This may seem like a small or inconsequential behavior, but the ability to receive a compliment graciously is extremely important in social interactions.

Even if you are attempting to be humble, downplaying a compliment will backfire. When someone gives a compliment, they are putting themselves out there. Downplaying a compliment is in essence a form of rejection; if their compliment is sincere, you are negating a feeling they had about you and were willing to express. They will be less likely to open themselves up to you in that manner in the future. Additionally, downplaying a compliment will make you seem insecure and unsure of yourself, not humble.

The same holds true for returning compliments. On the surface, it seems like a friendly and polite thing to do. However, it comes of as being insincere. You are not giving someone a compliment based on something they did themselves, but rather as a favor for saying something nice about you. This will likely make them feel the opposite of how you intended when you returned the compliment.

If you receive a compliment, embrace it. If someone says something to you that is impactful, try to stay present in the moment and remember it for when you need it in the future. There is nothing egotistical about this. Tell them how it makes you feel. Simply saying “Thank you, that means a lot to me” is all you need if you mean it.