‼️🚩 If a guy says “Don't post pics of us online. I don't like PDA” dump him immediately. 🚩‼️

Phoenix__Rising2018 · 2020-10-16T15:28:14+00:00

This or he already has a wife or girlfriend.

fim_de_semana · 2020-10-16T15:59:14+00:00

I want a guy who is proud to be seen with me.

Knitter-of-Data · 2020-10-16T16:15:54+00:00

And really, if a guy says “don’t post pics of ____ online.” dump him immediately.🚩🚩🚩🚩🚩

It is neither normal nor healthy nor ok for a guy to expect to be able to tell you what to do and/or make decisions about your social media presence or activities.

smallishtree · 2020-10-16T16:48:55+00:00

Ugh my ex’s most recent pic (TO THIS DAY!!!) is a pic of his ex from a year ago. I dated him after they ended things and he took no pics with me or of us. Surprise surprise he still talks to this ex... 🙄

pickmieshaexorcist · 2020-10-16T17:07:03+00:00

It’s never a good sign. At worst, he’s a cheater (or wannabe cheater) and at “best” he’s just not into you or embarrassed of you. My ex never wanted to be listed as my husband on FB, never interacted with me online, despite me wanting it. Mind you, we were high school sweethearts and had been together forever. He’d turn it around on me, claiming I was immature and making a big deal about social media which was the dumbest thing ever according to him. I did feel bad at the time and convinced myself that maybe I was being silly. After our divorce, guess how long it took him to list his new GF on his FB? That shit happened immediately. It really put a lot of things into perspective for me and let me know that those nagging feelings I had back then of feeling rejected and unwanted, and like he was embarrassed of me, were entirely correct.

electroloop · 2020-10-16T15:59:19+00:00

Also to add to this:

He refuses to let you take pictures of him at all. Or he’s always in motion and a blur when you try to take a photo of him.

Definitely playing the field and doesn’t want to get exposed for the cheating scum he is.

babielamb · 2020-10-16T18:13:42+00:00

On the flip side of things, watch out for someone that is flaunting you to try to make past flings or exes jealous.

smart-tart23 · 2020-10-16T18:58:36+00:00

So true. Met a LVM on hinge but he hid that well for the first few weeks. I am a single mom and got a babysitter on a Friday night bc he wants to take me out dancing. Mind you everything had been closed bc Covid and had just opened back up. He was love bombing me and trauma bonding I now see, but I figured well, he seems alright we spend a lot of time. Go out on this ‘date’ where supposedly he wants me to meet his friends. I dress super cute. He shows up in jeans and a tshirt.. first clue. Takes me to get food and complains I’m expensive. Get to said dance hall and soon as he sees his friends not only does not introduce me but legit his body language was so strongly reading: don’t even think about acting like I am with you. He wouldn’t even look at me. So his friends get up and I’m like aren’t you going to give me a kiss? Up to this point there was a lot of affection (not in public) and that’s when he was like oh if you think I’m the kind of guy who displays public affection you’re all wrong... mind you before saying he wanted a relationship. Since I got the sitter I ended up buying myself a drink and meeting a few women who were like ... WHY are you with that guy he’s a total player and he is telling everyone how crazy you are. Ah. Thanks to the females who kept it real. I knew I was done so I just never called or text. About a week later he’s like see I knew you were seeing someone else otherwise you wouldn’t ghost me so deuces b. I didn’t respond and just blocked and deleted him. Long way of saying this is 100 million percent a huge red flag. I got lucky I found a group of females with some girl code. He also wanted to follow me on insta but never post pics together and was always hiding his phone. Later scrot!

kettleodumplins · 2020-10-16T17:48:44+00:00

Yes, and don't fall for the "I'm just a private person." Even if he shows privacy concerns in other areas, he should not be controlling what YOU add to social media.

Who he is married to is public domain.
Who he lives with is public domain.
If he has a social media at all, then wanting to keep out who he is dating is akin to climbing to the top of a 100 ft tree and clipping off a leaf. His entire social network and family is big data / public domain.
Who he is dating early on is of no value to hackers/tHE gOvEerNnment (!!)/ big data and if you so much as e-mail/text then "they" already know.
Unless he is a full blown prepper - in other word he is (not 'wants to,' not 'is planning to') living off solar power and keeping food storage in a locked basement then there are ulterior motives to controlling your social media.

Do not try to use this to reason with or argue with LVMs. It just gives them Google ammo to use to trick you or the next girl that he is probably already talking to. Leave, block and delete.

themintmitten · 2020-10-17T00:19:19+00:00

My ex used to tell me he didnt post pics of us bc 1) i posted the same pics before he could and 2) he was worried about any psychos who would see his posts and target those he loved. Funny tho cuz he would still post pics of his family.....

We’re broken up now, thank god😂

blue_nirvana · 2020-10-17T00:56:57+00:00

My ex never said don't post pics of us. However...

I never really paid attention to his Facebook page. I tagged him in photos of us and our children. I commented occasionally. I trusted. Foolishly.

As I considered divorce, I looked at his Facebook page. And lo and behold, exactly one photo of me was visible... And it's a truly awful photo of me physically. I'm not being self deprecating. I'd given birth a few days before and I'm asleep with my child in a stretchy dress and I LOOK like I just gave birth. I didn't post the photo, he did. All the other photos I tagged him in? Of us? With our kids? Hidden. Not untagged. Just hidden from his timeline. So I had no idea until I specifically went to his page and looked. Clever. Photos of our kids and him with our kids that I tagged him in were visible. Father of the year of course. So fucking clever.

I have no clear proof of him cheating. But my heart knows he did. My brain does too. And I remind myself of this any time I feel guilty for ending things. I don't regret having my children but I'll spend most of their young lives making up for my poor choice in mate.

KindredMaximus · 2020-10-17T00:52:29+00:00

Bit different when you're over 40 and have kids, IMHO. I sure didn't want to be on his FB and I didn't want him on mine until at least a year in. We don't treat FB the same and a lot of us, don't want our private lives all over social media. It feels like a huge invasion of privacy. We don't use insta outside of business and reading stories disjointed by a word count on twitter is just plain annoying. I barely post anything or spend much time on there and after watching The Social Dilemma, I'll be even less inclined to connect or post pics online. I would be very concerned if a guy I was seeing was posting me all over social media. I'd feel invaded.

Carpedictum · 2020-10-16T18:09:13+00:00

[deleted]

Missybanana · 2020-10-17T03:05:19+00:00

... Or he is waiting to get an arranged marriage. That happened to me. He was my boyfriend for THREE. Damn. Years. And he breaks up with me, leaves the country, and is engaged the next week. Fuck that. No one is just so private that you can't have one picture together.

Woke_Woman · 2020-10-17T08:51:41+00:00

[deleted]

2020-10-16T18:13:23+00:00

I would hope this would be common sense for a lot of women.

Rasaya87 · 2020-10-17T01:53:14+00:00

My narc ex never took one picture of me for the whole year we were together. Red flag 1 of many, turned out.

UnforgettableBevy · 2020-10-17T02:36:27+00:00

Absolute truth. Last guy I dated was still tagged in his ex’s photos, and he still had photos of her on his timeline. We took photos but neither of us posted them because I’ve been burned before, and I had a very public job. Still didn’t matter. Wish I had not have been so damn happy that someone was finally treating me well, a lot of good that did me.

Woke_Woman · 2020-10-16T17:18:15+00:00

[removed]

zippxzipp · 2020-10-18T05:17:02+00:00

Yes.. additionally...If he has little to no social media/online presence or is weird about being a part of yours then he’s 100% hiding something. Literally, just run before you have to find out what it is.

As a recent example...I connected with a seemingly smart and successful guy on OLD who ran his own company...he gave me his insta which I was immediately turned off by, but I bit because I’m nosey. His insta had nothing personal on it - all professional/company related posts but no photos of him doing stuff. This was so strange to me...like dude said he had dogs and the dogs weren’t even featured! I guess some people may be super impressed by him flaunting his company... anywho.. a quick google search (had to spell his name a couple of different ways) uncovered he had multiple arrests/mugshots in just the past few years...trespassing, assault, and 2 were for stalking. So yeah he’s blocked/reported... but let his social media or lack thereof speak for itself. Stay safe ladies or as my favorite auntie says “keep your panties up and the bullshit down!”

Title	‼️🚩 If a guy says “Don't post pics of us online. I don't like PDA” dump him immediately. 🚩‼️
Author	Woke_Woman
Upvotes	431
Comments	38
Date	October 16, 2020 10:43 AM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/jc7m2l/if_a_guy_says_dont_post_pics_of_us_online_i_dont/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/if-a-guy-says-dont-post-pics-of-us-online-i-dont.319717 https://theredarchive.com/post/319717

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