It seems to me that PPD guys assume that feelings of low self worth or insecurity is reserved for people who are obese or inexperienced or unattractive. The only other people they assume are insecure are “slutty girls” with high body counts who get “pumped and dumped” regularly by Chads.

This is simply untrue. I had a date this week with a very handsome, fit, and kind man. We immediately hit it off and ended up spending six hours together, neither of us wanting the date to end. There was connection, shared interests and values, and intense chemistry. He kept commenting that this was the best date he’d ever been on and he thought I was beautiful and incredible. I felt the same about him.

Then I got in my head. He is a physician, I am a teacher. I started to feel insecure about my lack of financial success. He used to do sex therapy with patients, I started to feel insecure about my sex skills. He is, IMO better looking than I am and I started to feel less pretty even though he seemed very attracted to me.

The moral of this story is: don’t get in your head and start questioning your worth. If a person is into you and tells you so, believe them. The other point is that every single person has insecurities so you are not alone in that. They may be of different degrees, but your self esteem is something you get to choose.

I talked myself out of those feelings of lower self worth and he and I are spending the whole day together on Sunday. Be your own best friend and be confident in what to DO have to give. If it’s not looks, let it be kindness and humor. If it’s not financial success, learn to make people you meet feel good to be around you. There is a way to be successful in dating if you’re willing to grow as a person.