Girlfriend makes me feel bad because she gets mad at me for half-assing chores! Also, I’m 32yo.

SimpleSyrups · 2020-01-27T18:18:17+00:00

Literally in the first paragraph he says he shouldn’t have to do things because he doesn’t care about them. I hope she runs for the hills.

“I cheated because I didn’t care about monogamy. I don’t know why I’m being held to some kind of standard when I don’t care about the standard.”

dopesoaprope · 2020-01-27T18:44:49+00:00

These types of guys think cleaning is a big chore because they make it one.

I just microwaved a breakfast burrito, and in the minute I was waiting for the microwave to ding, I wiped off my stove and a counter. It wasn't that dirty anyway, but now it's clean.

If you half ass things and leave them for a week, yeah, cleaning is going to be a big chore.

I think the worst thing about this guy is his piss poor attitude...

timetofliptables · 2020-01-27T18:36:13+00:00

Thank god everyone is tearing him a new one. Yikes.

Hampered-Siren · 2020-01-27T21:02:39+00:00

His next post will be in Dead Bedrooms.

This is why I will probably never live with a man again. There is nothing more disgusting than a lazy, entitled man child.

They really don't care because they know if they half-ass it and ignore it we will do it.

What is the point of living with someone if they make your life harder? Shouldn't they be doing everything they can to make your life easier?

Oh this post just makes me see red! I hope she boots his azz!

Nifteroni-and-Cheese · 2020-01-27T21:04:12+00:00

When you’re at a guys place, check out how clean the spaces he doesn’t show you are. Under his bed, in his closet, the cabinet under the sink, his dresser drawers, ect. That’s how neat he actually is, the rest of his place is how neat he’s willing to pretend to be.

Like don’t be obvious, this isn’t a home inspection, but like, if he has dirty laundry stuffed under his bed, that’s a problem.

Bonus story: one time I lost my phone in the couch at a guys place, lifted up the cushion, and found about a million goldfish that had fallen in and never been cleaned up.

Barnabas1993 · 2020-01-27T20:16:09+00:00

Yeah, I read the first paragraph as well and was disgusted. How do people like him ever get a girlfriend in the first place? It’s just unbelievable that people accept this kind of behavior. Fuck him and dump his ass.

siberiansummer · 2020-01-27T21:14:38+00:00

He probably doesn’t wash his hands after shitting and handling his ding dong. Men are notorious for that shit anyway. Oh!! And I saw a red-pilled scrote on YouTube over the weekend claiming one of regular (!) men’s habits is to piss in the sink (!!!) And all these males were agreeing with him in comments 🤢

grunge-witch · 2020-01-27T20:50:22+00:00

That's either a post made by the angry fed-up girlfriend so she could show him, or that man is the most oblivious, self-centered idiot I've ever encountered. The whole thing was so ridiculous, it read like satire!

saxophonepax · 2020-01-27T18:39:41+00:00

He is ridiculous. After buying my own place and renting my spare room to a Lodger who was also half-assed with keeping the house clean...I have come to the conclusion that unless someone has invested in a home or can see that not looking after it will cost them dearly then they don't care. My Lodger didn't care to wipe water from the counter because it's not her place. This guy says he moved into her place after living with roommates. He isn't invested in the place. He sees no need to keep it clean. Regardless, his attitude STINKS and that alone is the reason I would be advising his poor girlfriend to dump him and give him notice to leave.

Edit: my Lodger only cared about the level of her cleanliness when she moved out and I deducted from her deposit for cleaning costs. She had even had the audacity to leave the room she rented unhoovered or mopped. Left my plates and cups badly washed and crusted with oats. Bits of food stuck in the sink. Then had the gall to get upset when I told her I was taking money out and sent me a lengthy email about how I was being "nonsensical". Some people don't care about house-keeping until you hit them where it hurts and that's usually financially.

azngirl7689 · 2020-01-27T21:38:05+00:00

Why are men trash?

randomgirlimok · 2020-01-28T01:03:42+00:00

I will never again date a guy who doesn’t live on his own. My ex also lived with his parents and then a roommate so I never got to see who was actually doing the cleaning (it was the roommates girlfriend). So unless you can see how clean they keep their own place I wouldn’t risk moving in with them.

SextMex · 2020-01-27T21:51:33+00:00

[deleted]

ivy176 · 2020-01-28T05:01:47+00:00

That is sooo unacceptable.

I'm a 12 year veteran of having to deal with that shit. Boy have I been there and done that, plus so much more.

Here's my response to him:

YTA. Half assed "cleaning" like pushing crumbs behind objects is how you end up with ants, cockroaches or mice. So in that regard, there is a right or wrong and you are in the wrong.

It also says a lot about a person's general character. If you literally sweep things under the rug then that will extend into other parts of your life. You'll be generally less responsible and more lazy than other men who just automatically do a task well.

Arguing over semantics when you agreed to clean up after she cooks by saying the stove/counters aren't "the dishes" is also a manipulative character trait. I do not date men who argue semantics. It's avoidance of the real issues and it's childish and twisty. It shows how a man will act during big arguments too.

Also, your attitude towards not cleaning behind things or the tiles or the floor, shows that you were used to having somebody fix all of that up for you. These things don't magically fix themselves, so you half assing it daily would lead to a massive pile up of work. Girlfriend and probably other girlfriends or mommy in the past were then forced to do even more work if they want a house that's actually clean and free of debris that attract pests. That's called putting physical and emotional labour on people.

I completely agree with your girlfriend and it would be a big no for me. I would not date someone with that kind of negative attitude. It's bad enough to have to do most of the work, but it signifies a deeper character issue that will infiltrate all areas of your life if you stay with the person.

That's the cold hard truth, so you either have to decide you want to be this type of person and accept that you cannot be enough for her in a relationship and step off instead of trying to convince her that her basic standards are wrong, or actually acknowledge what it really is, acknowledge that it's lazy and irresponsible and not okay, not just "how some people are", and CHANGE YOUR WAYS if a life with her really matters to you.

I guarantee if you commit to changing this long term, you will see your relationship improve 20 fold and you will lose this shitty destructive mom/child dynamic that's growing at a rapid pace. If not, the relationship will not last.

A man who doesn't do tasks well, on his own accord and without nagging, signifies a man who fails to run his own life at a good standard, who fails to be a good partner, and would not make a good husband or father. It demonstrates immaturity and irresponsibility. It's not just a few crumbs. It's a few crumbs to you because you're not the one fixing it all up and bringing it up to standard with all your effort.

Don't make her nag you or you will lose her. She doesn't want to nag you, she hates nagging you. She wants you to step up and be her life partner. You're showing her over time that you can't. It's up to you from here. You're only fighting against growing up and taking responsibility. It doesn't have to be 100% her way, but from what you've said it's very clear that your way is extremely sub par to mature adults. Don't make her live like that if you care about her.

SanniCat123 · 2020-01-27T21:13:13+00:00

My partner understands the importance of cleanliness to me & as he pays all the bills , ect, i dont get on his ass too much but he at least admits theyre all habits that he needs to change when i mention that itd take him a few seconds to rinse his dishes/put them in the dish washer/wipe up after him self. God i hope she LEAVES him! This is why I don't belive in 50/50. A lot of woman wont pay bills,cook, or clean, he has no idea how "GoOd" he has it!

Girlfriend makes me feel bad because she gets mad at me for half-assing chores! Also, I’m 32yo.

Comments

2. Guys with dirty toilets

Title	Girlfriend makes me feel bad because she gets mad at me for half-assing chores! Also, I’m 32yo.
Author	EmergencyShit
Upvotes	124
Comments	38
Date	January 27, 2020 6:02 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/eurmnz/girlfriend_makes_me_feel_bad_because_she_gets_mad/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/girlfriend-makes-me-feel-bad-because-she-gets-mad.683879 https://theredarchive.com/post/683879