Attention, a blessing or a curse

Makuta_Servaela · 2024-03-10T14:08:26+00:00

The attention I get is as someone who is vulnerable, I think. Either pity or preyed on- which I also think is why men don't really understand why the attention bothers us so much. It's not just that it's "too much", it's that it is a threat. If I don't respond to the attention correctly, it could open me up to harassment, assault, or worse. If I attract the wrong attention (even unintentionally) I am to blame for the result.

Meanwhile, most of what men perceive as the attention they want is through someone who isn't a real threat to them building them up.

januaryphilosopher · 2024-03-10T17:02:39+00:00

I don't get attention unless I specifically seek it out and often not even then. That's fine with me. I'm not special.

Safinated · 2024-03-10T14:57:34+00:00

I assure you that being hit on does for your body does not make your mind feel less lonely

holyskillet · 2024-03-10T16:24:37+00:00

This is going to sound cynical, but guys giving out attention to random women are always the guys you least want attention from. I wish people looked in the mirror more before thinking that their attention is a trophy to anybody.

MistyMaisel · 2024-03-10T14:45:00+00:00

It doesn't decrease the loneliness you feel. To feel like a prized fuck vase is not the same as feeling like a human connected to other humans. Some of my most lonely moments were in relationships or when men were giving me "that sort of attention".

Unwanted or dehumanizing attention is not a benefit. I personally always wished there was a button I could press to turn it off and just be normal.

Commercial_Tea_8185 · 2024-03-10T18:30:19+00:00

It makes me feel like a piece of meat.

How would a creep making a comment letting me know hes thinking about fucking me due to a detached part of my body make me feel less alone? It makes me feel subhuman.

MiddleZealousideal89 · 2024-03-10T17:09:24+00:00

It's never made me feel less lonely. The people who come over to try and get my number aren't approaching me because of who I am as a person, they're approaching me because they think I look good. Attention from someone I know is great, it flatters my ego, and I do feel good because I'm appreciated by someone who is judging me based on more than looks alone. But random dudes on the street or in a bar? It's not particularly meaningful.

jaybalvinman · 2024-03-10T19:32:48+00:00

I dont know about creeps or losers. I have always been able to deal with them appropriately so they have always been a non-issue. But when you are use to getting attention and then one day its gone...that bitchslap is a motherfker.

Also, you should change your line from "women get alot of attention" to "some women get alot of attention" or are unattractive women not included in this conversation?

AutoModerator · 2024-03-10T05:50:46+00:00

Attention!

You can post off topic/jokes/puns as a comment to this Automoderator message.
For "Debate" and "Question for X" Threads: Parent comments that aren't from the target group will be removed, along with their child replies.
If you want to agree with OP instead of challenging their view or if the question is not targeted at you, post it as an answer to this comment.
OP you can choose your own flair according to these guidelines., just press Flair under your post!

Thanks for your cooperation and enjoy the discussion!

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

ConanTheCybrarian · 2024-03-11T10:21:14+00:00

it can be either, depending on the situation

When it gets me complements without creepiness, is respectful of the situation, and/or gets me free stuff, attention is fine.

When I feel unsafe, when someone doesn't respect boundaries, or when it's creepy, it's not great.

howdoiw0rkthisthing · 2024-03-10T17:52:29+00:00

I don’t get much attention but when I do it makes me uncomfortable, kind of like stage fright.

UpbeatInsurance5358 · 2024-03-10T22:56:04+00:00

I never liked it.

AngeCruelle · 2024-03-10T17:37:58+00:00

I've been approached a handful of times in a way I liked and felt comfortable with. My BF is one example. Several times when I was in Japan.

For the most part, I end up not liking it when the guy goes about it in an embarrassing or obnoxious way. Which unfortunately makes up the majority of my experiences with being approached.

Title	Attention, a blessing or a curse
Author	thedarkracer
Upvotes	2
Comments	85
Date	March 10, 2024 5:50 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1bb2yv9/attention_a_blessing_or_a_curse/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/attention-a-blessing-or-a-curse.1426383 https://theredarchive.com/post/1426383

Comments