In my years here, I keep seeing dudes in the intermediate grinding stage screw up initiations over and over by stepping on their own dick in the final stages of initiation. They do not set themselves up to succeed with an initiation in the first place by using humor as an ego shield that allows them not to hurt their fee-fees. They are afraid of failure because that would hurt.

It's not funny.

Here's the gist of WHY you do it, up to you if you want to change.

I want to use a simple example that you can understand.

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It's summer, and you just finished doing some yard work and you're covered in sweat. You come inside for a glass of water and your wife is standing there - and you catch her eyes staring at you for a moment. She sheepishly looks away, and you laugh to yourself. Suddenly, your dick starts to get hard and you think about fucking her right there in the kitchen, bending her over the table, covering her in your sweat as you fuck her from behind.

The option you always choose is this: You laugh at her from across the room and yell, "Oh yeah babe, checking me out? Why don't you come on over here and let me rub this hot nasty grass covered sweaty body all over you!" She laughs, you laugh. Day goes on.

The option you never choose is this: You walk across the room and grab her by both arms near her shoulders, spin her around facing away from you - your grip firm as you pull her ear to your mouth: "Bend over. I'm going to rub my fucking sweat all over you."

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The reason that you always choose the first option is because you give yourself the covert option of non-failure. If she fucks you? You win (validation). If she doesn't? Well it was a JOKE! lolz, haha, I was just kidding babe! But deep down? You're hoping, praying, but never really expecting that she will dart across that room to fuck you and satisfy your validation. If she does? Well that means she wants you. Right? And did you really risk anything at all except her not laughing at your joke? No.

The reason you never choose the second option is because it forces you into a binary set of results. Your initiation will be successful, or it won't. Sure - you've probably done this before... but I guarantee that you've never truly been vulnerable in that moment. You don't want to fail because that hurts your little ego and allows you to hide behind that shield instead of feeling the full brunt of rejection and failure.

Instead you use humor to shield against that paper-thin frame of yours. Full of ego and scared like a little pussy of being hurt.

Want to know what's even more retarded? The woman you're trying to fuck is probably not attracted to you - so all your humorous attempts or joking about sex just turns her off and makes her cringe when she once again realizes you're a thirsty beta fuck who doesn't know how to initiate like a man. It's unattractive. Only Chad gets to be sexually crass, because he's a guy who fucks. She knows it, he knows it. In fact, his little jokes about her being a slut who's going to lick the sweat out of his asshole later makes her pussy wet. Why? Because they both know it's actually going to happen. He is attractive.

Men who want things take risks. They push boundaries and are unwilling to let their fear drive their decisions. If you want to fuck your wife, you have to initiate like a MAN would. A man who wants and desires to stick his dick in a woman, right then, isn't joking around.

If you want something, don't go after it like a boy who half-heartedly went out for the football team. If you want it, half-reps don't count. If you want to fuck, you must be a man who strongly desires to fuck in all parts of him - and DNGAF of the outcome. Pussy is plentiful. Jokes are too. But until you're taking that pussy on the regular and it's yours, it's not funny.

Each time you take this non-committal action of initiation and it fails, the more and more unattractive you become to your woman. She sees a little boy, afraid of going for what he wants with both woman and the world, and it absolutely fucking disgusts her. The sexual attraction, if there ever was any, dies each time your humorous initiations fail - which they always do in this stage of unfucking yourself with MRP. You're acting like a little pussy and it's not sexy.

Take a look at the actions of the same guys outside of initiations, and you'll see this same mask used in many parts of their lives. Shielding yourself from failure rarely results in success. Put your fucking gusto into it. All of you. At least you know where you stand.

In the spirit of trading notes, women also fuck up with humor (note: no surprise she is short and fat). But sometimes words aren't required at all.

So a note for you, bro: Next time just stare at her tits, her pussy, or her ass. Think of it as the 10 second kiss with your eyes. Whatever your favorite part of that woman's body is that makes your dick hard. Her collarbone and neck? That shit makes me hard. Stare. Take it all in and don't look away like a beta fuck. At that very moment, there is no other person on this planet that wants to ravish her body like you. Can you communicate that with your eyes? You want her? Do you want to fuck her? She's going to say something to you when she notices your stare and when she does, don't be ashamed. You want it. STFU. Then walk up to her.

Smile, slapass, walkaway.

Now that's fun. And funny.

Who's the prize?