Yesterday while practicing social distancing with my family, we decided to google cast my sister's phone screen to our TV so that my husband and I, my mother, and my brother could collectively weigh in on her Bumble options.

So we were all judging and roasting away and it was fun for us young'uns, but my mother was in complete shock by how old everyone looked. The age range was 25-35 and most of these guys looked like they were in their 40s. She kept asking "Are they all lying? Or do they actually look that bad? Why is this guy 35 and looking for casual dating when he looks like he has one foot in the grave? Why isn't he married or at least looking? What's going on?"

The thing is... I don't think they were all lying.

That's just what you get when you have no idea how to take care of yourself, spend your 20s drinking with your boys, doing drugs, getting 3 hours of sleep a night on a mattress on the floor with no fitted sheet cause you are too busy getting a false sense of accomplishment from video games, and trying to get the most from women for the least investment - in the end, when the women wise up and leave, it's these dudes who are actually left with nothing.