This message applies mostly to the TRP rookies and college students like myself, but this is something I wish I knew long before I discovered it. When it comes to SMP, moms, whether they know it or not, raise you be the type of man they would want; a beta/provider. My parents divorced my freshman year of high school; they fought all the time growing up, until finally my dad threw in the towel after 13 years of relentless demands and controlling aspirations from my mother. Fast forward to now, 6 years later, and not much has changed from my mom. I come home for Christmas break from college and at least twice a day, some BB shows up at the door with food, offering to shovel her driveway or give into one of many requests she has. Men have come and left in my mom’s life very quickly, and it is clear what she looks for in a guy: a short-term provider. When asked why she doesn’t plan on settling down with a new man, she says “I’m not looking for anything serious,” but she leads the men in her life on as if she was planning on having something of that matter. Her only ex-boyfriend (after my dad) happened to be a close mentor of mine growing up. When I asked him why they broke up, he said their relationship was a “one-way street,” the same phrase my dad used. Don’t get me wrong, I love my mom to death, as all sons should, but for those who still live with their moms, it’s important to take her advice with a grain of salt, and to learn from the mistakes the men in her life make. My first girlfriend was sophomore year of high school, and, although I didn’t realize it at the time, my mom’s advice was the catalyst that sparked our breakup. My mom stressed paying for EVERYTHING my girlfriend bought, because that is something she values. Sooner or later, my girlfriend was expecting me to pay for everything, because she had become used to it. Through my mom’s advice, I had become a provider in my girlfriend’s eyes. When it came to sex, my mom said I wasn’t ready for it, and shouldn’t even be thinking about it. As a sophomore in high school I had a pretty strong sex drive and was more than willing to pop the cherry at that point, but because of my mom’s advice, I held off for a few more years. Again, I displayed a beta characteristic by not demonstrating sexual authority. Lastly, my mom made it clear of displaying a “Mr. Nice Guy,” approach. I sent my girlfriend good night and good morning texts, had 1+ hour phone conversations a few times a week, and made corny gifts saying how much I loved her. Looking back on it, it was super cringe. Moms should always be a resource sons can go to for advice, but when it comes to TRP principles, it’s on us to learn them on our own because they will not come from mouth of our mothers. The solution is to learn from first-hand experience. To those with single moms; what do the guys who stay in your mother’s life do correctly? Hint: it’s the opposite of what your mom teaches you. Make women WANT you by giving off the appearance that you don’t want them.

TLDR – Moms raise us to be betas. Choose for yourselves how to interpret their advice but don’t put it on a pedestal. Practice TRP and learn from your own experience and surroundings.