The real reason your ex left and came back months later

apommom · 2021-09-07T18:02:00+00:00

Look up the term “hoovering” which is the last step in the cycle of narcissistic abuse. Make sure you have him blocked so this cannot happen to you.

If you don’t block him it’s likely because you secretly want this to happen. This is your warning: it’s never worth it.

__kamikaze__ · 2021-09-07T18:45:29+00:00

When they do this they’re looking for an ego boost. They love knowing they can still manipulate you and have options.

thatshadywitch · 2021-09-07T22:11:49+00:00

Yep, 100% true. My ex tried to come back a year and a half after he broke up with me, with a handwritten letter, explicitly saying that he tried his luck on dating apps and didn't find anyone. Now he magically regrets dumping me, and is convinced that our relationship wAs So BeAuTiFuL.

Translation from Scrote Language: you were the only person who actually gave a sh*t about me, listened to my blabbering, and wanted to have sex with me, so now I'd like to have that back please!

Too bad I would never, ever go back to that one-sided relationship. Boy, bye! And thanks for dumping me and setting me free lmao.

MadamePotpourri · 2021-09-07T21:49:46+00:00

Every single one of my exes has come back. Whether I dumped them or they dumped me, it doesn't matter. They all come back. Men do this to all of their exes. Some do it because they aren't having any luck dating and are desperate to get female attention for as little effort possible, some do it because they are in a relationship and are bored and looking to cheat.

Regardless, this is why it's important to block and delete guys after you break up. Never get back together with an ex (he's an ex for a reason and a LVM). Don't give them the attention they crave. Block and delete, radio silence. That's how you keep your peace.

like_onomatopoeia · 2021-09-07T19:50:03+00:00

And he is coming back, because he felt cozy in the nest you made him. Indeed, he told you you were complaining and nagging, he left you on read, he physically left you on the spot, he ignored you, his things were a priority not your well-being, he kind of put effort into it, but not really.

No one changes deep patterns in a short period of time. Choose wisely IF you want to take him back regardless of who broke up.

If you take him back, you’ll see that in 6 months down the road latest if not before, old patterns are coming back.

You sign up for more heartbreak, more trauma bonding and more unhappy moments.

londochig · 2021-09-07T18:45:41+00:00

Yes. So true!! And for some men all of what you said also includes a power and ego trip to see if they still have power and control over you and your emotions!

aquietsword · 2021-09-07T20:33:46+00:00

If he wants to leave, let him go. If he comes back, let him go again.

Breesasha · 2021-09-07T22:49:52+00:00

I've had a few exes come back, one was hoovering for quite some time. He'd pop up every 6 months, staring that he wanted to be a friend and wish we could go "back to how things were". The first time he came back via text, I made the mistake of responding simply to turn him down. The second time he tried to add me on Twitter from a new account he made (because the other was blocked), so I just blocked the new one. The third time, I just changed my number. Clearly he's not gonna get a hint. I'm not interested in moving backwards, after 17 months of no contact, I'm finally over him. All the love is gone, I've seen through the lies, etc.

Its a red flag if anyone (pick me boy/prospective date, ex, or former friend) doesn't respect my choice not to be in contact with them. Regardless if I choose not to text, call, hang out anymore or if I end a friendship/relationship, I don't need to be harassed or explain my rationale. It's my choice and no is a complete thought. It's disrespectful, in my opinion.

modernmedusaa · 2021-09-07T19:19:44+00:00

Yeah they’re just bored & fresh out of supply

If you really meant that much they would of came correct the first time

I would rather be alone than repeat the same old chapter & mistakes again

deadinsidelol69 · 2021-09-08T00:47:47+00:00

This is why I blocked my ex on absolutely everything after I dropped the last of his shit off at his house. No thanks, I'm better off without his NVM behavior.

sarahbae03 · 2021-09-08T01:27:14+00:00

Can I get a hallelujah!

FDS-GFY · 2021-09-09T03:48:22+00:00

After fifteen years, my nvx proposed less than a week after I moved out.

It still makes me angry.

It makes me think of The scene in “the princess bride” where Inigo Montoya finally catches up with Count Duggan. He tells Duggan to offer him anything- his money, anything. Duggan offers it all.

Then Montoya says “I want my father back you son of a bitch” and stabs him.

It’s perfect.

queeninprogress · 2021-09-09T17:43:01+00:00

My dad tried to do this to my mum after their nasty ass divorce lmao (she wasn't having shit)

Title	The real reason your ex left and came back months later
Author	Immediate_Treat5141
Upvotes	523
Comments	22
Date	September 7, 2021 8:57 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/pjja6n/the_real_reason_your_ex_left_and_came_back_months/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/the-real-reason-your-ex-left-and-came-back-months.1067590 https://theredarchive.com/post/1067590

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