So I'm actively upset right now and just need your ladie's feedback. I feel a little fucking crazy, honestly. Like I'm overreacting, even though I know I'm not.
I have a nice job in a government facility. You literally need to have an issued badge to get into this area. I get to work at roughly the same time every day, which means I park in the parking garage roughly in the same exact spot every day. I change into my gym clothes before leaving work, and because of my tattoos I'm easily identifiable.
So I'm speed walking off the elevators over to my car with all my bags, and as I'm walking out of the elevator area I notice a car to the left is on and someone's in it. Okay fine, whatever. I unlock my car that's maybe 30ft away, get all my shit in and put my gym music on and roll down the windows because it's nice out and I'm vibing. As I'm reversing and starting to drive back towards the elevators (I always go up a different route, down this route. Every day) the car that was on flashes its lights, and I thought oh that's weird. I start driving towards it, because I literally have to, and I brake to make the turn and a man gets out of the car and waves me down. Like, the BIG wave. I stop my car and turned the music down, and he said "I've seen you walk in and I've been wanting to ask you where you got your work done, and if any of it's local." I told him the shop I've gone to, the shop a best friend and my partner have gone to, but that I don't know anything outside of specific city. He said he appreciated it, repeated the names of them, and then proceeded to ask me what my name was, and then how he'd take me out to lunch or a beer sometime. I said sure because I'm fucking stupid and was so caught off guard by all of it and just wanted to get the fuck away. I tried starting to drive off multiple times and he stopped me by continuing to talk, suggested we could just go right now. I ended up giving him my work place contact (it's like a name abbreviation, you can search people by using it) and he repeated it incorrectly and I left.
I did my workout, and as soon as I got to my car I started crying. I've cried a few times on and off since then. I feel so upset for so many different reasons, but most of all I feel disappointed in myself. So many men have used my tattoos as a way to start a conversation with me that ultimately was never about the tattoos in the first place. It should be a red flag by now but every single time I just engage because....I don't know. I'm fucking gullible. I'm still falling for this shit.
I'm entirely certain this guy was waiting for me. It was far too calculated to be a "I saw you walk in" and then I happened to walk out 8 hours later. I'm not going to straight up say he stalked me, but......that was far too convenient. And I'm far too consistent with my actions. So if it talks like a stalker and stops you from leaving the parking garage like a stalker.....
I'm all around mad. And creeped out, and fucking worried. I've had issues with sexual harassment at different (but same vein) work places in the past, and this job is newer. The culture felt different. Today I wore a new dress that looked great and made me feel like a million bucks, and I left work excited to crush my gym session and it all feels shit on by some random guy named Tyrone.
I don't really know what to do. I literally only know the name he gave me, and I know his car is a white sedan with black rims. I just wasn't paying attention. It's like as soon as I allow myself to feel comfortable with just existing some guy will appear and remind me that I can't do that.
UPDATE: thank you all who commented, it truly made me feel less alone. last night i got home and reached out to my partner and was so anxious about how he'd respond (would he think i was overreacting? would he question why i responded the way i did? will he get it? re: i've dated far too many NVM who have done this to me) and he immediately asked me if i was okay and if i wanted him to come over, and got to my place as quickly as he could. he told me he hated i had to go through that and didn't question me at all, just supported me. i called my mom and step dad (before they retired they worked for the county as a therapist and public defender, so they have experience with these kinds of things) and asked them what i should do in regards to my schedule and routine. they both gave me great advice, and my HV stepdad told me to report this guy as soon as he heard he waved me down to "chat." i messaged my desk lead and he was incredibly supportive, and today we sat down with our two superiors in my company and explained what happened, and they immediately sprang into action saying it's horribly inappropriate and entirely unacceptable, and they are airing on the side of caution with this guy being very dangerous. my other coworker tonight offered to walk me to my car, and the security camera situation is being looked into. this is the first time in my entire life that the men involved don't discredit or invalidate me (other than my LV father who called me this morning) and are actually deeply and properly horrified by the actions of this creepy guy. the support from you wonderful queens of FDS, my family, coworkers, and partner have me feeling so much better than i did last night. thank you all <3
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