I am getting tired..

alex_de_tampa · 2020-12-28T10:46:16+00:00

Just be thankful you have the strength to walk away. Also stop putting your heart in it. Enjoy the time but you have to work on the attachment. Learn to enjoy being single as much as being with a girl. I enjoy myself but I also enjoy spending time with a female. But either is fine.

Musicgoon · 2020-12-28T12:04:39+00:00

Move on that's step one. Step two is date for fun. Don't look for a girlfriend of a life partner. Don't look for loyalty. Have fun, go out and do interesting things. Spin lots of plates dgaf. Collect women like Pokemon. Enjoy the game. Also take some time and do something indulgent for yourself only. It helps.

bumbandit999 · 2020-12-28T19:40:33+00:00

She cried because she had a fight with her ex and came to you to talk about it. My mind is blown. You made the right decision obviously.

glowing_dolphins · 2020-12-28T13:53:10+00:00

Staying in the game long enough to get a win is a brilliant strategy. You didn’t shack up with someone you didn’t want. That’s good. You live to fight another round.

Sometimes you win with the first punch. Sometimes you gotta stay in the game long enough so you can hit a knockout.

The game isn’t over because you haven’t won yet.

iusedtobeasheep37 · 2020-12-28T16:43:47+00:00

Yes, we can.

Congrats on having the balls to cutt her off and stop dealing with her BS.
Realize that HUMANS, not only girls, are full of flaws. I know a substantial amount of men that behave like assholes, would stab me if I give them the chance and would blame another person. Keep that kind of ppl out of your life.
Shake it off lifting, doing some cardio, eating and sleeping. Today, no excuses.
Start spining plates. I dont know how old are you but if you could get a GF you can 100% get other girls. You would be amazed by how many guys are forced incels, obese, eternal virgins, depressed and smoking pot or doing blow to counter attack the forced loneliness they are subjected to.
Tonight start a fire, throw some meat to the grill, open a beer and celebrate that you are single again. No more prision food budy. Extra bonus points if you invite some friends over and listen to them, for sure they have problems too and you can advise them. Feels great to help other ppl, try it. Of course, FRIENDS, not idiots.
DO NOT, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCE, feel sorry for your self or allow your situation to depress you. Stand up, put your anger in your hands and lift something. Repeat until failure.
Block that beatch, go zero contact from now on.

Marry xmas and happy new year. Hope to hear from you in 2 weaks when you are back on your feet again.

used2befast · 2020-12-28T14:31:05+00:00

I know that feeling well man. So many of these bitches have these red flags. I've been seeing one with more red flags that communist China but I've detached and learned to view the situation as non committal and just for fun. She has all these orbiters and maintains a connection with her ex. I've even caught her lying to me about going out with him.

Enjoy the solo time man and learn to embrace the solitude.

CashSplash123 · 2020-12-28T18:47:18+00:00

I hate to break it to everybody, but you are every girl’s rebound after her first. They always talk to their exes and always keep their options open.

Optionality=power

That’s why it’s pointless LTR-ing anybody.

smhfamswag · 2020-12-28T17:15:42+00:00

“breakup after breakup” yup, you can’t be alone. STOP LOOKING FOR LOVE.

I’m guessing you’re a young guy, you should be slanging dick. on some genghis khan shit. men shouldn’t even entertain a serious relationship until they’re like 30 (and that’s when you enter your prime, so you can have your picks then while the girls are washed up). just have fun and fuck sluts, don’t get any emotions involved

Internet-Troll · 2020-12-28T18:50:45+00:00

These women is not worth it. Don't get into a relationship until you vetted them completely. They can hide things pretty well before the 3 months mark

cunningcaring · 2020-12-28T12:54:06+00:00

No girlfriend, just plates.

King-in-the-making · 2020-12-28T18:54:12+00:00

First of all, I’m sorry man, that’s shitty. But this situation is more universal then you think.

Okay, so there’s this tried and true statement that floats around here on TRP:

“She’s never really yours, it’s just your turn.”

You handled the breakup well, but here’s where I see you can improve. When you said, “break up after break up” it told me that you might be the type of person who always NEEDS to have some sort of companionship to feel like you’re whole. We all do initially, it’s how we are conditioned today.

Right now, you’re in anger phase. Totally understandable now that you can see female nature for what it is, HYPERGAMY is their number 1 priority. Eventually it goes away (I was a hard case, maybe 4 or 5 years) and that’s when you can really be analytical on how deal with women, your emotions become a bit more tempered when approaching any situation.

Your best course of action:

Take a year or two and get used to being content with being on your own, by yourself. I’m not talking MGTOW, but I’m simply saying you can take or leave female (or male) attention with a grain of salt. Women really are a compliment, not center, to who you are as a person.

Make YOURSELF the only person you want to invest in. FOREVER. PERIOD. Your friends and family be damned. YOU come first, always. Then decide what’s truly worth it.

Hit the gym, Read something new everyday, and find a consistent hobby you enjoy with a good male role model structure that you can throw yourself into when times get like this.

Blackhawk2479 · 2020-12-28T13:31:20+00:00

The solution is to stop getting into relationships. Stop being exclusive, start plating multiple girls and suddenly this sort of bullshit is a non-event.

Freedom__Fighter · 2020-12-28T19:42:57+00:00

"You gotta wade through a bunch of shit to find someone worthy enough" - George Washington

Pen2When · 2020-12-28T19:05:21+00:00

She definitely was still fucking the ex and you were the side piece, fuck her.

W_O_M_B_A_T · 2020-12-28T15:37:16+00:00

The only thing in life that's fair for everyone, easy and simple, is dying.

Remember nobody forced you to invest your time, energy, and commitment in your ex. You did it because you felt it was valuable and worthwhile for you personally.

jdotw9 · 2020-12-28T17:06:52+00:00

Mate good on you for walking away, move on hard but got to be done

ScalpelLifter · 2020-12-28T19:03:00+00:00

Having the strength to walk away is the hardest part and you did it

yblaze27 · 2020-12-28T18:51:06+00:00

Nah fuk tht u did the right thing on to the next one instead of dealing with a female like tht

Rimefang · 2020-12-28T19:08:16+00:00

You're doing fine, ace!

2000inchbiceps · 2020-12-28T19:41:35+00:00

It's a hard pill to swallow man. Got to accept and be okay that you can't control people 100% and let them go when they cross the line. Analyze what you can change then move on, and never look back. Harder than it sounds, but good luck.

bankai91 · 2020-12-29T00:19:41+00:00

Modern women AIN'T SHIT. Literally worthless. Don't over invest and just have fun.

Ensifror · 2020-12-28T18:40:20+00:00

When you get angry, it's time to take a break from LTRs. Just spin plates for a few months and relax. Then rethink whether you want to risk another LTR. When you do, don't bring expectations to the relationship. Let the rare few girls pleasantly surprise you rather than the other way around.

doloboi · 2020-12-28T20:57:01+00:00

I’m sorry you feel that way man. I feel the same way. Not sure what the solution is. Dating seems to suck these days. Sure you can spin plates, focus on yourself, and just not give a fuck, but there’s also the part of you that wants something meaningful. It’s part of being a human. It seems as if the human desire of love cannot be fulfilled in this current society. Morals and character are degrading more and more.

We are at a point where we must dramatically focus on ourselves as individuals and any kind of co-dependency doesn’t work. Not sure how all this shit will turn out in the long run but it’s better than suffering because of false expectations of others. So yeah I hate to echo everyone else’s advice, but you kind of have to give yourself the love that you’re wanting from others.. cause you aren’t going to get it from a woman. Investing in so many failed relationships is a drag and drains you in the end.

amrit21chandi · 2020-12-28T21:01:11+00:00

There's no point in staying on a sinking ship. Take this as an opportunity to improve yourself. Also, for serious committed relationship/marriage askMRP subreddit is a better source of information. its basically TRP on hard mode but they'll first tear you a new one and then you might find tools to rebuild yourself. But YOU have to FIND it for YOURSELF.

warrior_up · 2020-12-28T21:08:30+00:00

you had to learn eventually.....my lesson was an expensive one so be glad you gained the knowledge before it was too late

MOSFETBJT · 2020-12-28T21:20:42+00:00

Dude I’m glad you had the nuts to do this. Just stop wasting any time even thinking about her and move on with your life. She’s in the past. You can do breakup sex, I’m always an advocate for that but be sure to wrap it.

Carbone · 2020-12-28T21:52:17+00:00

You just have to filter them. You always find better. I found my current gf after shitty ones. Breaking up is part of the process.

brobeans1320 · 2020-12-28T21:57:07+00:00

As others have said, stop dating to marry.

If you have problems with attachment, take a step back and focus on what makes you happy: hobbies, learning, etc. Dating should be fun.

SeasonedRP · 2020-12-28T22:16:08+00:00

You should feel good about yourself for having the self respect to make the right decision. The feeling down part will go away with time.

empatheticapathetic · 2020-12-28T23:17:32+00:00

You’re alive, healthy, red pill aware and can compete in the marketplace. You only get one shot at this life thing, enjoy it.

fretty555 · 2020-12-28T23:50:06+00:00

Something that might help you here is that women don't think in the same ways that we do. They're largely not aware of the things they do nor how it will impact others, they are largely solipsistic. The faster you realize that they don't value the same things we do the easier it will be for you. Just try not to take these things as personal insults and just accept that this is how women behave and there's not much you can do about it, simply take care of yourself.

thatalexfellah · 2020-12-29T01:50:12+00:00

Walk away bro and don’t turn back that’s all I can say I done that 3 months ago and I now have a foam ration of 4 submissive bitches

SoSmoooth · 2020-12-29T02:32:25+00:00

Dude, I've been through this too many times. Especially the breaking up with someone who still loves you because you "know" you have to whether or not you really don't want to and then dealing with those emotional precautions because in reality, the relationship didn't need to end today if you didn't know the larger truths of the RedPill.

A lot of advice will be curt and apathetic. Which is fine and true. Some will be 17-year-olds who like to swear and call people a pussy, that will be fine to. But some will be genuine and make sense to you. And that's what you have to hone in on. For me, I've always appreciated the quote "the past doesn't concern me," and that's what this girl now is, your past. She wasn't going to be the one you marry, how could she be after what you've seen? Let's do some forecasting, on one side you spent 10 more years with her and she betrayed you or broke up with you and you wasted all that time a relationship demands. On the other, you're 10 years from today and you gained back all that time to focus and build yourself.

For your question "how do I stop having oneitis?" People will say spin plates and abundance. Didn't work for me, I always found one plate that seemed just a little bit better. For me, it's knowing I'm on a time bomb. I have a three-month window with a girl before I know it could get ugly. Then, I simply cut it off then. It hurts sure, but nowhere as bad as a year or two of commitment would. And at that point, I've already seen enough flags to know LTD isn't an option.

Vet early, vet often, and walk early.

pukima_sial · 2020-12-29T05:05:13+00:00

Read the sidebar

KingTrey7 · 2020-12-29T07:52:50+00:00

Some ways to limit/eliminate oneitis are to always talk to multiple women and never give one woman more attention or view her a higher than the others, and make sure you limit your time with the women you deal with. Also, find something like a hobby that you love more than women and invest more time into that. Personally for me, just reminding myself of female nature and seeing how things are happening in the world around me help to discourage me from getting stuck in oneitis.

Snowboard18 · 2020-12-31T19:43:38+00:00

If she’s doing this, she doesn’t respect you.

And if she doesn’t respect you, she isn’t that attracted to you.

I’d say break up with her and fix this issue. Spin plates or fwb and learn how to gain respect

I’ve heard this here before, “if your her top option then it will not be hard to tell, she will be all over you and will have a great desire to please you”

Vizard47 · 2020-12-28T10:45:40+00:00

No one can help you,you either accept it and ascend or refuse it and stay a chump

midgetpooooo · 2020-12-28T18:58:32+00:00

Instead of breaking up with her, let her think it was her idea. Here's what ya gotta do: next time you're smashing and you're about to cum, you scream out "HERE COMES THE GOOK, HÑNG!! 😱" This will subconsciously make her immediately unattracted to you and it'll work itself out over time. Repeat as necessary.

AllocNeighley · 2020-12-28T14:56:44+00:00

I'm talking and flirting with someone's girlfriend. What ya gonna do 'bout it

Title	I am getting tired..
Author	SlowMotionEarthquake
Upvotes	128
Comments	84
Date	December 28, 2020 10:33 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/klo59n/i_am_getting_tired/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/i-am-getting-tired.340988 https://theredarchive.com/post/340988

5 is a home run, god it’s nice to just enjoy “me time”.