Taking your time from day 1.

RedWineandWienerDogs · 2021-10-30T18:02:09+00:00

You are absolutely correct. A man will wait as long as you are comfortable with waiting.

arnezuara · 2021-10-30T18:21:23+00:00

Do what you want to do. Meaning, take as long as you need to decide whether or not he deserves to have your number.

Do not be afraid about doing anything that would turn him off.

BaddestSeaWitch · 2021-10-31T02:55:58+00:00

Yes yes yes! Maintain your standards Queen. An HVM will respect your boundaries and will accept the pace you are comfortable with. Your time and energy are valuable and you’re right, you should be deliberate with who gets access to it.

Also, your decision is going to be free of the initial enthusiasm and flirting that can cloud our judgements, and more strongly based on observations and gut instincts you had about him during the outing. Taking things slow is always to our advantage.

Be careful though, men who are interested will wait and chase (albeit different attitudes) whether they are ZVM NVM LVM or HVM. So just because he might pursue you strongly even though you kept him waiting doesn’t mean you should lower your guard. Keep vetting.

Kampungmonyet · 2021-10-30T18:13:03+00:00

I totally agree with you. Why would you give your number to someone who you might not be interested in and could potentially harass you? Any decent man would respect you taking your time.

Weekly-Choice8407 · 2021-10-30T19:27:10+00:00

If taking your time to decide whether or not to give your number turns him off….too bad. Turning him on is not your job or goal. If he loses interest then good, he was a piece of crap any way.

chamomilepill · 2021-10-30T20:59:59+00:00

HE is courting YOU so the rules are completely yours. That is a good tactic to weed out LVM too.

Junior-Lion7893 · 2021-10-31T15:37:37+00:00

He should have tried to talk to you rather than go to your friend.

If he wanted to, he would have created any reason to hang out with you from day1.

From his actions, I wouldn’t give him my number. He sounds lazy.

Angrymarshmallow2 · 2021-10-30T21:43:21+00:00

Dude sounds lv, why isn't he asking you directly? That's some middle school trash, not brave enough to face you directly. Move on sis and find a man your equal

sleepysiri · 2021-10-31T14:26:47+00:00

This reminds me of high school. A guy asking my friend to ask me out LMAO. Is he a grown man??

KathyisQueen · 2021-10-30T19:18:52+00:00

You’re so right. He took his time to think and went through a 3rd party with the intention of getting your number. Which is pretty personal info tbh. I would have preferred if he asked that friend to set up another group hang so he could express his interest to you directly. Feels a little weird and juvenile to me as well tbh.

LanaDelDesperate09 · 2021-10-30T23:55:19+00:00

Impatience in men is always a red flag for me. My narcissist ex was very impatient and that was a big problem in the relationship. I also never had a good experience with impatient men in general. It shows their entitlement to you, like I gotta have you and it has to be when I want it! So yes, take your time always.

TellCerseeItWasMe · 2021-10-31T15:19:56+00:00

Oof no

Don't give it if he didn't ask you to your face

Vaahla · 2021-10-31T15:04:07+00:00

I don’t like him going through a friend to ask for your number. It’s juvenile. If he was feeling shy, or just didn’t recognize you guys vibing until after the fact, why couldn’t he ask his friend to give you his number??

“Hey, Buddy at the party really liked you and wanted me to ask for your number.”

And

“Hey, Buddy at the party really liked you and asked me to pass his number along to you, just in case you were interested ###…”

Feel pretty different. One expects something from you (trust), the other offers something to you to take or leave with no consequence.

Title	Taking your time from day 1.
Author	plomerst
Upvotes	252
Comments	40
Date	October 30, 2021 5:41 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/qj6hov/taking_your_time_from_day_1/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/taking-your-time-from-day-1.1080930 https://theredarchive.com/post/1080930

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