Her birthday?

OkJaguar5013 · 2026-03-15T12:10:47+00:00

I wouldn’t do a gift but a letter could potentially hit her hard and accomplish your needs as well. Nothing too declarative, overly verbose or overly sentimental, but could live rent free in her head for a long time. Sounds mutual? Maybe no third party involved?

dday_throwaway3 · 2026-03-13T22:30:31+00:00

Stop. You're getting divorced. The time for gift giving is over. You don't get divorced to remain best friends. You can be civil, but never friends.

Ok-Cause1108 · 2026-03-13T19:25:32+00:00

It's the new guys job to buy her gifts, not yours.

You both didn't decide, she asked for space as she no longer loves you and you agreed hoping to win her back.

Just keeping it real mate. If you keep deluding yourself your heart is going to get ground into dust. Start letting go.

owls_exist · 2026-03-13T18:43:22+00:00

dont be like my retarded EX who gifted his ex wife a benz and then gave me nothing except im not the one that divorced his ass lol we were merely dating. to this day he's still single and i caught wind he's getting rejected left and right on dating apps again. im no ones sucker

Ok-Anything-3605 · 2026-03-13T18:32:06+00:00

I’ll let the kids pick out something for her, but absolutely nothing from me. Apparently that was one of the many stupid reasons she wanted out…expectations of gifts.

probebeta · 2026-03-13T18:18:38+00:00

Nah... Unless you're enjoying the process of selling the house and going through all this hassle :)

IW-6 · 2026-03-13T18:14:23+00:00

If you had a gift in mind and it feels good to just give, do it. Only give something if it feels good for you. I did it months after the divorce was final because I really wanted it to without any strings attached.

psychcaptain · 2026-03-13T17:32:36+00:00

That is tough.

I don't have an answer because it depends on where you both are emotionally.

Tvelt17 · 2026-03-13T17:22:01+00:00

I'm 3.5 years divorced. I still get stuff for the kids to give her on her Birthday, Mother's Day, & Christmas. We get along and co-parent well. She's a great mother to our kids, so I don't see anything wrong with that.

I think the answer is that "it depends" - I don't think its the end of the world if you do get a gift, but I don't think you're necessarily obligated to. Maybe something small and thoughtful.

ImplementNo2413 · 2026-03-13T16:56:34+00:00

Mine was pissed I didn't plan or do anything for her. She left me a week prior.

dystinct · 2026-03-13T15:44:45+00:00

Save your money. I told the kids to make sure they told her happy birthday, but didn't give them money to buy her a gift. I also told them to stop buying me things on holidays.

I-reddit-once · 2026-03-13T15:42:55+00:00

This would be a no for me, but im not sure of your specific situation. Always let them know what they are, or would be missing

Title	Her birthday?
Author	manyaktalaga
Upvotes	2
Comments	20
Date	March 13, 2026 3:37 PM UTC (4 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1rsqoao/her_birthday/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/her-birthday.1575411 https://theredarchive.com/post/1575411

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