Another reason never to date down...

timetofliptables · 2020-02-29T00:04:43+00:00

This is spot on. Some people think abusers only go for easy targets (for lack of a better term though I hate to even put it like that), and some do, but others, especially narcissists, go after what they see as a challenge and a trophy.

99power · 2020-02-29T00:40:13+00:00

Yes. Exposing the abusers

officernice89 · 2020-02-29T03:33:31+00:00

my ex narc, before i finally dismissed him out my life, when we broke up before i really ended things, he wouldn’t tell his family we were broken up.

he said to me “my brother asked about you, i didn’t tell him we broke up.”, because not only was he embarrassed about ‘being alone’, but also because he had broken me down so much and he knew he had me so manipulated by exploiting my good qualities that he never thought he’d lose me for good despite how awful he treated me.

Dolphin_Moon · 2020-02-29T05:06:53+00:00

My ex called me a slut and a whore all the time saying how “I’m too easy” and “am always in a mood”. He now tweets about how much he misses me and how he has a “big heart”. Still a year later and I sometimes have to remind myself I’m not a whore for wanting to have sex

aclumsygirl · 2020-02-29T02:31:56+00:00

Even non-narc LVMs do this. They like catching someone above their league, but then their insecurities kick in and they can't handle being with someone they're so afraid of losing to a better guy.

kiki03wtr · 2020-02-29T02:28:04+00:00

This describes my ex to a T.

TaylaBlaze · 2020-02-29T01:51:13+00:00

[deleted]

Cytrinex · 2020-02-29T02:39:30+00:00

Oh shit, you just put a tonne of stuff relating to an ex of mine into perspective. Yuck yuck yuck....

Thank you once again, FDS ❤️

redfarmmmmm · 2020-02-29T10:05:40+00:00

People who constantly criticizes others, it’s proven psychologically that in truth, they’re the ones who have low self esteem. They’re the one with the issues and that’s why they project their insecurities to others.

galian84 · 2020-02-29T05:00:19+00:00

Can attest to this as well, 100%. This was the last guy I dated.

Ms_Tilly · 2020-02-29T03:56:31+00:00

This is probably why that ugly af narcissist I fell for would randomly text "why are YOU with me? I don't trust your judgment because of it." Talk about a weird text that I had to actually think on. Is it negging? Is it low self esteem? Is it both? LOL I told him to fuck off every time he tried that weird shit and he would apologize and disappear for a couple days and then re-apologize. He probably still thinks he has a chance with a woman at my level just because he fooled me. Nah bro, I was just giving an ugly guy a chance and I'm an Anglophile.

redbirdflies · 2020-02-29T01:03:58+00:00

Accurate. Can confirm

cactus_blossm · 2020-02-29T18:29:15+00:00

One of the biggest lessons I’ve learned recently is that men with low self esteem can be narcissists too. These sad sacks of shit need to put down women, esp HVW women who are completely out of their league, to make them feel better about themselves 🤮

ElegantCategory · 2020-02-29T10:50:48+00:00

Needed to hear this after my narc ex broke up with me after 2.5 months of dating. I had already prepared myself to break up with him but he beat me to it. I ain't even mad. He did me a favour. I always knew deep down that I was settling. NEVER AGAIN.

itsvkee · 2020-02-29T10:57:43+00:00

This was my ex to a T. Paraded me around like an ornament to everyone he knew. Yet couldn’t handle the fact that I had opinions and wanted to live my own life and that my world didn’t revolve around him 🙄 better off without him.

2020-02-29T11:29:21+00:00

I've had it both ways, I've dated a man who was so sure I was out of is league (that I was) that he treated me like a princess. I also had a man who knew I was too good for him so he did all of the above while maintaining a cool facade when we were out with friends or when he talked about me with other people. At the end this relationship got so toxic, he badmouthed me to anyone who was willing to listen. all the talks I've had with him trying to make him aware of this behavior before it got really bad and ended, was used after we had broke up on the next lady he dated. But she dumped him pretty quickly even though he tried his best to not repeat these mistakes, I guess that's karma for y'all.

Hadasfromhades · 2020-02-29T11:09:22+00:00

My ex boyfriend from college thought I was better than him, I didn’t, but the fact that he thought so was enough. Initially I thought it was cute when he said I was settling for him, but it caused so much trouble. He kept making me feel bad over stuff I didn’t know from classes I didn’t yet take, for wanting to dress nice, etc. Eventually we broke up because he couldn’t stop wondering whether he could get better than me. And I was his first relationship at the age of 25! He was willing to risk that because “ever since we started dating everyone looks so hot”. Ugh.

HWR3057 · 2020-03-02T17:16:37+00:00

So that’s why my ex said he was embarrassed to be seen with me

Title	Another reason never to date down...
Author	CuriousCatNYC777
Upvotes	630
Comments	41
Date	February 28, 2020 11:26 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/fb3jtw/another_reason_never_to_date_down/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/another-reason-never-to-date-down.681293 https://theredarchive.com/post/681293

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