Resurrection

redmountainpill · 2017-01-14T04:24:12+00:00

25 years without strange and then all of a sudden you just 'let it happen?' I've done my share of playing around. It takes a fair amount of work. There must be some void that it's filling. What do you think that is? I read your last post with a lot of admiration for your capacity for self-reflection. Sounds like you want a loving, faithful partnership. Why now?

SampsonBrass · 2017-01-14T12:34:04+00:00

I have had this exact conversation with my brother many times. I never have an answer for him either and in his case I'm not sure why he thinks I do.

In my forties, I stopped looking for answers to the leftover unanswered questions of my twenties and thirties. Sartre stayed on the bookshelf after that.

Sometimes there just aren't any. This isn't very helpful I know from an MRP perspective which requires reflection and honest inquiry. Cast me out of Eden if you must but I think sometimes you have to stop asking and just keep moving. Answers may emerge in time or they may never.

j_arbuckle2012 · 2017-01-14T20:47:23+00:00

I feel absolutely no remorse. It was just attraction, desire and fun sex.

That right there is exactly what women who cheat feel. Thanks for the perspective.

As for you, man you're a fuckin' old guy. If you can't figure it out, why bother? It was fun, you had a good time and you aren't too twisted up inside about it. It seems to me that you're trying to moralize something that, deep down, you don't give a shit about (fidelity to your wife). Why not just accept that your wife ain't doing her job and keeping your interest?

Guys here work so god damned hard on sparking and fanning the flames of their wives' desire for them, but the fact remains that Game is a two way street and wife Game exists, and sometimes, she's just not up to snuff. So be it. Deal with that.

Coniferous_88 · 2017-01-14T03:53:35+00:00

There is a lot of talk on here about being her 'oak' and standing firm while weathering her emotional storms...I get it, but someone on here made the observation a while back that weathering the storm is fine, but after a certain amount of time putting up with too many storms, a man may just decide to move to a warmer climate.

I guess the real question is, what do you want? Or rather, what perspective did you gain from the experience?

WhiteTrashKiller · 2017-01-14T04:36:13+00:00

Your not missing anything! There is nothing wrong with seeking personal pleasure in this life. You're not going to die any less of a death because you fucked outside of your marriage or two.

The problem is you say you have no problem with it, yet you seek some kind of correspondence about the matter. Is it that you want validation, that what you want as a man to be told it is okay to chase those prizes? You won't find it here, the high and mighty judgements stop upon swallowing the pill and ones fate.....

Either accept your life for what you are and what it is, or fix yourself if you think you are doing it wrong! Nobody will judge you, no second guessing, ridicule, etc. Give us something others can grow from, IE how to keep cheating on the down low, how to determine when a relationship turns to shit(you've had two), or when to pack it in and start the chase again.......

Don't look to a community that wants to work towards fixing their situation and grow into men that women want to be in a relationship with as opposed to you having your cake and eating it too!

This isn't to say you cannot be who you want to be, but there is no duality of man in this forum. You cannot play both sides....

Very few can!

Aechzen · 2017-01-14T15:42:12+00:00

Congrats on the hot lay. The seduction sounds like a lot of fun.

RP_SuitScholar · 2017-01-14T17:31:28+00:00

I found this post helpful personally. Thank you.

man_in_the_world · 2017-01-14T06:37:24+00:00

We (slightly) younger folks here look to you, wise and experienced old man, for answers! I can only share musings, not advice. But for whatever they're worth...

Some people can use cocaine if it is offered to them at a party, have a great time, and never think about the drug again until the next occasional spontaneous use.
Others become habitual users at considerable cost to their performance and happiness in other areas of life, but remain functional and stable.
Still others become uncontrollably addicted and destroy their lives and relationships.

But probably all think they're in the first group after the first time. Which are you? How do you know? If you head further down that path

do you understand and accept your motivations for doing so?
do you know beforehand exactly how far you want to go?
If not, will you recognize when you've reached that point?
When you do, will you have the wisdom, will, and strength to stay there, or retreat if you overshoot?

Since the answers surely vary for every man, only you can answer these questions for yourself. I suspect, though, that the primary dangers are

not knowing your true motivations and goals, leading to garbage-in, garbage-out decisions, or
laziness in taking the easy path that leads to less than optimal end results, rather than the initially harder path that ends up in a preferred place (like eating prepackaged junk food now rather than preparing a more satisfying meal).

From my own vastly more limited experience, I can only share that as I've put more effort myself over the past few months into improving my sex life with my wife of 30+ years, my desire for her has increased. Had I put similar time or mental energy into looking elsewhere, I doubt that would have happened. YMMV.

saint_chalet · 2017-01-14T13:25:28+00:00

Not cheating, for so many years , was an act of validation to yourself. It's how you told your self that you're better than that guy who cheated so much in your first marriage.

25 years is long fucking time

You sought a new validation today and she was fine, made you feel great.

You're being honest with yourself, you enjoyed it. I think what you did is fine because you're not lying to yourself.

bogeyd6 · 2017-01-14T14:00:17+00:00

We can't spend all of our time rehashing all the things we should have done. Yesterday is gone and you can't get it back.

My surmise of what happened. You met someone fun and you were attracted to her. Instead of cheating from a frame of guilt/shame/payback you decided to go ahead and enjoy this. When you are married there is no reason you cannot fuck other women. There is no need to feel guilty.

My only issue with people cheating are those who do it from a weak frame. The ones who go out and cheat because they can't get it at home. That's not improvement, that self defilement. Great write-up, really enjoyed reading this.

P.S.

Take it from me, hit and quit it. You ain't tiger woods and you don't need to validation seek.

Westernhagen · 2017-01-14T05:19:31+00:00

Over 60 and scoring 30-somethings? You give me great hope for the future! My mom lives in an assisted living facility and the 60-somethings there are old wrecks who can barely get out of their wheelchairs.

BluepillProfessor · 2017-01-15T01:44:48+00:00

Guilt is only a problem if you let it be a problem. Like the Anger Stage, guilt gets better over time. I am pretty sure it is subject to the inverse square rule substituting distance for time.

rather then make a conscious decision, as is my usual method, I just let it happen.

Like a girl, you just fell into that pussy. There was no conscious decisions involved at all?

screechhater · 2017-01-15T17:29:12+00:00

I deal with a lot of guys running through that Mid Life Crises bullshit and for some reason I hear the same old shit ........ bedroom stagnant, life just become a chore, tired of all her ranting and raving. I just laugh. Its actually just fucking comical

Then there is a post or two recently with comments about mid life crisis.

Then I read this post.

Perhaps the missing part is the mental aspect of the seduction. You know you can get it with your wife You know you can seduce her with regularity and if she refuses, you now have your weapon of removing time and presence.

But this does not actually feed the OxyContin euphoric feeling in the brain of complete strange. Now does it. ? It is what it is. There is no denying it.

But perhaps the greatest rush to me is the sister in law, young cousin or her distant family grinding, offering, or pulling up a shirt in a remote area.

Perhaps a dose of absence with the bros will help. To, ya know, make the heart grow fonder. I'm not talking about out all night. I'm talking about at least a couple of days if not a week.

My wife drives me in with her heels if I'm gone overnight. Backs up onto me for multiple nights. I'm working on a trip to another country for work currently

One of the other aspects of her desire I notice, is trips away from the home without family or the kids.

Menopause for some women, I am finding out, is catastrophic and a lot of the men get the fall out of the self esteem and confidence dump.

May I add that you keep working on you and your MAP.

I am seeing great traction. The SO is headed to the doc to deal with some issues in regards to her body changes that have her perplexed, that I am seeing is a mental block that she is seeking help to overcome, to react to me in a pleasing manner as she did in our younger pre children days

The most comical reaction of late is my comment about her hair growing back out in length. "I'm not cutting my hair again You only like long hair on women .....". Ding, ding, ding !!!

Ya strange is great. I have had my fair share. But its the chase and the mental rush. When you come to realize she just can't flood your hips like the SO it becomes complacent pretty quick, doesn't if ? Course I get mine drilling an ass like there's gold in there. Cause betabux is too afraid to break that china dish ......

nonnimoose · 2017-01-14T16:37:44+00:00

Would this have "just happened" if, with your wife, things weren't "increasingly dead bedroom?"

Just curious.

edit: OK, nevermind - I see you have basically answered this later; I should have read further.

Nyquil-Junkie · 2017-01-14T16:35:44+00:00

Any way you spin this hamster wheel you still are cheating on your wife, and with all due respect, you're an asshole.

DamaskRose548 · 2017-01-14T16:20:46+00:00

Oh this totally happened!!!...aren't you a 70 year old still alive Petri Dish?...you supposedly met someone at a Home Depot full half your age then had sex the same day. Lol riiight. How absolutely pathetic. I would suggest you get help, but it's already far too late for that. edited typo Home Depot

Title	Resurrection
Author	over60_stupid_loner
Upvotes	16
Comments	102
Date	January 14, 2017 3:06 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MarriedRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/5nv7h4/resurrection/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MarriedRedPill/resurrection.199174 https://theredarchive.com/post/199174

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