Help with girlfriend

weakandsensitive · 2019-10-23T05:05:09+00:00

Tits or get the fuck out. Yours or hers doesn't really matter.

Shitposts only.

dolanthesemicolon · 2019-10-23T12:24:57+00:00

I'll give you an insight into the future. But first let me introduce you to MY past. About 17/18 years ago I found a girl who wasn't a girly girl, was great fun when out, she said she never had a relationship like the one we had, we fell in love... but there was a distinct lack of passion. There just wasn't a spark in the bedroom. We tried things, but it was... a bit boring. I thought it would develop, surely it would? All the love and "feelz" are there? Our relationship was awesome, just apart from the sex. As we get more comfortable with each other it would surely get better?

Roll on about 10 years. Before we had kids. We're in a close to dead bedroom. They say it's clinically dead if you're not having sex at least once a month. I'd say we had sex, on average, about twice a month. And boring sex at that, the same sex every fucking time. But it wasn't enough for me, so as far as my needs were concerned it was a dead bedroom. I'm pissed off, I'm needy, I'm constantly bringing up sex and how it needs to improve, and I'm not happy.

That's your future. How does it sound? That was me about, mabye 6 or 7 years ago. Sex improved for a few years after that, because guess what? We decided to have kids. And that requires a lot of sex each month. After the kids, boom, back to square one. And here I am.

So about 2 years ago I found the dead bedrooms reddit. Didn't fucking work, it's all bullshit advice just to get you a trickle of pity sex. Then I found here.

I'm still beta. I'm still a faggot. But I now see I've been playing this all wrong. So don't be me. Don't be a faggot... well too late, you already are, but at least you caught the disease early. Get fixing this now, because it's much MUCH harder to fix this shit when you're older and you're double digits long into your relationship.

TLDR; Lift, STFU, Read the side bar. Seriously.

Sepean · 2019-10-23T06:44:47+00:00

So I have a great girlfriend. She motivates me, always works with me, and is generally pretty affectionate. But there's one problem: our sex drives.

I'm sure her sex drive is just fine, you're just not attractive.

I know I'm a pleaser and I know I give in to her a lot but she's also not that difficult. I know I'm a great boyfriend in the sense of being loving and devoted. But I'm definitely not the macho type who takes charge.

This sums up perfectly how a man will end up in a dead bedroom

She says this is the healthiest relationship she's ever been in and I feel like there's love but very little passion.

Don't listen to your wife. She will not give you pointers on how to improve your relationship, on the contrary. Girls tell you to be a good provider, devoted and supplicant and to care for her needs - it is a test to see if you're strong and confident enough to be fuckable. If you comply, you signal you are weak and she won't fuck you, but instead she gets a guy who will take care of her. We call compliant guys betas, and she might give you a bit of sex, the bare minimum to keep you around (and that becomes MUCH lower the more committed you get, especially after children she'll know you're hooked even without pussy).

And that definitely shows in the bedroom. I know how to make her feel loved but I just can't figure out how to turn her on.

Read the sidebar, it's all on there.

I've read The Game and was pretty successful with women before my current girlfriend

There are two reasons for this. One, many guys are much less supplicant when dating than in an LTR - so they're more attractive while dating. The other part is that girls will pretend to like guys who are supplicant to get them into an LTR, but she'll only do the bare minimum necessary.

naturally I'm not the extremely confident type.

You'll have to learn to be confident.

For a little more clarity, she is definitely not a girly girl and doesn't seem to respond to most of the tricks of attraction I know.

Just read the sidebar and do what it says.

bogeyd6 · 2019-10-23T07:20:06+00:00

If this is all you have, then its probably best you give up and become a monk. Protip for the future is to not date butch lesbians if you are a man.

31ar · 2019-10-23T11:01:53+00:00

Firstly, this should be titled "Help with me" -- not "Help with girlfriend". You're the problem - and unless you realise that, you're not going to be able to truly fix it.

How did I find TRP? Well I was in the exact same situation as you (5+ years ago). Everything was amazing, except this 1 thing.

Of course, we broke up a few months later. Spectacular girl, but she just slowly lost most and more respect for me.

If you're going to do this, you need to do this ON YOUR OWN. You can't confide in her, or talk to her about it.

When reading TRP - understand that there's 2 parts to it. There's the reality of sexual dynamics (theory), and there's the way users here suggest you deal with things (action).

I'll tell you that the theory part is 10000% painfully true and gut-wrenchingly accurate. The suggested action is the part that should be taken with a pinch of salt, and sometimes gives this sub a bad name. Pick and choose what actions feel right for you (eg. you might not want to 'spin plates' since you're in a relationship).

You're going to have to change the fundamental way you think about things relating to women & relationships.

You'll need to be more confident in yourself.

Don't try going from 0-60 in 1.9 seconds. Take small steps. She WILL push back on some things if you go too fast and she senses something is up. Don't get butthurt.

On the other hand, she might also compliment you or 'reward' you when she sees something she likes.

Both can & will happen.

I'm not going to spoon feed you or make a list. Why don't you do some sidebar reading and then reply with a list of 3 simple things you're going to change this month.

EXAMPLE:

I'm going to be more vocal about the restaurant I want to eat at, rather than deferring to her choices just to please her.
Start playing tennis once a week. Every damn week. No excuses.
Won't try to initiate sex for 2 weeks.
Will confidently and proudly bring up an achievement / accomplishment at work once a week.

rocknrollchuck · 2019-10-23T14:29:30+00:00

You have no idea how fortunate you are to have stumbled across this sub. Click on "Steel's Detailed Guide To Married Red Pill" and get busy reading. You've been blessed with something that very few men will ever truly know.

AlohaMaui808 · 2019-10-23T06:25:50+00:00

Faggot. Use a finger and your eyes before typing all this bullshit. This is not that kind of sub. We won't spoon feed you here. Did you even look at ANYTHING posted here before you wrote this? Stop being lazy. Everything you've asked is already answered

matrixtospartanatLV · 2019-10-23T12:23:49+00:00

Why is this nearly zero effort post on the main sub?

This motherfucker did literally nothing before posting.

Techn1ckS · 2019-10-23T05:23:05+00:00

Read the fucking sidebar. I can tell you didn't read shit and just stumbled in here asking noob questions. Stop being a faggot and read the fucking sidebar. Or just start here https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/acvzgx/steels_guide_to_married_red_pill/

Also shit like this doesn't belong here, try r/AskMRP

Balls_Wellington_ · 2019-10-23T13:53:23+00:00

Try asking her bull what she likes

perhapsnew · 2019-10-23T07:16:59+00:00

So, she does not want you and yet it’s “healthiest relationship ever” for her. What the f**k, man? Do you have any self-respect?

SBIII · 2019-10-23T08:21:57+00:00

If she's not a girly girl and hasn't responded to your usual tricks, then you should try the The Kentucky Hershey Bar.

For this trick, you need to take a shit onto a piece of cling film.

Then you wrap it up, form it into the shape of a fat sausage, then put it in the freezer.

When it's solid, use it on her as you would a dildo.

UnbreakableFrame · 2019-10-23T14:11:18+00:00

I heard that the best way to rekindle attraction in this situation is to introduce another man into the bedroom.

ashen_graphics · 2019-10-23T06:44:24+00:00

I mean... hey atleast it sounds like (except for the Sex Part) that youre in a good relationship. Like the others already said you should read the sidebar. All of it - multiple times, until you get conscious of your and her behaviours.

I'd also recommend reading athol kays books. These were real eye opening for me back then.

TheBunk_TB · 2019-10-23T15:38:40+00:00

Stop trying. Why don't you just enjoy yourself? This sounds like a NMMNG situation.

ryta1203 · 2019-10-24T16:49:13+00:00

She wants you to be a man, grow the fuck up and own it. You are the king of your domain, you don't need approval from anyone and the buck stops with you. You have no one to look up to but yourself because you are at the top. Accept it and get used to it. If she can't handle that, another girl will gladly step in because ultimately, that's what they want.

NotBlackPhillip · 2019-10-24T20:49:53+00:00

Should've titled this post "HOW TO DRY UP A PUSSY"

clitspit · 2019-10-24T15:16:09+00:00

Here is a tip that worked for a friend that was in the same rut. He went to his wife and told her that he has a confession that he has a fetish for eating pussy. His wife was taken aback but finally gave in and agreed to let him eat her out. The routine was after dinner he would ask her politely...can I please taste your pussy. Well after the first 2 times, this has led to frequent and enjoyable sex. She gets in the mood.

Title	Help with girlfriend
Author	Goldengirlsluvr999
Upvotes	0
Comments	37
Date	October 23, 2019 4:57 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MarriedRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/dlue3c/help_with_girlfriend/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MarriedRedPill/help-with-girlfriend.292362 https://theredarchive.com/post/292362

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