TL;DR: -- Read the post you lazy fuck, it isn’t that long.
Most of the people visit this sub to learn how to get better with girls, but for me this sub is about becoming better as a man. To improve as a man, you need to start actually doing stuff instead of mentally masturbating on the internet. You need to build yourself up as a man, and you need habits to do that. For some people, a habit can be built through sheer willpower, but for some people that are used to the “high-dopamine, short attention span, play Fortnite everyday” type of lifestyle, it is difficult. There is a way to make building habits enjoyable. People normally look at a way too large goal and will start off extremely dedicated, but when they notice they aren’t making progress as fast as they would like to, they quit. This is very common among the New-Year’s resolution goals.
Set smaller goals
The secret behind building habits is setting smaller goals. Want to learn how to meditate for 30 minutes every day? Start out with meditating for 1 minute a day for a week, then 2, then 5, etcetera. Building habits isn’t about reaching your end goal immediately, it is about engraining doing that one thing you want to achieve every day.
Now, for some people, setting smaller goals will be enough to actually start achieving something, but there is a tool that you can use to actually feel good during the process as well. It is the tool that got me from a lazy gamer to meditating every day for a year straight. I will explain how it works and what you need.
All you need is a piece of paper and a pen. That’s right. For the price of less than a buck you can build a lifelong habit. You grab a piece of paper and write down the habit you want to build. Let’s grab lifting as an example. You write down ‘Lifting’ in the middle of the piece of paper and write the benefits of consistently lifting around it. It should look something like this. You can add as many benefits as you want, I like to keep going until I really feel passion for learning the habit. When you have done this, flip the paper and make 49 squares on the piece of paper, like this. Now, the one thing that will transform this piece of paper and feel-good bullshit is doing the thing you want to achieve. With lifting for example, every time you hit the gym, you draw a big, fat, satisfying cross in one of the boxes. Let’s say you want to hit the gym 5-times a week, that means you must at least have 5 x’es per row. You must NEVER miss a session if you actually want to build the habit. The only exception is if you either break your whole body or if you fucking die. Let’s say you pussy out and actually miss a cross. Well, you don’t stop going. You continue your journey like it never happened. Make sure to keep the train going, because if you start skipping workouts, it won’t work. Here’s an example of a filled out card. Every X will remind you of a step closer to your goal.
If there is a day where you really don’t feel like doing it, flip the card and read every benefit you’re doing it for. The energy will start rushing through you and you will do it nevertheless.
This whole technique is called the x-effect and it helped me implement a couple of habits into my life, such as meditation. This isn’t a magic trick or a shortcut, it will just make the journey more enjoyable. You won’t believe the satisfaction when you have a card full of crosses. You can do multiple cards at a time, but I advise to start out with just one so you don’t overwhelm yourself.
Give it a try, but don’t expect magic. In the in the end, you have to do it yourself.
Now get to work