I am almost certain that my wife is cheating but she doesn’t know that I know while I collect evidences. Anyway, I have decided it’s probable best to legally separate and file for divorce after 13-years married. We live in an equitable state. We have 2 kids, the youngest is 9 and we both work with me earning 2x more than STBXW but she has flex hours and choose to work part time with potential earning $100k if FT. We have joint ownership of our home and 2 other investment properties, all with mortgages. The equity of our primary is about the same as the equity from the 2 investment properties, so I am ok taking the investment and move into one of them have her stay with kids. I have 2-401k, but 1 was from before marriage and we both have 1-401k after marriage and some other retirement funds IRA/Roth and cash. I think I would be happy to split our finances 50/50 but don’t want to end up paying alimony, which in my opinion, a cheater should never be entitled to by law. Child support is ok as long as it’s reasonably and money goes to kids activities.

I will be tuning out the possibilities of crying, forgiveness, lies and blame, etc.

Would be interested to hear about things I can be doing to protect myself before I confront her and one of us needs to move out. If she stay and I move out, would I be expected to pay maintenance to her if she decide not to work more hours to make the mortgage payments on primary property?