Negotiating Extracurricular Activity Limits and Registration Priority in Divorce Agreements Extracurriculars

Striking_Day_9664 · 2026-04-15T17:02:23+00:00

Maybe phrase it like this: no child is enrolled in extracurriculars without prior written agreement from both parents and there’s a defined timeframe for responding. You can also add limits on number of activities and how costs are split.

Federal_Repair1094 · 2026-04-13T19:52:07+00:00

With my ex wife we had a 50/50 of all expenses but I cover family health for the kids while she has individual for herself. I also cover the kids cell phone bills. No child support order since I have her the house without asking to be bought out of my equity.

I paid my 50% of expenses without question as it’s also stipulated that if I don’t contribute my 50% of expenses she can go to family court for child support. So I made sure I paid her back by check or I paid half of transaction online and got a record of my payment.

Then one time, only once, about a year after divorce I paid for something and asked to be reimbursed 50% of cost. The 50% expenses in divorce decree stated it went both way. Our salaries were about $5000 apart and my paying healthcare and paying cell phones made up that difference.

Well anyway my ex went batshit crazy over having to pay half the expense because of our $5000 difference in salary. I did point out it was far less when considering take home pay was probably the same since she could claim the kids and file as head of household.

Of course that response was not taken well

OctinoxateAndZinc · 2026-04-13T16:40:47+00:00

How should I word this, and does anyone have experience with a similar clause in their own agreement?

here, have the whole damn thing lol

Article xxx - EXTRACURRICULAR ACTIVITIES

X.1 The Parents agree that they will be jointly involved in their Minor Children’s extracurricular activities and that, after considering each Minor Child’s aptitudes and preferences, they shall jointly make all decisions relating to the Minor Children’s enrollment and participation in any lessons and extracurricular activities. For purposes of this Agreement, extracurricular activities shall include, but not be limited to lessons, sports, band, and items necessary to be involved in said activity, yearbook fees, field trips, summer camps, and the like. Consent shall not be unreasonably withheld. The parties further agree to the following terms and conditions:

While the parties intend for the children to remain enrolled in any activities in which they are currently enrolled, if the respective child wishes to continue with that activity, the parties shall discuss same before reenrolling the child in said activity.
Each parent shall have the right to schedule individual lessons and extracurricular activities and events for the children during his or her own parenting time, as long as the activity, and related lessons, recitals, games, practices, and the like, do not impact the other’s parenting time in any way.
Each parent will contact the other and obtain the other’s approval prior to scheduling any individual lessons or activities for the children which that parent has reason to believe might occur during or otherwise impact the other’s parenting time; moreover, neither parent will promise or commit the children to any such lessons or activity until the parent whose approval is sought has, in fact, approved.
The parties agree that it is not in the children’s best interests, nor the best interests of the parties, for the children to be "overscheduled." Accordingly, unless otherwise agreed, each child shall be enrolled and participate in no more than two concurrent team/group extracurricular activities or ongoing group lessons per season.
The parties agree and acknowledge that certain team/group activities or lessons in which the children may participate are likely to have practices, games or other scheduled sessions which may fall during both parents’ parenting time. With that understanding, each parent will ensure that the children promptly attend their scheduled activities with the required equipment, supplies, uniforms, and anything else the children need to participate in their activities.
Each parent shall familiarize himself/herself with the children’s lessons and extracurricular activities.
Parents shall divide the cost of any activity in conjunction with the division of expenses outlined in Section X.X.

rdwrer_711 · 2026-04-13T16:30:13+00:00

We agreed to one extra curricular that we are splitting costs related to. Everything else is by agreement and split costs with documentation.

I can just not agree and the costs are up to my wife.

RevolutionaryLaw8854 · 2026-04-13T16:25:36+00:00

“What would you do if you were still married” is pretty much my standard.

And needs to be in writing. Basically it takes 2 “yes” votes for anything to happen. If one parent says no, then the answer is no.

dystinct · 2026-04-13T15:59:49+00:00

Have it written in the agreement. All “current” activities will continue and the costs will be split. All “new” activities will need to be agreed on by both parties.

If one doesn’t agree, and the other does, it will be on them to cover the cost.

EmbarrassedAge7612 · 2026-04-13T15:54:42+00:00

The other things to think about is the other parent not getting them to the activity and practice. If it’s a physical activity like dance or sports, how will injuries be handled. I got stuck paying for a series of surgeries and PT appointments for a leg injury. All for an activity my ex put her in and never once attended or paid for.

Title	Negotiating Extracurricular Activity Limits and Registration Priority in Divorce Agreements Extracurriculars
Author	Final_Minimum1443
Upvotes	3
Comments	13
Date	April 13, 2026 3:30 PM UTC (4 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1skeana/negotiating_extracurricular_activity_limits_and/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/negotiating-extracurricular-activity-limits-and.1577847 https://theredarchive.com/post/1577847

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