My very attractive female friend asked it I would go to dinner with her when she was visiting friends in town. She moved away for work.

"I just don't get it," she said, "I just can't seem to get a good man."

"Oh?"

"I meet them, we date, they leave. Or they don't make a move or... I don't know."

"What are you looking for in a guy?"

"I don't know... Someone tall, at least as attractive as me... Makes about the same that I make. Has his shit together"

"A guy that has it all."

"What's wrong with that?"

"Hmm"

"So... Come on... You're a guy, why didn't you make a move on me?"

"Okay... Are you sure you want the answer?"

"Yes"

"... For one, you're out of my league and you've said before you want a hot tall guy, I'm not those things. But that's not why. you turn every conversation into a competition, you're a poor loser and a poor winner, you are 35 years old, live alone with a cat, drink with "friends" every Friday, drink alone when not with your friends, and yet... You're attractive. You're a middle aged attractive woman that is single... All of those are red flags. Also you make over 100k a year and have a PhD. You want a guy that earns the same or more than you, but if a guy earns over 100k would he want to date a 35 year old woman covered in red flags or younger woman?"

She then leaned back on her side of the booth and shook her head in silence. "Thank you," she said, "you told me the truth. You told me the fucking truth."

"You asked."

The next half hour was spent with her asking why I was single, why I didn't find someone. I told her the truth again, many of the things we talk about here - divorce rape, infidelity, and then the carousel."

"So... Me, basically."

"... Yeah..."

We ended with a terse hug and went our separate ways. I haven't heard from her since.