Teach your daughters to recognize the tricks older men might use on them.

curlywurlyprincess · 2021-05-30T18:28:55+00:00

It’s creepy and predatory.

When I was 18 this 33 y/o guy kept asking me out on dates and promising to take me to nice restaurants(he was pretty well off, worked in finance). He kept sweet talking me cos I’m guessing he thought I was naive due to my young age. Of course I was creeped out but I tried to reject him politely. I explained that I’m too young and not ready for a relationship.

He said that I’m “mature” and have a “womanly figure” which meant that I was ready for a relationship with an older guy. He even described me as “fecund” (I had no idea what that meant at the time). He knew I was 18….

I eventually told him that he’s way too old and should find someone in his age group instead of being a creep. That pissed him off but luckily he left me alone 😬

leptophile · 2021-05-30T20:28:58+00:00

Absolutely. I could have avoided so much pain if an older role model had candidly explained to me why older men (and predatory men in general) need to be avoided. When I was younger my parents apparently tried to “protect” me from this kind of thing by keeping me in the dark about it. So I wound up learning about it the hard way, and now I have to carry that trauma for the rest of my life. I understand that matters like this are very difficult to discuss with girls and young women, but it will save them so much pain in the long run.

No_Mistake_7720 · 2021-05-30T20:18:55+00:00

It's so concerning... Honestly I do not think women and girls ARE sufficiently aware of the tactics... The story of Courtney Stodden that was highlighted again recently made me realise how long a way we still have to go, especially as SHE was blamed and picked on when she was quite clearly a victim.

Personally, I was groomed by a 30 year old when I was 17 and we did eventually get together. Even though 17 is the legal age in my country, it was still a 100% grooming as these ADULTS prey on CHILDREN because they can mold & groom them in what in what it is they want. In my case, a sex slave, who wasn't allowed agency or an opinion. It really messed up my development and I don't think enough people were scandalised by it whilst it was going on. Actually, his friends high-fived him, but made fun of me for being childish (... who knew a child would be childish...)

This is also why we have to stop blaming women and girls for falling the tactics of these depraved men; Courtney, myself and countless others are victims. Making fun of them only creates a barrier for them seeking help and support and only pushes them more towards the depraved male.

WiggleWormDelux · 2021-05-30T19:10:01+00:00

Yes! I always imagined having daughters to teach this lesson!! I have ended up with 2 boys. Gotta raise them well, and will bring age gap relationships to their attention.

Onextto0 · 2021-05-30T21:50:32+00:00

When I was 18 my 26 y/o bf would tell me "Youre an independat woman, you shouldnt let your parents dictate who you date. Who cares if they won't support you anymore, as long as you got me."... but at the same time when I tried to cOmMuNiCaTe my opinions and ideas to him, he would tell me "youre still just a kid/kiddo"

WCAttorney · 2021-05-30T21:48:38+00:00

"There are no bad girls, only predatory men"

Jaelismyhomegirl · 2021-05-30T23:30:18+00:00

I remember hearing the “mature for her age” line from the parents of a creep. Their 40 year old son was engaged to a 22 year old, and their explanation was “well, she’s mature for her age”, as though she were the problem, and not their scrotey son.

LadyL1234 · 2021-05-30T22:04:00+00:00

200% agree. When my daughter worked at her first job (drive through), men my age or older would come in and tell her things like this. They would attempt to get her number also or look her up on social. We had her change jobs. That ended that and it led to many conversations just like this of warning signs.

jp2117515 · 2021-05-31T01:19:03+00:00

We just had a new girl start at work and the whole office is pretty much 40 and 50 year old men. She’s 25. It’s unreal the way certain ones have grossly over estimated their market value and are trying to “mentor” her - literally falling all over themselves to get her attention. It will be interesting to see how she responds or tolerates this clownery.

modernmedusaa · 2021-05-30T22:07:00+00:00

‘You’re not like those bitter (smart) old women my age who won’t go near me! So fresh! So naive!’

Idk why young lib fems are impressed by old ugly men with money either. You ever met a young man with money? There’s plenty of them.

Also so many pick mes get fooled by ‘he’s more mature than men my age’ ...mm is that why he’s dating women 20 years younger then? He’s just better at saying the right things/manipulating.

MyLifeIsWandsXIII · 2021-05-31T02:19:12+00:00

If I ever have daughters I am going to teach them every FDS principle in the book, and teach them about feminism as well so they hopefully don't go through a pickmeisha/"cool girl phase" and get taken advantage of by older, disgusting LVM/NVM or any disgusting man in general.

europoor24 · 2021-05-30T18:27:24+00:00

Offering them a drink because they're mature..

_blondeteacher · 2021-05-30T21:51:26+00:00

When I was 15 a guy who my sister went to college with (21) started messaging me to talk. I thought that he wanted to be friends. I got bad vibes to I made him talk to me in a group chat. Now I know how inappropriate it was.

Tanalize · 2021-05-30T19:24:14+00:00

"That man is 5 years older than you? The fuck he wanna do with yo- Girrrrllll- if you don't block and delete I'm finna fight you and him- stop it." Is how I'll teach her the tricks 😌

Cultural_Training249 · 2021-05-30T23:17:51+00:00

I was warned about older men before I started dating and I've always heeded the advice and have never dated a significantly older. It doesn't matter how much older that I get, I still will not date significantly older men. They are mentally off and are preying on the naivety and lack of knowledge of someone younger. Even as an older women who is open about my age. Men and women keep being shocked at my age and think I am nearly 20 years younger and that can be a huge drawback too.

Men who are getting older want a fit women to take care of them as they age because they are in poor health and they try to hide that. No older men, no matter how old you are. Do not let them suck your youth, health and vitality away. I truly believe it will age you and wear you down.

Geocities_SEO_Expert · 2021-05-31T00:40:53+00:00

The most dangerous ones are the ones just a few years older who prey on college-age women. They know what they are doing. Just having any job makes them look so mature, miles above idiot party bros. They can play the enlightened, empathetic lefty guy role, and then laugh behind her back as they party with the regular party bros.

samedinuitmort · 2021-05-31T10:39:47+00:00

I’m currently beyond baffled and livid at how Germany has a 14 (FOUR TEEN) age of consent (though the parents can decide to pursue legal action if the other party is over 21 and they don’t approve I think, but maximum sentence is 3yrs). FOURTEEN.

And most parents don’t even know what their teens are up to on the internet or otherwise.

Furious. Just furious. This type of law makes grown men think they can just fuck a kid. In California the same act would give up to 20 years in jail. Jesus, just driving 100km to the east into Poland would give a man up to 10 years for the exact same thing.

What is UP with the WORLD??

CityOfBirth · 2021-05-30T20:50:03+00:00

When I was 14/15, my parents dug through my phone & found a bunch of skype logs of me ERP-ing (read: erotic roleplay) with a 25 year old.
They took my phone away & grounded me for two weeks. They also made it so I wasn't allowed to bring my phone to bed with me anymore, I had to leave it out on the kitchen counter so they can snoop through it whenever they wanted.
& that's it. That's all they did. I couldn't even explain to my friends why I was grounded because well, "I got grounded because I was sexting a pedophile" isn't something you're gonna tell your friends lol.
But like, how they handled it was seriously dogshit. I blamed myself, I thought it was all my fault, like I made some mistake, & I grew really depressed & felt super isolated in that month. I wanted to tell the guy I was sexting "Hey sorry I'm not gonna be available for a while." & them doing this did nothing to prevent this shit from happening further, because when they stopped tracking my phone, I got back into contact with him & guess what? I started sexting with him again. Woo, great job mom & dad, you really protected me.
Luckily, I guess, he vanished from the internet not long after, I couldn't find anyone still in contact with him, his facebook page was gone, his youtube channel boasting several thousand subs (which was pretty good for a Dark Souls PvP channel) vanished overnight, as well as his twitch channel. His chatango account, which is the site I met him on, still exists although it says "last online 99+ days ago" & I'm pretty sure you can't delete those profiles. My headcannon is that the parents of one of the other girls he was grooming caught wind of what was going on, & actually did the right thing & confronted him so he turned tail & vanished hoping to avoid any pedophilia charges.

Guuurrrl_okeehay · 2021-05-31T04:23:44+00:00

When I was 25, I had a 50 year old Regional Director of a Fortune 500 Company followed me around the grocery shop. We chatted because I was focus on not making a scene because I do not know if he had something on him that would take my life away. He asked me for out on a date. I declined and said I had a boyfriend. I started to giggle to show my ring.

I was so lucky that day that I had a ring on. Saved my life.

Now with technology and social medias, it's going to be tougher to let children know the dangers of adding people on social medias who you do not know. I just know I'm going to let my kids watch more of what human trafficking is like so hopefully they use their brain.

Nightshift_Owll · 2021-05-31T09:24:35+00:00

I’m never having kids. Especially a daughter. I wouldn’t want her to go through anything I did

galian84 · 2021-05-31T23:09:50+00:00

Can confirm that they just want a young woman to groom and be their plaything. I used to believe the myth of “older men are more mature/financially stable”. What a lie. There’s a reason why they can’t get women their own age.

I fell in the trap of dating someone 19 years older than me - he was 45 and I was 26. He manipulated and dismissed my concerns every chance he got, using my age against me. “When you’re older, you’ll see what I mean” and “you wouldn’t get it, you’re too young.” And he was broke and completely worthless. Couldn’t fix or cook anything. Barely knew how to use a computer. He was super cheap even though he made six figures.

Another ex was 36 and proudly said he had dated an 18-year old (and complained about her being childish). My ex’s cousin started dating a 24 year old when she was 18 because she didn’t like “boys her age”. Those two men could barely take care of themselves and were both broke. And my dad remarried a woman 35 years younger than him. These men get commended and envied by other men. The women get made fun of and disrespected.

I echo the others, never date an older man. With very few exceptions, they age faster, just want a young woman to sleep with and take care of them, and you’ll become a caregiver before you know it. Don’t fall for their BS.

Title	Teach your daughters to recognize the tricks older men might use on them.
Author	ThatBitchDesiree
Upvotes	626
Comments	27
Date	May 30, 2021 5:25 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/nofwzw/teach_your_daughters_to_recognize_the_tricks/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/teach-your-daughters-to-recognize-the-tricks-older.774227 https://theredarchive.com/post/774227

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