What is the point of buying a house/ having kids with someone you're not marrying?

XtoDoubt · 2020-04-18T19:30:34+00:00

If both people are working jobs with relatively close pay, it's actually a tax penalty to be married. For a man who earns significantly more than his wife, it's all financial downside when she divorce rapes you. I would get a private marriage, but never a legal one, again.

Barely-moral · 2020-04-18T19:53:29+00:00

I am not interested in the having kids part but I did the house thing.

I am opposed to marriage for two reasons.

The first one is that it creates a perverse incentive structure that rewards one of the partners for leaving the relationship because they get half of everything. Usually the woman makes less money than the man so she has an incentive to leave when things get rough.

The second reason is because for now I haven't met a woman that brings enough value to my life that it is worth the risk of losing half of everything I own and everything I will ever make.

That being said I still value having a LTR and the things that come with marriage or used to come with marriage (except for the incentive structure mentioned above) so everything I can get while inside a LTR I will.

WIA20XX · 2020-04-18T19:52:03+00:00

Asset protection

SartreK · 2020-04-18T20:54:06+00:00

The question is based on the delusional implied assumption that being married would in any way provide added security. The proportion of marriages ending in divorces is enormous.

There are more non-married stable and happy for-life LTRs than lasting marriages nowadays. LTR is term that doesn't say much by itself. It's whatever a couple wants and agrees it to be. Given the divorce laws and numbers, the main difference is rather whether people decide to let the state set the terms of their relationship… or whether they prefer to agree on terms they jointly choose themselves.

reluctantly_red · 2020-04-18T22:52:44+00:00

Couples in Europe and Canada start families without a marriage license all the time.

goatismycopilot · 2020-04-18T21:04:16+00:00

No idea it seems dumb as fuck to me.

mangolover97 · 2020-04-18T19:32:17+00:00

There’s no point. If you’re anti-marriage because of the legal and financial risks, a mortgage and kids still pose as risks. So it’s better to just avoid it all if that’s your mindset.

Some people still want kids and a relationship though. So they’ll play house, because not many people would be ok with co-parenting and dating while living apart.

the-lone-squid · 2020-04-18T22:04:14+00:00

What's the point of getting married if you can just get divorced?

Most Americans aren't marriage material. Most co habitating couples had a surprise baby tho

TomahawkSuppository · 2020-04-18T22:22:54+00:00

It’s dumb to intertwine your financial life with anyone.

bonusfruit · 2020-04-18T23:35:02+00:00

Legal and financial risks for men are to great. Still might want kids and definitely still need a place to live though

2020-04-19T08:43:09+00:00

Because marriage is a piece of paper that doesn't mean anything.

Pastelitomaracucho · 2020-04-18T19:31:00+00:00

Divorce rape :)

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GennyX · 2020-04-19T01:42:31+00:00

There are no government benefits of marriage in some countries.

2020-04-19T04:51:08+00:00

I never understood that either. So... there's that.

My guess is that it makes a lot of sense to them, but if a couple like that were to explain it to you and me, we would not understand.

richlad · 2020-04-19T08:07:32+00:00

Single mother gets government benefits, what's difficult to understand there?

TechnicalMight0 · 2020-04-19T08:23:51+00:00

It depends on your local laws.

DXBrigade · 2020-04-19T15:43:39+00:00

Some people just Don't care. My parents never got married.

Workaholiconew · 2020-06-18T06:39:59+00:00

Taxes. (some jurisdictions, like in portugal)
Government assistance (some jurisdictions, like in portugal)
Financial protection (no divorce laws/other laws for marriage which screw men)
Ease of separation (by the legal system).
Costs of marriage/divorce (a house and a kid can be cheaper than someone's marriages and subsequent divorce)
The end of marriage tradition. (Self explanatory)
It is just a piece of papeer

Title	What is the point of buying a house/ having kids with someone you're not marrying?
Author	KickKathleeenKennedy
Upvotes	7
Comments	63
Date	April 18, 2020 4:26 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/g3q9z3/what_is_the_point_of_buying_a_house_having_kids/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/what-is-the-point-of-buying-a-house-having-kids.654018 https://theredarchive.com/post/654018

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