Somehow, all of a sudden, I'm getting ignored by my friends, rejected by girls and so on...
I've been experiencing successive existential crises and I'm stuck in a nihilistic mindset.
I don't even find why the fuck I would do more self improvement anymore.
I don't find joy in things i do anymore, I still lift, play guitar, etc... but I do it because I have nothing else to do.
I have became so needy and desperate.
I never expected this, but I've been contemplating suicide lately: I'd take my car in the highway and run super fast, not giving a fuck about my life: I think this is the only thing that still makes me happy, I like that feeling and driving fast.
I can't stop thinking about life and how absurd it is, how fake people all around are, how random events are, how unfair human nature is...
I honestly don't know how to move on, it sucks so hard to be me in this situation. I really hope I'd get some help because I don't want to regret my current actions.
Funny how few weeks ago I was all hyped about getting pussy and becoming the best version of myself, and all of a sudden I became invisible, rejected by society, I find no purpose anymore.
And yeah, my post screams depression, I noticed that too.
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