also never tried to snatch a supremely desirable guy above her league by putting out (well, maybe she had done so it in the past, but it would have severely out of character for her considering the type of guy she went for even in her early 20s).

Now compare that to a girl in my extended social circle I've met a few times but who immediately let my hoedar go off. Twice I had been with her when our group went to a club, both times she went home with a guy (once with a guy who was tall, dark and handsome, and once with a bad boy with more tattoos than uninked skin), and both times she tried to bone her way into a relationship. Her last two "relationships" had been with married guys and her as the affair. Now she's 29 and in the "I stop doing that stuff, even if that means I'll be single for a while, I deserve better"-phase. But I digress. So, that woman, even if she was still below 10 (which I doubt, but let's assume she was)... well she would be slut regardless.

One_friendship_plz · 2015-04-29T16:15:08+00:00

I'd look at someone as a slut if they're having sex for the sake of having sex.

Having one night stands, random sex, having a boyfriend just so you can get laid... I could still fuck her, but some other poor sap is going to commit to her.

Title	What # makes a slut?
Author	Hamstronaut
Upvotes	5
Comments	111
Date	April 29, 2015 3:29 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/34aa2b/what_makes_a_slut/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-makes-a-slut.282421 https://theredarchive.com/post/282421

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