Hello, Reddit!

I am your typical ''nice guy'', with all the characteristcs of the stereotype. I've finally learnt that in today's society being the ''nice guy'' will get you nowhere. Even though this is a bit against my nature, i'll have to change that. By that, i don't mean turning into a bad person. Something like, treating people with more indifference. Of course, still being the same old me to family and very close friends, but have an attitude of somewhat not-giving-a-shit to new groups and aquaintances. Because by my ultra-nice guy nature, people looked at me as a weak person. And people feed on the weak. Throughout my life, I've been used, put down, fooled. Didn't happen many times, but whenever it did, i felt so low, weak and hurt...

Not to mention this has affected my relationship with women big time. Most of my crushes looked at me as a more-or-less, friend(tool), others didn't even bother, which is better.

I remember, in college, an ex-colleague confessed that she had a huge crush on me, I didn't. We were friends and kept a friendship after college. She was uninteresting to me at the time as a partner, so i just went on with my own life, acting like nothing happened, because i didn't really care. Shortly after I made myself scarce(i left town, and other things popped up), this made her chase me, wonder about my whereabouts, what am i doing and such. I only realised this really works, after so many years. Whenever i chased my own crushes, never ended well. Because I was always there, always trying to please, always careful not to upset, always saying ''yes'' to their stupid activities/stories/whatever, and giving away all details about myself leaving no room for mistery/wondering. Of course this way i became a very uninteresting a needy guy. Hell, it took me so long to figure out...

That's the burden of being the nice guy. Unfortunately, i'm not too good at not giving a fuck, but i'll try my best.