Painful to watch. A true HVM will pursue you with respect and the right intentions. You’ll never have to wonder where you stand with an HVM because he’ll always remind you and he’ll actually ask you at the right time to be his girlfriend.

Mountain_Nectarine_6 · 2020-11-16T16:06:51+00:00

6 months?!!?? She has the patience of a monk. I could never wait 6 months.

Men know in 6 months if they want to MARRY you, and they know within 6 dates if they actually want to date you and be your boyfriend.

Hell to the no! Agreed that this was painful to watch.

The man should and will bring up the DTR talk if he truly likes you and wants to be with you and pursue you. You will not have to do any chasing.

matte_personality · 2020-11-16T15:23:02+00:00

I worry for the example some of the pickmeishas set for young girls on Tik Tok who are naive and full of hope for the jerks that they want to be with. At that age you just love blindly and with all of you without properly vetting and the glorification of men doing the bare minimum just isn’t it.

sassyheather · 2020-11-16T15:46:41+00:00

I never allow someone being called my boyfriend before the official commitment has been made.

People see him this way?

Acquaintances assume I'm his girlfriend because we kiss?

My friends refer to him as my boyfriend because we are "like a couple already"?

No. I will not keep quiet and giggle, I will respond and explain to anyone how I am no one's girlfriend until properly asked to be. And I may go on dates, hold hands, kiss, but until the guy has asked to be my boyfriend, he won't be called that.

Tell-Me-Whyy · 2020-11-16T15:44:31+00:00

Even then that's pretty vague.... bet that kinda guy will do some shit and turn around and say we were never official or something

Less-Panic · 2020-11-16T16:30:19+00:00

Is that how she asked him to be her fiancé too??

sassyheather · 2020-11-16T15:21:22+00:00

No. No. God no.

I am so happy I was never like that. I always knew clearly where my boyfriend stood, during the courtship phase and since we've been officially boyfriend and girlfriend.

Mountain_Nectarine_6 · 2020-11-16T16:08:17+00:00

Off topic but she has a really pretty chest area. It’s so smooth and acne free! I’ve always wanted to wear shirts like that. She rocks it ❤️❤️ necklace was a nice touch.

chateauduchat · 2020-11-16T15:28:01+00:00

Good lord. Like girl, grow up!!

sassylittlespoon · 2020-11-16T20:24:26+00:00

The only reason a DTR talk would be hard/scary is if you don’t know what he wants. If you don’t know what he wants, he doesn’t want you. It should be crystal clear in his words and actions. If it’s not, it’s time to bounce.

And six months? Child, please.

repurposedschleem · 2020-11-16T15:16:58+00:00

Exactly!

I just had a fifth date with a potential HVM (still vetting obvi but so far so good), and during the date he told me he was deleting his dating apps because he wants to focus on me and “where we’re going.” I told him that while I also want to see where we go, I don’t think I’m going to stop accepting dates until we actually define “where we’re going.”

He said that while he would prefer me to only date him, he understood where I was coming from. He’s asked me on two dates since this conversation — a fancy dinner one night this week and an apparently a day out Saturday that he’s planned and has told me to bring my dog (the most important male in my life).

So we’ll see! Definitely not waiting six months though to get a “girlfriend” title lol

aliengames666 · 2020-11-16T17:43:12+00:00

God forbid you make a man uncomfortable by asking him where you stand in your relationship

2020-11-16T17:18:29+00:00

He approved a name, but that doesn’t mean he changed a mentality. This is the worst advice.

ponchoacademy · 2020-11-16T23:45:33+00:00

If youre confused where you stand in the relationship, its on purpose. If a man is serious about you, he will make sure you know what value you hold in his life.

"what are we? You dont treat me well enough to understand whether or not we're in a relationship, but can I call you my boyfriend?" What?

All he did is agree to a title, it means nothing. if shes wants to be committed to a guy who shes confused about because hes not putting in the effort to be part of a secure relationship, then she'll stick around for anything and nothing.

She probably proposed. Bought the ring and everything. Just moved from the meaningless title of bf to meaningless title of fiance. Cant say Id be shocked if they never make it down the aisle either cause hes keeping his options open or met someone he actually wants to put effort into being in a relationship with.

YeetMyProblems · 2020-11-16T17:21:23+00:00

She had me in the first half, not gonna lie. 🤡

2020-11-16T18:06:52+00:00

Silly manipulation just to trick yourself into feeling better about a guy who isn't clearly your boyfriend. Immature and pointless.

aclick1999 · 2020-11-17T03:51:53+00:00

Yuck. My current partner told me on our first date he only pursues one person at a time. Two weeks later he took me on a weekend away and asked me to be 'official', I traveled across country with him in month five to meet his parents (he met mine month three). We discussed a timeline for moving in together and how we would expect our finances to mesh and responsibilities to evolve in month six. Setting our one year anniversary as an action date for this. I also at this point told him I would under no circumstances live with a boyfriend. He has recently been (what he thinks is slyly) asking questions about what I think of certain jewelry as we quickly approach that year mark. The crap this girl is spewing is acceptable for 16 year olds who aren't even having sex. Not for grown people. Six months you might as well spent in a coma.

FDSxMuffinVSrat · 2020-11-16T19:00:27+00:00

I was wondering why the hell this was posted here until I saw the flair lol

yesmme · 2020-11-17T02:35:54+00:00

I once dated possibly the most asshole fuckboy type of NVM and even HE was like “what are we?” “I want a girlfriend”

Remember that the bar is at “loser who fathers several children from several different women asked to be serious” and move way up from there. If a man isn’t initiating, drop the time waster!

2020-11-16T16:57:13+00:00

SIX whole months?!?! If this guy was really into you, there would be no need to persuade him into being with you.

AnniaT · 2020-11-16T18:23:25+00:00

Somehow the video doesn't play for me after the 19 seconds wtf. What does she say after the "I'm not saying you're marrying this person"?

Left-Requirement9267 · 2022-06-26T10:28:15+00:00

Huh?! Meeting friends but isn’t your offical bf?

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