Why am I rejected by lower SMV women than myself?

Choice-Welder1482 · 2022-06-13T19:59:30+00:00

[permanently deleted]

Peelfest2016 · 2022-06-13T20:08:40+00:00

You’ve gotta go after the girls YOU find attractive. I’m dating a girl that’s a little chubby and a bit older than me. I’m 6’ 2” and 200 pounds of lean muscle. I have a solid career with incredible benefits. I turn heads everywhere I go. Could I get the bleach blonde everybody else drops their jaws for? Yeah probably. Do I want that? No. I want the woman I have now because I find her insanely attractive and we match on a fundamental level through our personalities. Don’t worry about what other people think you should want. Worry about what makes you happy and go for it.

Choice-Welder1482 · 2022-06-13T20:05:59+00:00

Something that my friends and family have told me is that these women may not feel like they would be good enough for me. So they cut it off at the very beginning to keep their dignity. This last girl who said she isnt ready for a relationship, I saw photos of her ex, and he looked very bad. I mean he looked relatively disgusting. Most of my friends and my father have told me that I would probably objectively rate 8 on an attractiveness scale for most people. So I'm not a model but I'm not ugly. But I don't understand why these girls will fuck around with totally nasty trashy dudes with drug problems, but not me, taller, more athletic physique, mores successful, no drug addictions. etc.

AngeloMacon · 2022-06-13T21:32:56+00:00

Sounds like self rejection by the women. You have to aim higher. Men date down is a saying, but that doesn't mean a lot further below you. You have a baseline with your exs, try staying in that wheelhouse or slightly below. You live in a small town, so you're going to have to be a little more proactive past dating apps or hoping one stumbles across your small town business.

vardarac · 2022-06-13T22:55:44+00:00

Probably because you're looking at this more like an equation and less like a relationship where there has to be some emotional excitement and sexual tension. If you don't put those two things in or put something weird in (as I often do) you will tank even if you've got a lot going for you

Choice-Welder1482 · 2022-06-14T01:15:34+00:00

They don’t understand the market right now. Everything is way overpriced.

Also. I’ve done a lot of dating in my life. Every different type and attractiveness level of girl. I can tell you, the very average to ugly ones can be extremely problematic. The hotter girls I’ve dated have all been head over heels enamored with me. I haven’t put my finger on why that is yet. Maybe the ugly girls actually get more attention because guys think they’re easier. Or maybe they have their guard up more. Or they could all feel like they have something to prove so they’re desperately aiming for a guy with maxed out stats they can show off on social media. OR maybe they’re so used to guys ghosting them and the feelings of despair that follow, that they link the behavior with a guy actually being high quality. Or maybe they’re just leaving you before you can leave them.

I don’t know what it is. But I feel you it can affect your confidence when a below average girl you really like is turning hard to get.

Take your families advice and start going for hotter women. It’s scary but I think you’ll find way better results than you’re expecting.

2022-06-14T02:28:18+00:00

Unfortunately, In a dating world, even obese girls have higher smv than all male. A male model might get a hundred match after a week. Obese woman will get thousands within days.

The key is to improve yourself enough to date girls YOU find attractive.

Mc_Dickles · 2022-06-14T04:13:56+00:00

She got a kid… she definitely wants to take it slow

daddysgotanew · 2022-06-13T21:59:11+00:00

Unfortunately, in the modern era, if you are not a MINIMUM of an 8.5 in looks or better, women just don’t care and will treat you like absolute shit. They’ve got everything now. Their own career, their own money, and their own prestige. They want “pretty” men just like men want pretty women because that’s all there is left to conquer for them. There’s not many of those dudes out there, but women don’t care. They’re all after those same few men.

I get told the same stuff as you. Everyone tells me I’m great looking, even hot women around my age. But funnily enough, they’re never actually interested in taking anything further. So the truth is, they’re just being polite. People feel the need to do that for whatever reason. But if you (and I) were actually elite tier in looks, women would be trying to fuck us constantly. The fact that they’re not, and just talking, tells you everything you need to know.

rhofire · 2022-06-13T23:23:05+00:00

What in the fuck am i missing?

I'm going to paste quotes below with all the things you're doing wrong.

We were very in love,

At this stage, you should know that it was infatuation.

I had emotional problems when we lived together

You still have emotional problems.

beautiful, smart, not a hoe,

You have an idealize view of women fuelled by societal conditioning.

We still txt every couple weeks as friends,

You're not friends. You still have feelings for her.

I have been with maybe 2 pretty attractive women since then.

Same as above.

It's so weird though, because I'm not the most buff dude or anything, but I am 6'2", 175 lbs, I have a blue collar business, live in a small town,

Nobody cares.

family and friends all pretty much tell me I'm a good looking dude

Grow up. Also, nobody cares.

no woman is out of my league at all.

This is correct. There are no leagues.

This girl I have been seeing recently is kind of white trash,

You don't like yourself much and so you judge people harshly to feel better about yourself.

but I like her.

No you don't. You just find her physically attractive.

I go to her families house and I shoot darts with her dad, I play with her kid and goof off and just have a fun time drinkin beers with everyone.

You're needy and obsessive.

whnever my friends or family meet them,

Again, grow up. You're a man, stop seeking validation from others.

But then I end up getting rejected/ghosted by these girls who everyone views as below my standards!

Well, you don't have your own opinions, women don't like spineless males. Plus, you look down on them, they're not stupid.

So I honestly don't understand how aiming even HIGHER would result in any more success???

Because then you'd be going for girls you actually like and respect, so there'll be something to reciprocate. Well, the ones you're dealing with are reciprocating too - just that your sentiments towards them are negative.

Even my attractive ex is like

She doesn't want you. Deal with it.

I don't get it.

That's obvious.

The issue is that you're not sexually confident. You don't value yourself as a man. You're too scared to be bold with women. So, you do odd stuff like try to score points by playing with their kid.

What you need to do is give yourself a chance to start from scratch. Accept that you don't know anything about women. Start going out and meeting women.

And, don't be so judgemental. We're all just people.

premedchunsa · 2022-06-14T02:33:07+00:00

You sound like a “nice guy”. I only say this so you can improve, not to be offensive.

Choice-Welder1482 · 2022-06-13T21:28:17+00:00

Cuz your SMV isn’t as high as you think it is….

From what you described you have ok wealth and ok looks since dating apps aren’t working for you

focus_flow69 · 2022-06-13T22:09:03+00:00

Date higher SMV girls then. Don't ask just do. It won't be any harder if you are higher value like you said.

Placated_Venom · 2022-06-14T02:35:27+00:00

It's not just your value you have to take into account, but also her perceived value (no matter how delusional it may be)

VisionsOfVisions · 2022-06-14T06:25:31+00:00

I have the feeling from your description of events that the girls are softly rejecting you so that you can show that you are heads over heels for them. They are pushing you away so that they don't get too attached and you find someone better.

Aim for the stars, man. Yes, you may have a few more initial rejection, but it may be a better match for everyone.

Ohmaygahh · 2022-06-14T14:03:25+00:00

but I am 6'2", 175 lbs

You need to eat at a caloric surplus and lift heavy weights. Often. Starting today.

I'm a good looking dude This girl I have been seeing recently is kind of white trash... I play with her kid, I told her yesterday we should go out on another date... her response was "I want to take things slow and not rush into a relationship"

You need to fucking stop this relationship and get your life in order. Right now. Otherwise your life will be like that of millions of men now, and before you... unremarkable. Missed opportunities.

You are not immortal. You do not have an infinite window of time. You have 24 hrs each day. Use it.

Title	Why am I rejected by lower SMV women than myself?
Author	Choice-Welder1482
Upvotes	5
Comments	44
Date	June 13, 2022 7:50 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/vbkp7k/why_am_i_rejected_by_lower_smv_women_than_myself/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/why-am-i-rejected-by-lower-smv-women-than-myself.1257150 https://theredarchive.com/post/1257150

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