I don’t want to be “red-pilled”, but I’ve seen too much and am kinda low-key traumatized (please help me)

imhereforthemeta · 2026-02-16T16:31:31+00:00

With a lot of folks in your position, you mention being a catch in some ways but folks going for tall assholes, however, your current view of woman would be a red flag and probably presents in some other ways in your daily life- possibly without you realizing it.

I’m married, but was in a store the other day and a really fat dude laid some mega smooth lines on me but also treated me like a person and was clearly a put together dude. I walked out of the store telling my friend if I was single I would have asked him on a date because homie was CHARMING. There’s just so many factors that can jumpstart attractiveness to people. If you are wealthy and not finding dates, maybe you aren’t charming or attractive or tall or whatever. You can’t just have one characteristic usually, unless you are mega hot and JUST want a booty call.

You mention you are rich, and to be frank, a lot of short men are in relationships. RICH men unquestionably have a leg up in the dating scene in some ways, which again, leads me to believe it’s not as cut and dry as “I’m short women aren’t attracted to me”.

Feel free to search my comments for confirmation of this but I am mega into short guys and I’m almost 6 feet tall- but I can sniff out a guy with a chip on his shoulder from a mile away.

All this said, it’s time to look inward first. Not about necessarily what you fail at, but how to develop personally because those things are going to affect your life as well as your opportunity to get a partner. There are things like… Are you a happy and fulfilled person? Do you have good hygiene in fashion habits? Do you have friends and healthy relationship relationships? Do you have healthy self-esteem outside of relationship relationships? Do you have hobbies and passions and things that get you up in the morning other than work? If you are wealthy again, that’s a massssssive leg up when dating, especially if you want to date a successful and self motivated woman- but it’s only one piece of the equation. The old cliché is true to an extent, it’s really hard for other people to see you properly if you’re not reflecting the best of yourself or have self fulfillment.

It’s incredibly easy to pass that off as a problem with women, but in your heart, I’m sure you see that there are guys in the world happily married, and such who have far less than you. Being short can be a negative for initial attraction for some women, but it’s not a full barrier and it doesn’t speak to the failures of women. Nobody has a perfect roster of traits to find a partner.

OrchidReverie · 2026-02-16T16:02:48+00:00

You need to unplug. Like purge, unfollow, unsubscrib, and delist everything that reminds you of the content that’s dragging you down. It’s hard to undo all that you’v built but you can rebuild a better network and surround your feed with better stuff in the future. Just say no and slow down. Learn to live in your own skin. It took me about a year to truly unplug after I coughed up the pill. I wanted to return but the less I engaged the more I felt better. Take your time.

xvszero · 2026-02-16T15:56:31+00:00

but they still go for the tall a-holes who literally just pump and dump them

Do they though? Why do you think this is true of women as a population? Honestly almost none of the women I know do that. Maybe you're cruising the wrong circles. Where do you meet women?

I am alone in my penthouse all day just scrolling Reddit

Ok so don't do that. Reddit is cancer.

sunny_side_egg · 2026-02-16T16:37:03+00:00

Being "invisible" when you go out is kinda the norm, but just being out isn't how you meet people. You need to go to stuff that gets you interacting with other people. It can be something like a singles event or some hobby thing like a dance class or rock climbing or some shit. You build a social life. Rocking up to a club in a flashy car will get you attention, but some of it will be from girls who like money and flash cars rather than you, and bed rotting while looking at red pill content will just prevent you from doing anything. You need to make actual connections

Also, I know you were trying to make a point about how you feel you're doing everything right, but I want you to read over your post and count how many times you tell us,both directly and indirectly that you have a lot of money. Like you don't have to mention that you're scrolling Reddit in a penthouse, you already told us you retired yourself and your parents at age 26, and you made millions from your business and have a nice car. If you habitually talk about yourself this way, it maybe part of the problem. Humble bragging will not attract genuine connections

octave120 · 2026-02-16T17:52:04+00:00

Hey, fellow short guy here! I don’t know if I have any advice for you that you haven’t heard already. Just want to send you virtual hugs because I can relate and I know that it’s tough out there. I found love after years of struggling, but I know that we all have different experiences. Hope you find who you’re looking for someday!

Personal_Dirt3089 · 2026-02-17T02:58:08+00:00

Wait, did you say you retired at 24? I do not give millionaires non sarcastic advice usually, but that is a recipe for spiraling into depression. Get a job, get something to go to every day, something you can look at stuff and say "cool, I accomplished something". Not to impress women, but for yourself. It's not even about the money.

Funny_Assignment_105 · 2026-02-16T19:48:58+00:00

How short?

Both short men I have been friends with had no problem getting women. They did however get more shit off other men and both were aggressive when drunk not a good combo.

HelenHavok · 2026-02-16T19:19:00+00:00

I want to say that I’m sorry you’re feeling this way. I am not going to pretend that height doesn’t matter at all in life or dismiss your many negative experiences. I do know at least two longterm hetero couples who have a height disparity - in one the woman is 5’9” and the man is maybe 5’2”, so I know it’s possible.

I am concerned about your mental health, and while it sounds like you’ve taken some good steps to try to find relief, it seems like you’ve sort of given up on them. Being retired at 25 is quite a feat and probably well deserved, but with no job to occupy your time at such a young age and the social exposure and fulfillment a lot of people get from work, I think you need something to replace it with - a new “job” (whatever that looks like for you), volunteering on a regular schedule, hobbies and classes that allow you to meet a lot of different people. Anything that stops you from being bored hanging out alone at home staring at screens is going to be beneficial for your state of mind. More opportunities for socialization are good for making friends and meeting potential partners, but also good for your brain regardless. I would entirely avoid trying to date online or hitting girls up in bars/clubs. Spending time with people in person is always going to be more fruitful. I’d work on building meaningful friendships with people and meeting women through your social, hobby, volunteer, and “work” settings without focusing too much on dating them.

The other option, (which forgive me if you’ve tried), is hiring a professional matchmaker, especially one who deals with clientele of your tax bracket. They’ll be able to connect you with similar driven and successful women.

feeling_inspired · 2026-02-18T15:39:49+00:00

OP, I get where you're coming from. I've been in a similar bog as you. And, I'm out. I'll share some pointers with you that's helped me, that I think would help you too.

What I'm hearing is a lack of meaning. That's what I would address first.

Connect with yourself. Figure out - What are your values?

I found out what my values were in connection with other people. I was a volunteer, and I saw that I was able to make a genuine difference in someone's life. That I cared about something. That something was important to me. That someone's well being was more important to me than preserving my own comfort.

I watch a lot of DnD on Dropout (which I genuinely recommend if you're filling your day to day with slop anyway - again, very relatable). The game master, Brennan Lee Mulligan, talks about how players start out walking carefree and unattached through the world, not thinking about consequences. And then suddenly, there is something they care about. There is something that connects them to the world. There is something that becomes important to them.

Watch this clip of Brennan explaining it

That's what you need in real life too. Something that connects you to the world.

That's why it's important that you engage with the world around you.

There is so much meaning in the world. There are so much worth doing. There is so much worth fighting for. Go connect with the communities in your local area, outside your rich bubble. What are they fighting for? What do they care about? Why? Where can you help? Not just through your money, but you, as a person, showing up.

Cause that's the next step. OP, who are you? I don't mean in terms of status, money, connections, "successes" or achievements. I mean you, as a person. Every single person on earth is unique. We all have so much we share, and we all have areas there we "stick out", "don't fit", and are unique. Who are you? Being short, being loyal, being rich - none of that is about who you are. What makes you uniquely you?

I highly recommend checking out Blindboy's podcast. He's great at finding meaning and connections. Since you're a curious person and like seeing new perspectives, I highly recommend listening to at least a handful of episodes. To start of, listen to this episode where he talks about the struggle to not define his value as a person in external things.

OP, I'm a trans man. I can fully relate to "the toll it takes on a human psyche to be constantly rejected non-stop, and not only that but being viewed with disgust or as a joke (not just) by the opposite sex, for a factor you can’t control." On top of that I'm gay/queer, short, poor, chronically ill, neurodivergent.

There are a lot of things out of my control, that a lot of people view as negatives. Most people. And. There are people who don't. There are people who not only tolerate those parts of me, but genuinely embrace and appreciate them.

Finding those people in our lives who we truly connect with is rare and special. No matter who you are, 99% of the population is not a good match for you. Do not let that overshadow the ones who are. Finding those deep connections is like looking for a needle in a haystack. Don't be upset by all the hay being hay, don't let that define your worth. Focus on the needle. Ya feel me?

DearElise · 2026-03-20T01:14:11+00:00

You lost the genetic lottery. Not going to sugarcoat it. But yes, the way the world treats short men (not just in dating but also in the workplace) is wrong and too normalized.

Which means you’re going to have a much harder time not just figuring out dating but also regulating your identity/self esteem. There are also upsides though, like short men are less likely to be divorced after marriage and they also have more sex. There’s also famous short men who have gotten married and tall women / short men or the “short king” phenomenon is popular these days.

Anecdotally my personal experiences dating short men before I got married was that the ones I dated specifically had hidden insecurities and overwhelming achievements in other areas that they used to cover up. Not saying that this is you, but reading your paragraphs stressing your wealth/business and how you generalized women made me suspect that maybe this is your problem in that you aren’t really secure in yourself. You mentioned priding yourself on being a good partner and honestly that’s probably all you need. I also emphatize because short men probably have to work harder on their sense of self compared to men who get confidence undeservedly.

I agree with the other comments stating to remove yourself from all these negative influences and maybe find a prominent role model that you can use to reference your life. You shouldn’t be showing off your wealth lol, you would attract women not in it for love. Since you have wealth, maybe try a matchmaking service or something where you can speak to the other person blind first?

Gunlord500 · 2026-02-16T15:59:24+00:00

If you have millions, why even care about women at all? So they don't want to have sex with you, might even hold you in contempt. So what? Your life is so good you don't even have to hate them back. Enjoy your money as a wealthy bachelor. Hang out with other respectable guys, do stuff like yachting or whatever, and if sexual validation is so important, get an escort or head on over to Nevada for one of the safe legal brothels there (you can certainly afford it). Life is too good and too short to squander on bitterness.

SylvarGrl · 2026-02-16T20:15:20+00:00

It is a sad reality in this life that the majority of people do not measure up to ideal beauty standards and so find themselves treated harshly and dismissively because of something they lack through no fault of their own. It is an even crueler reality then that the few who do fit the standard are relentlessly objectified and exploited for something that they possess through no virtue of their own, often until such time they no longer possess it—and fall into the first category.

Shellypie8 · 2026-02-18T13:19:11+00:00

I’m sorry it’s been such a tough time for you ! Would you be interested in making a film at all? I feel like you would be the perfect person to throw yourself into a creative project like that! Human relationships can be very disappointing at the best of times unfortunately

Title	I don’t want to be “red-pilled”, but I’ve seen too much and am kinda low-key traumatized (please help me)
Author	tsesarevichalexei
Upvotes	2
Comments	62
Date	February 16, 2026 3:52 PM UTC (5 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/1r6d8ug/i_dont_want_to_be_redpilled_but_ive_seen_too_much/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/i-dont-want-to-be-red-pilled-but-ive-seen-too-much.1573617 https://theredarchive.com/post/1573617

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