Friendzone after 3 months of relationship

KennyF91 · 2017-02-16T01:56:57+00:00

Some other guy caught her interest or you became a boring routine. It happens to everyone at least once.

88Will88 · 2017-02-16T05:13:55+00:00

"My heart is so shattered right now and there's a huge void inside of me."

Textbook ONEitis. That is why she broke up with you. If you give a girl all of you, you are fucked. You gotta have one foot out the door and be ready to next for any major transgression. She could smell the beta that you turned into. If you love her more, or as much as she loves you, then you are acting submissive. Submissive is repulsive to women

theredpill101 · 2017-02-16T06:09:00+00:00

Her text is way too long, and tries way too hard at evoking your sympathy.

I think what you're seeing here is the female version of dread game. She's trying to scare you into thinking she's gonna disappear so that you'll come running and appease her with a commitment.

If you do: you've gone BP and put the mark of death on the relationship.

if you don't: she'll come back to try to convince you again that she's worth it.

Sounds like you fell into some serious feelings. Brush that shit off and try to keep your head above water next time.

anddennn · 2017-02-16T02:03:05+00:00

I was banging 3 girls at the time until she came along and then I dumped them.

This was the part that shattered MY heart.

sazzmflazm · 2017-02-16T06:17:41+00:00

You "treated her better" the past few weeks. Whatever that entailed, it means you got the oneitis cancer and lowered your SMV in her eyes. Her words mean nothing, her actions say it all. Same shit happened to me. She was head over heels for me while I was indifferent for her. As soon as I went over to her side in feelings, she lost the feelings for me. It's a cruel fucking joke the universe plays on us and shows you, without exception, you cannot catch the oneitis no matter what. It's guaranteed heartbreak. Had you continued to play it cool and nonchalant towards her she'd still be all over your dick. Fuckin nature man...

ioncloud9 · 2017-02-16T03:50:15+00:00

When a girl says she loves you its just the way you make her feel IN THAT MOMENT. It can and will change the second something better lands in her life.

Mangoinhand · 2017-02-16T14:04:00+00:00

"What did I do wrong I have no idea. My heart is so shattered right now and there's a huge void inside of me. I was banging 3 girls at the time until she came along and then I dumped them."

This.

You got oneitis and compromised your own values.

She will likely be back (Blackdragon quote a 90%+ return rate for his girls).

But. You had to reply in an outcome independent way.

Such as:

"Alright cool, have fun!"

(Instant long Soft Next aka LSNFTE)

You put her in your calendar/spreadsheet and message her with a simple "Hey X, how's it going?" Every 60 to 120 days.

Mr-Ed209 · 2017-02-16T05:28:11+00:00

'I treat her better for last 2 weeks'

Explain in which ways you treated her 'better'. The problem is women REALY don't know what they want. They're brainwashed by the media to think they wan't a guy to be at their beck and call, bring them flowers etc. However, those actions generally raise feelings of disgust and uneasiness within them. TRP makes us aware of what really is beneficial to a girl sticking around, please for your sake realise that we have it 'right' here and they (society, most women) have it wrong. TRP theories are founded 'somewhat scientifically' - in that all of us share these universal experiences and have identified common behaviours that work and do not work. I know it's hard when it's a girl you like - it's in our nature to want to be caring and nice.

People here are saying to 'be cold to her' and they are 100% correct. Break it down and analyse it.

If this really is the end, you won't lose face and can walk away on your feet and not your knees.
In so many cases this behaviour will actually restore her interest. It will then be up to you wether you choose to accept her back in to your life and wether you really want to deal with someone who's emotions can flip so rapidly.

Don't be bitter and buy into this chad shit. There could/likely be another guy. But I'd bank she's only looking for other guys because you dropped your 'strong' characteristics in favour of being nice. Wrongly thinking it would benefit you.

Zweihander747 · 2017-02-16T14:52:19+00:00

Kill your emotions brah. Only thing you should love is the money

Ascended_One · 2017-02-16T13:14:36+00:00

Dude, chill.

Just reply with "ok" and wait for a while. She'll be back.

silvrbckgorilla · 2017-02-16T21:41:45+00:00

Ok people. You gave me so much insight. There are a lot of possibilities why this happened but it matters not now since I found a lot of cracks in my game.

I'll go cold turkey. She's dead for me now. I'll message her in 3 months if I still care and see what happens.

Now I have different kind of problem. I'm heartbroken. Even though I understand all of this I still have this set of feelings. I can't sleep, can't eat and I have constant anxiety and anxiety attacks. This is literally worst I have ever felt in my life by a long shot.

Any advice?

sse23 · 2017-02-16T14:47:41+00:00

She is trying to shame you into a relationship with her.

Theunforgiven193 · 2017-02-16T22:01:09+00:00

Cut her completely out of your life. Even though you had your shit together she has you on a leash and she knows it. This is just to test how far she can pull you out of your frame. She wants you to become emotional about it and agree with the friendship or watever. She doesn't care about you all the things she is describing to you is pure manipulation to hypnotize you further in the "im in love" mindset. The only reason it hurts is because she has made you believe that it really was special. You're to far gone. Just cut it out of your life and go have "meaningless sex" (her words)

aanarchist · 2017-02-16T11:10:07+00:00

sounds like you were mr right now for her. plate spinning and abundance doesn't matter if you're just not connecting with her well. the thing about trp is 90% of dudes don't seem to understand that a woman actually wants someone to get along with rather than just some stud who racks up a notch count. she doesn't want to be a plate for the rest of her life to some loser who runs game, she actually wants to lock down and ltr an alpha male, and she knows you're a bad long term investment because you think too linearly.

Blackbull_ · 2017-02-16T15:41:45+00:00

You put the bitch on a fucking pedistal, that where you done fucked up.

PhucCheet · 2017-02-16T07:11:46+00:00

I treat her better for last 2 weeks

Elaborate. I think your idea of "better" may not have been better, or even what she was asking for. Take some time to analyze this and reflect.

In other threads, guys think "opening up" means whining about insecurities about whether she loves him enough and sharing obsessive petty jealousy over other men. No, that's not the kind of intimacy she was looking for.

Praecipuus · 2017-02-16T14:40:59+00:00

It's nothing but a shit test. Treat it lightly, ask her out as if nothing happened, and fuck her good.

kidwithambition · 2017-02-16T14:41:08+00:00

Men give commitment, women give sex.

You know where you were on the spectrum, think of it like a teeter-totter. You gave way too much than you got if you fell in love in 3 months.

Kommanderdude · 2017-02-16T16:48:20+00:00

Maybe this is some delusional attempt to make you fight for the relationship. Some girls are crazy like that and have that "You need to fight for us" story book and fairytale mentality. Figured I'd give it a different perspective than the normal she met someone else thin most people will post.

Poofysmoof · 2017-02-16T18:24:01+00:00

Too much talking maybe? Sounds like she knows a bit about your future plans, and i read it doesn't really include a LTR. More sex and less talking next time. Just my two cents.

SetConsumes · 2017-02-16T20:28:40+00:00

I treat her better for last 2 weeks and today I get this message

Kind of obvious isn't it? You acted like you actually cared about her too much compared to whatever amount of fuck you dgaf mentality you exhibit.

Your best chance at getting her back is acting like you don't give a shit and treating her more like shit as you were before given by.

she professes that she's in love with me and cries that no one has treated her worse.

Put yourself in front of her somehow and ignore the shit out of her, when she comes to you for attention sprinkle it minimally combined with plenty of dgaf.

You softened up because she asked you to and you love her.

Its classic. It's natural. It's what you want to do because you're not a complete fuck.

Such is the absurdity of life.

red_reality · 2017-02-16T21:00:21+00:00

When she met you, you were steering your ship, 100% in control of every move. That's what attracted her to you. As time went on you let her take turns steering your ship and after a while, she didn't even have to ask to steer it. Whenever she looked over, your ass was sitting in the corner ogling her, so she sat in the captains seat and had fun. That fun only lasted so long, however, as the thrill for her wasn't steering the ship, but the relinquishing of your control over the ship. In her eyes, she will never see you as the captain you once were. Even if you practicing steering your ship through the roughest seas and pick up all sorts of sick sailor tricks along the way. This lesson is a hard one to learn, but as long as you learn from it, you won't make the same mistakes again.

beltwaytr · 2017-02-16T21:30:43+00:00

Unless you're looking to get married, I wouldn't give too much thought to the situation. You've been self improving for 6 years so you should know by now women branch swing and no man here is immune to it. Appreciate it for what it was and move to the next broad. From the looks of that overly emotional message it sounds like you not only dodged a bullet but a few years of unnecessary headaches.

recklessgreed · 2017-02-16T23:23:55+00:00

I hope to God you didn't respond to that text. Go radio silent and do nothing. Inevitably she'll return, hamster in overdrive. Don't take her back.

You know what you did wrong. You gave a fuck, which is one too many.

jacquespenisse · 2017-02-17T04:37:39+00:00

She wanted the upper hand. This is a form of ultimatum so she can get you back on her terms. Think about it- majority of your relationship she was powerless- submissive to you while you dated 3 other chicks. Same thing happened to me. Women can sense you're dating others intuitively, so they sell themselves hard to you, they blow you, let you fuck them anally, whatever. Then when they realize their the only ones for you (you guys can be official by then even) they will rethink the entire relationship. Your girl- She's excessively wordy and gushy in her text to you. She doesn't really want to end it with you, she just wants you to be submissive to her. She wants you to get on your knees and say "I love you, please come back". If you do that, she'll shit on you. You gave her oneitis by dumping the other girls. You must always be ready to cut her off.

Remember Petyr Baelish's words to Sansa "People want what they can't have, when they have it they want something else". Keep that up there with the bleak maxims that are realistic and make you a better man. Maxims such as "life is short, brutish and meaningless", "time is money", etc.

I'll never forget a RP girl with BPD shit tested me until I went crazy, and she said "I don't like that you give your all to me". I was BP then and couldn't understand why. She said "you should be ready to kick me to the curb". BPD or not, she's a woman and that's straight from the horse's mouth. Plus, BPD is just woman x 10.

Anyway- cut her off, go back to fucking 10 girls again. I guarantee you that you'll receive a "hey" from her in the coming week. She probably is dating around and will realize she's getting nothing but lame dick and miss you.

Women love drama. My ex one day dumped me on a trip, I took the next flight back. She cried for days. She legit expected me to stay on the trip with her "as friends". Fuck outta here. She wanted me back when I went home. Then when we got back together- she was crying and wishing things went back to how they were- she kept up with the emotional ups and downs. Now she was HPD, but women in general have a few cluster B traits, especially women who lead men to TRP.

gideonrakthor · 2017-02-16T13:44:49+00:00

Dude that message is complete bullshit. Its just her way of making herself feel better for dropping you. It sounded so 'girly' for lack of a better word, I swear Ive read something like that somewhere. I hope you didn't respond or just said some simple "k" type response.

The best way to regard relationships with women is that its just your turn. No woman pre-wall is gonna settle with you, unless she's extremely simple/traditional. Even if your James bond and shes Consuela, shell drop you because you're too 'perfect'. And if she's particularly high class (celeb) they can monkey branch their entire lives.

Just accept that as their nature. From a woman's perspective, It sounds like a pitiful, childish tantrum from someone who cant handle rejection, but it is actually the response of an intelligent man who doesn't want to waste his time /energy.

Women are nice, but fleeting. Just like most cats. Don't ever think you can have the same relationship with a cat like you do with a dog. (I know this isn't 100% accurate but you get the picture)

ozaku7 · 2017-02-16T21:37:59+00:00

I have absolutely no right to tell you what to do now but don't go back to meaningless sex. You are capable of so much more. I'll miss you like crazy and probably eat my feelings for the next few weeks. You dodged a bullet if you really think about it. I'll soon be gross and fat. I'm sorry."

Sounds like she read your TRP history and felt played, lol.

TheYoungOwl_ · 2017-02-16T02:53:16+00:00

Should've treated her better if you liked her and value her as a person. Yes be an asshole if that's really who you are but temper that with a friendly demeanor.

She obviously liked you and respected you enough to be straight up. Maybe you should stay friends with her. She seems like a good girl.

If you must know...you probably didn't challenge her, she saw you giving up commitment rights so easily as a weakness and subconsciously the spark is gone.

Title	Friendzone after 3 months of relationship
Author	silvrbckgorilla
Upvotes	29
Comments	73
Date	February 16, 2017 1:37 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/5ubtxh/friendzone_after_3_months_of_relationship/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/friendzone-after-3-months-of-relationship.40955 https://theredarchive.com/post/40955

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