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[–]ALexusOhHaiNyan 112 points113 points114 points 13 years ago (39 children) | Copy Link
"Assume Attraction"
Funny how anything you really need to know about game could fit entirely on a business card - the rest is actually DOING it.
[–]Mindwraith 51 points52 points53 points 13 years ago (14 children) | Copy Link
A lot of problems come from "what do I do even if I know she likes me?". Plenty of guys have never been in that situation before so we have no idea what to do with it, whether the attraction is real or assumed.
[–]ALexusOhHaiNyan 34 points35 points36 points 13 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
Yeah, this is 1st world teenager problems and being awkward with your body. The answer is to go for it. But that's hard to do when you never have. Either start taking chances or be miserable - that's kind of how life works. Again, DO IT.
It's not fear of failure. It's fear of the unknown. The more you do things the more you realize the worst that could happen was far from worst. Or at the very least an awkward memory that turns to a hilarious story a decade after.
[–]Beanie_man 7 points8 points9 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
"Either start taking chances or be miserable - that's kind of how life works."
Well done sir.
[–]Kitad 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yeah, if you are having this problem make it a point to escalate every set you go to or try to go for a kiss no matter how awkward it may be.
It is not good game but it will teach you the calibration required to get over your sticking point really fast.
[–]pmid85 8 points9 points10 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
If you find yourself in that situation play it cool. Don't be outcome oriented, be process oriented. Indifferent of what happens that night.
[–][deleted] 6 points7 points8 points 13 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Yep, that's the big question.
[–][deleted] 5 points6 points7 points 13 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
I can 2nd that
[–]Rayofpain 66 points67 points68 points 13 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
WHY IS THIS GIRL TOUCHING ME IN THOSE PLACES
DOES SHE WANT TO DO THE MATING
[–]FuryofaThousandFaps 20 points21 points22 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Dost thou desire coitus?
[–]QuietlyLearning 6 points7 points8 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Just waiting for her to reply "snu snu now."
[–]dabigguy3 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Can someone please answer this?
[–]time_and_again 12 points13 points14 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
The entire sub is about answering that
[–]FuryofaThousandFaps 6 points7 points8 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Not to mention that there is more than one right answer, it's like anything else, people want shortcuts and that one trick that PUA's don't want you to know.
[–]_zarathustra 6 points7 points8 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Kiss her!
[–]TroubleWithTheCurve 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
dude, so true.
[–]Epoh 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link
What do you think would fill up the rest of the business card? There's gotta be 4 or 5 golden mantras that start to finish help out.
[–]ALexusOhHaiNyan 57 points58 points59 points 13 years ago* (6 children) | Copy Link
Hmm, yeah. Off the top of my head I'd have to say...
"Cocky/Funny"
It's the Tao of Game - Natural Game. That Flirting is about TEASING. You treat her like your bratty little sister. Refining Cocky/Funny is learning how to be so without going overboard into arrogance, or hurtfulness. But, the only way to refine it is to do it, and you will go too far. You should go too far. It's highly educational. In fact I'd reccommend letting the brakes off and releasing the goddamn Kraken. Say whatever, the fuck, you feel like. And, especially if you're in the "self pitying nice guy" trap you'll be surprised how it attracts girls. Granted immature, insecure girls. But they all are, you all are at that age. It's bloody liberating to just say what's on your mind and find out that...it works. Then as you age, you refine that Cocky / Funny attitude with time, and have become a healthy social animal.
I forget the age is probably pretty young around here. You can get away with murder when girls are young. The guys that got girls in HS said the crudest shit - cuz they can. I would stand there shocked, perplexed and girl-less whllst some mouthy douche had them delighted. Ask a strange girl if she likes it in the butt-butt, and you will most definitely find one that is amused to the point of arousal. If she acts shocked, which is not the same as disgust, you move on. She failed your test - she's boring. She no longer get's your attention, for now.
"You're attention is a gift"
Men want sex, we know this. But we don't focus on what women want, and bad comedians joke that it's impossible to know - when it isn't. Women want attention. Women that give sex too easy are easy. Men that give attention and approval too easy, are too easy - know this. And no one want's easy. She should earn your attention by being attractive, fun, available, and interesting.
Women of value act like they're pussies are precious, because they know that's what men want. Well, an informed man of value knows his attention is the gift, it's what women want. And when doled out properly, get's him what he wants.
Tl;DR You're attentions, like a womans pussy, is the prize. So treat it as such - Don't Be A Ho. And work your Cocky/Funny - this takes time, and practice, with people.
[–][deleted] 6 points7 points8 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
yeah this was basically the best comment i've seen in r/seduction in a long time
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
great post... cocky/funny is a given and been said too many times.
but not giving attention too easily is a great tip I think. Though it has also been said.
correct me here if I'm wrong but here is my understanding:
Women who give sex in hopes of getting men's approval and attention is easy. Those women will just give sex, and men will take it, but will not return with genuine attention or approval. Quality women give sex when they find the men to be great, trustworthy, and generally awesome and they'd genuinely enjoy having sex with him.
So by the same logic:
Men who give attention and approval in hopes of getting sex is also easy. They compliment for no reason, approve everything, and women will gladly take it but will not return with sex. Quality men give approval when they find the women to be genuinely great, and only give approval when its DESERVED, and only attend when its worth attending to.
its a little different but I think the general theme is similar and analogous.
[–]ALexusOhHaiNyan 2 points3 points4 points 13 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
You're gonna be fine lad, just fine...
Just remember. You can know this, but you won't KNOW it until repeated experiences drill it into your very core. Then you no longer have to remember what to do, you just do. And you'e had enough success to know that failure is only part of the tide. The student has become the teacher, he now has - Natural Game.
[–]Epoh 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You are so spot on with this, I think I'll try to just embody this attitude for the next while, and fuck it up if I have to to learn.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
The attention thing is HUGE. And it's the first I've heard it phrased like that in 18 months of lurking. Kudos.
[–]evasque2 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
that would be one strange business card, it would seem more like you are some strange cocker fighter trying to promote events as funny.
[–]Filereaper127 points 13 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
"Stop thinking about your hands!"
[–]longlive4chan 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
"smile, Goddammit!"
Stop thinking now and go!
[–]acetronik[🍰] -2 points-1 points0 points 13 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link
if you knew anything about psychology, you would realize that "DOING it" begins my THINKING it.
[–]jnethery 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Too much thinking is the problem. Remember the three-second rule.
[–]acetronik[🍰] 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Exactly. So best not to assume anything.
[–]jnethery 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
By nature of the human mind, it's impossible to not assume anything, so I'd say it's better to assume attraction than non-attraction.
[–]brasileiro555 -1 points0 points1 point 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
wrong, very wrong... yo can assume nothing
[–][deleted] 13 years ago* (6 children) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–]acetronik[🍰] -1 points0 points1 point 13 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
No human being is an absolute extrovert nor an absolute introvert. Every individual falls somewhere different on a spectrum between the two. A good place to begin your education on this is: Cain, Susan. Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking.
Perhaps you are not familiar with Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy or Cognitive Behavior Therapy. A good place to start would be by grasping Albert Ellis's ABC model.
If you are too lazy to do your research. Try answer this simple question: What makes you act? A great starting point for understanding REBT: Ellis, Albert, and Robert Allan. Harper. A New Guide to Rational Living.
[–][deleted] 13 years ago* (4 children) | Copy Link
[–]acetronik[🍰] 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
i'm here because i am interested in the psychology behind seduction.
i felt like challenging your comment because i have actual evidence that proves your claims wrong. this being the case, i'd be doing you a disservice by withholding said evidence.
i don't know anything about you and you don't know anything about me and that's okay. perhaps i am misinterpreting your main point and that's okay too. you have the choice to clarify so i can understand what you're trying to say OR you can try insult me (if that is what makes you feel better).
[–][deleted] 13 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
[–]acetronik[🍰] 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Hmmm... i still don't understand you. My main problem was when you said:
Extroverts, they act first, think later
This is simply an over-generalization. Thought always precedes action. The amount of time/energy spent thinking various from person to person and is CONTEXTUAL.
If there is one take-away from our fruitless debate, it is that there is are no "absolutes" when it comes to behavior (especially in seduction).
[–][deleted] 26 points27 points28 points 13 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
I decided to retract what I originally wrote to make a little bit of a statement. I feel like some of these posts, I'm not saying OP is one of them, are inspired by someone who ends up getting lucky for the first time in a while and then decides to post on here about how all it takes is a "smile" or something else minimal to get laid because they are in the middle of a post-hookup euphoria where they feel like anything and everything is possible. I'm not saying that isn't a good feeling to have, confidence through the roof is always great but, let's remember that it's more about etching yourself into a well-rounded individual who knows what moves to make and when. It's not just 'a big smile' and your in.
[–]FredFredson 7 points8 points9 points 13 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
The big point is that pickup really isn't that hard. And it isn't. The mere act of "thinking what to do" does more damage than most people realise. Inner strength and self-assuredness are highly attractive traits to women, along with sense of humour. By merely taking the advice of "assuming attraction", as long as you are actually following through on the advice, have the social skills to back it up and don't slip up and show any weakness you can see how powerful the impact of simple pieces of advice like this can be. That's the point. Yes, it's simple, but if you can understand the broader application of these bits of advice and why they actually work, you won't find them so silly. As soon as you show any sign of weakness or indecisiveness a women's attraction and respect for you will sharply drop. This is what "assuming attraction" helps to combat; it gives you a great first impression. Take that first impression and steam-roll forward. At the very least, it creates a subtext that you are not looking for their approval. Understand it for what it is, because inner-game advice is very powerful if you understand what it is actually doing for you.
This assumes a certain level of social skills though, which some may not have. In general though, if you are generally socially skilled, know how to use body language etc. then some simple inner game and mindset changes are probably the only changes you need to make. If you lack these social and body language skills, however, then incorporating outer game to help fill the gaps can be useful.
That's how I see it, anyway.
[–]banalredditing 6 points7 points8 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Sounds like someones problem didn't use to be anything but social calibration
[–]Xaxxus 2 points3 points4 points 13 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
I must be pretty ugly then, because i manage to make girls laugh at my jokes all the time, but the second I show interest they run the other direction.
[–]rasputin724 13 points14 points15 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Try showing interest right away.
[–]teh_booth_gawd 5 points6 points7 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
True. The prevailing mindset around here seems to be the idealistic 'any man can get any woman'. It's simply not true. You can be as smooth as The Most Interesting Man in the World, you ain't gonna be pulling down supermodels unless you have the right look.
Check out MFA to at least be as presentable as possible.
[–]gosurobber 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Just to add to the discussion, I think demographics play a part, I am 24, like to wear sneakers, jeans and tee shirt, I feel that it is going to be hard to hit on some lady who dresses very well (think the Queen lol) but I would enjoy success with other early 20s females who dress casual.
[–]brasileiro555 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
SAME HERE
[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Try hitting her.
[–]Xaxxus 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You know... That might just work.... At getting me arrested
[–]Goalkeeper5 11 points12 points13 points 13 years ago (21 children) | Copy Link
what is DHV?
[–][deleted] 29 points30 points31 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
demonstrations of higher value?
Yes. I don't know why a stupid joke got more upvotes, but I guess it's just the way the subreddit works when you get more members.
[–]MarsayMarsac 57 points58 points59 points 13 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Dont Hump Virgins
[–]Speedtarzanjujitsu 13 points14 points15 points 13 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Also works for Vegans.
[–][deleted] 35 points36 points37 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
They never swallow.
[–]eagleclaw457 10 points11 points12 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
because its an animal by product
[–]eagleclaw457 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
thats just smart thinking right there
[–][deleted] 13 years ago (13 children) | Copy Link
[–]huytn89 94 points95 points96 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Alright, dick.
[–]DancesWithCanoes 32 points33 points34 points 13 years ago (11 children) | Copy Link
The app doesn't have a sidebar
[–]Chemical 20 points21 points22 points 13 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link
If you are referring to Alien Blue, it does. Click on the universal arrow-in-box thingy at the bottom and click "Show Side Bar"
[–][deleted] 9 points10 points11 points 13 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
I can't find that option following your instructions.
[–][deleted] 8 points9 points10 points 13 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
You're not as stupid as the other redditors, you didn't get your penis stuck in a ceiling fan, did you?
[–]InternalDemons 5 points6 points7 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ceiling fan? Does not compute..
Instructions not clear enough, got dick caught in AC unit..
[–]LikeableAssholeBro 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Never thought of the ceiling fan...
[–]teh_booth_gawd 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
You have to be on the seddit page itself, not in a thread. I think.
Go to the top of the post, click where it says /r/seduction. Once that loads, click on the arrow-in-box and then it'll have the option to show the sidebar
[–]DancesWithCanoes 2 points3 points4 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
oh wow thank you
[–]VouNaoPossoNao -1 points0 points1 point 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
It's not very easy to read the side bar on alien blue. It takes you to the non mobile version. Impossible to zoom in and out. Please try things before suggesting to others
[–]ARealSocialIdiot -2 points-1 points0 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Fine then, I'll just suggest that they go to the regular website and read the sidebar on a computer. Those of us who have been here for awhile, read all of the material, and have absorbed it should not have to rehash simple definitions and classic routines just because somebody couldn't be bothered to read the material themselves.
[–]MonkeyMannnn 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Reddit sync opens the sidebar when you tap the subreddit name.
[–]ekbowler 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Well that's great but how do you smile on cue without looking like the Joker?
[–]AtomicFez 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I always think of something funny, normally a punch line to a joke or a funny pic/gif and that's enough to get a little laugh.
How to smile naturally for photos
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Picture kittens.
[–]jnethery 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Try practicing?
[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 13 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
Smiling is important, but saying it gets you 85%in is ludicrous. IMO this is a huge oversimplification.
[–]walterdonnydude 10 points11 points12 points 13 years ago (7 children) | Copy Link
He said if she's laughing at your jokes your 85% in, which is probably still an exaggeration, but not too far off
[+][deleted] -13 points-12 points-11 points 13 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Ok, still the the advice is to
a) be funny
b) don't be not funny.
Still a huge oversimplification IMO.
[–][deleted] 13 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 13 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Ok please explain it to me then. I honestly want to understand here and maybe I am missing the point.
[–]Hiding_in_the_Shower 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Obviously i'm not OP, but his point is in the title. He's saying that you don't need to put in massive amounts of work on every girl, and that many times simply making her laugh a lot is all you need. Yes the advice is be funny and don't be not funny, but the point of his post wasn't to teach humor.
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Ok sounds good. Thanks.
[–]MonkeyMannnn -1 points0 points1 point 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
OPs point is that all the techniques and routines in the world won't do it for you if you're not assuming attraction and coming from a position of confidence. That's really all there is to it. A gross over simplification, but you will not be pulling girls if you aren't secure in yourself and your game.
[–]OhMyGoat 4 points5 points6 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I'm pretty sure he meant walking in smiling, and confident. That's half the game.
[+]benbernankenonpareil -7 points-6 points-5 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Getting crushed with down votes
[–]electric_drifter 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I had this breakthrough not too long ago, always assume attraction people.
[+]Hrel -6 points-5 points-4 points 13 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
You need to define DHV.
Also, ok you're 85% in and you realized it. What next?
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 13 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Demonstrate higher value. Be of better value than other suitors.
Once you're 85% in, get 15 percent more.
[–]fuckbitchesgetmoney1 3 points4 points5 points 13 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
The last 15% is the tip.
[–]eagleclaw457 0 points1 point2 points 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
just the tip
[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
How was I to know you were lactose intolerant?
[–][deleted] 13 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
jerry jerry jerry
[–]jimhanson3 -1 points0 points1 point 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I"m not ugly and Ross Jeffries from seduction.com helped me score even more girls. I"m a little shy, so my game was off. and yeah, maybe I did just get laid!
[+]wolfie1010 -11 points-10 points-9 points 13 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This
© TheRedArchive 2026. All rights reserved.created by /u/dream-hunter
[–]ALexusOhHaiNyan 112 points113 points114 points (39 children) | Copy Link
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