Saw this post on IG and wanted to share.

Asking “what do you bring to the table?” has become a conversation many including myself are having. I hate the question and I’ve always heard it on podcasts, clubhouse rooms and in real life. Often from some men who expect a woman to list out her qualities there and then to find out the benefits and value she brings. This question will have the audacity to come from some, who don’t have their shit together. I want to know and understand which women are answering the question, but also I ask that you to stop. A lot do not care, it’s a condescending question created to trick and trip you up. Not only that, men and women lie. You could ask a woman what she brings and she could mention loyalty, but be a raging cheater. Are these qualities you look for in a person not shown to you after time? So why are we asking questions which sound like they were made for job interviews? We act as though many women, especially in the black community haven’t been brought up to have these qualities drummed into them from birth to be good wives and mothers. We act as though women haven’t been drained out from handing out emotional labour in situationships with people who weren’t worthy. Quite frankly, women bring just much to this imaginary table if not more. it is more.

Now, I’m not saying that you can’t and shouldn’t ask a romantic interest questions to gauge who they are, that happens when getting to know someone authentically .. but there’s something very loaded and loud when someone asks “what do you bring to the table?” Have you ever noticed when it’s asked or how it’s asked? Women are earning just as much as men, they’re just as educated and constantly improving and learning new skills and creating side hustles on top of holding down 9-5s. The truth is a lot of women are the table, whilst the ones who are asking about it do not have 4 legs to stand on.

Some on Twitter mentioned that if you’re triggered by the question it’s because you bring nothing. Being able to identify stupidity does not equal being triggered. Men are extremely aware of how they see you in their future whether that’s casual hook ups or dating.. they are aware.

So to whoever's daughter is reading this please continue to work on yourself and NOT because some incel online or in person is asking you what you bring to his wobbly table, but for YOU. Even if you say vagina & vibes, just remember women have been trained since birth to be everything and more in order to be desired by a man.. while they can bring mediocrity, an uncleaned bum, "potential" and d!ck to the table. Spare me.