Girlfriend of six months this is what happened. What to do next?

rdotskip · 2024-05-02T12:07:20+00:00

How do you even get a gf in the first place Jesus Christ

LordPrettyMax · 2024-05-02T10:03:10+00:00

You need to read some books on human communication or something which is quite ironic considering you’re telling her to communicate with you even though you’re heavily lacking in the communication department. You could have literally said anything except for what you said.

Cirrus_Minor · 2024-05-02T12:17:02+00:00

That line about growing a dick has killed me.

Harucifer · 2024-05-02T13:31:19+00:00

Your gf is right and funny ("growing a dick here from my lack of femininity").

You sound like a loser though

norwegiandoggo · 2024-05-02T09:38:44+00:00

This conversation went bad a long time before you got to this part of the conversation

Ulanyouknow · 2024-05-02T13:58:14+00:00

Is this literally how you speak to someone you like?

Thierr · 2024-05-02T09:45:07+00:00

You didn't share the actual conversation, but it sounds like you have some maturing and introspection to do.

BravoPUA · 2024-05-02T13:51:57+00:00

You sound like a dumb retard in your texts

eablokker · 2024-05-02T09:47:26+00:00

What you seem to be communicating with her is your dissatisfaction with her. Saying men deserve head, she’s not feminine enough, she’s combative. Sounds like you don’t actually like her that much.

You could turn it around and find things you appreciate about her and let her know. What you appreciate, grows larger, it appreciates. It encourages more of that. If you want her to be more feminine, whatever that means to you, find some little thing she does that’s feminine and say you appreciate it — she will do more of it. That’s what you want. You start with a little seed of what you want, and you encourage it until it grows into what you’re expecting.

Otherwise you are just encouraging her to be what you don’t want by complaining about it. That’s what she means by giving her low self esteem. She would do what you want if you would only encourage it rather than beat her down.

Hortos · 2024-05-02T13:56:11+00:00

She literally tells you what to do in the last message. She’s clearly invested in you, not sure why, but she’s willing to stick it out if you stop screwing up.

DaygameCode · 2024-05-02T08:59:59+00:00

1 - Never argue with women. Specially over texts. Men who understand women don’t argue with them.

2 - Accusing her of not being feminine, and telling her she is so combative is not gonna make her be more feminine or be less combative. Quite the opposite actually, she is simply going to double down.

Hence why you cannot argue with women, you simply cannot win. Cuz if you “won” the argument she resents you, if you lose it she doesn’t respect you. It’s a lose-lose situation.

Women argue from their emotional side, men argue from their logical mind.

Overall, seems like you wanted to make a joke and she did not take the joke, hence you got upset suggesting that she always takes everything too seriously.

If a woman is always moody, then you need to pay attention at what her emotions are communicating. She said “you never cook so…” to your joke that “men who cook deserve head 24/7”.

What that tells me is that she is being holding resentment for a little while now about something, hence why you feel she is combative. But, rather than understanding where she is coming from, you complain to her about what you want her to be as a girlfriend. Claiming she is not feminine.

Well dude, if she is not feminine it is because you don’t make her comfortable being feminine. You are responsible, and you cannot “win” this by denying your responsibility and shifting it on her.

Now, what could be the reason why she is not?

I don’t know because to do that we need to figure out, when things started to get combative and whether those first moments actually got solved emotionally or you just deluded yourself into thinking they were solved when they were actually not solved only because she seemingly “moved on” even though she probably did not really move on and is tras she just held the resentment for a later time.

You want to communicate to her via a call after you accuse her of things, of course she is not gonna talk. You want honest communication? then you need to avoid the accusatory tone. Talking with women requires understanding and empathy, not attacking them.

You need to tell her: “Listen i thought about it and you are right. I wanna meet up with you and talk about what might have been bothering you, because i admit i haven’t been the most empathetic with you lately and from now on I wanna be a more understanding person. How about we meet for a coffee tomorrow and have a heart to heart conversation.”

Now, don’t come now with “oh that’s like saying sorry, i’m too masculine for that, or any of that bullshit” She is your girlfriend, not a random chick you made out with at a nightclub once.

Stop accusing her, stop telling her what she should be like or what you expect from her in a demanding voice, and be understanding and realise that women will be submissive and feminine when they feel safe and comfortable with their man to do it, not when the man’s furiously demands it.

No-Grade-5057 · 2024-05-02T11:07:07+00:00

You, Sir, are not seductive. I would be so offended and hurt if my man talked to me like that. Learn to be more masculine you ass hat

EP_CJ · 2024-05-02T13:42:51+00:00

Move on, looks like you fucked it up a long time ago

-Twyptophan- · 2024-05-02T15:53:01+00:00

https://youtu.be/nBcGiFTQGdA?si=CKLPuj0bztmxI5_j

MO_drps_knwldg · 2024-05-02T16:04:09+00:00

Dude, you’ve got a lot to learn about true masculine frame. You sound like a little boy

Trey2022 · 2024-05-02T15:32:45+00:00

You can’t insult her and then blame her for not wanting to pick up a call and communicate. Good luck but it seems like yall have a lot to work through if both of yall even want that

Cool_depths99 · 2024-05-02T16:32:25+00:00

Damn bro. That convo would make any girl drier than the Sahara desert

SituationOk6836 · 2024-05-02T16:39:32+00:00

Go to therapy

Ghuytv · 2024-05-02T11:03:15+00:00

First off don’t ever argue over text with a woman or anyone for that matter. If you need to have a tough conversation it happens in person. Text should only be for logistics to meet in person. Secondly, why are you acting like a little girl? She was obviously shit testing you and you failed big time. Instead of responding to it with cocky funny you instead got your panties in a bunch and freaked out.

safestuff987 · 2024-05-02T15:11:07+00:00

Gentlemen, if you want your girlfriend to be more feminine and less combative this is a perfect example of what not to do.

Gonna be hard to recover from this one, but going forward I would suggest:

Don't unironically send sexist memes to women, just don't. It never goes over well.
Learn to put your money where your mouth is. She caught you in a lie there.

urMirin · 2024-05-02T17:04:56+00:00

You dont tell a woman to "be more feminine". You find a woman who is already feminine, and you make her yours. Fucking loser.

SaaSWriters · 2024-05-02T16:00:07+00:00

You're not going to listen but, still. I'll tell you something.

You need to run. Let her go when she leaves. When she comes back or tries to lure you back in, don't take her back.

Run.

mmmfritz · 2024-05-02T14:08:59+00:00

Put on some lipstick and a dress then go around treating everyone with kindness and respect. You’ll learn a lot about what a man/women isn’t, and hopefully learn some important information about yourself and how you fit in this world.

Gtoast · 2024-05-02T09:54:34+00:00

Don’t get caught up in any analysis/deconstruction of your joke. If she was feeling you, your joke would have landed with amused and playful shunning at worst. Her friends say shit that’s 10x more fucked up and she finds it hilarious and so naughty! Instead, she doesn’t even respect you enough to dignify your request for sincere communication with a response. For her, it’s just another opportunity to take a shot at you.

There’s no play here and no respect. There’s no communication. There’s no chill -just attack attack attack. And this is her on the eve of moving in? Hell no she can’t move in. She can’t even have an adult conversation with you. And if she can’t be trusted to communicate with you, what are you even doing. End it and move on.

Title	Girlfriend of six months this is what happened. What to do next?
Author	xotakes
Upvotes	0
Comments	37
Date	May 2, 2024 8:34 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1ciakzl/girlfriend_of_six_months_this_is_what_happened/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/girlfriend-of-six-months-this-is-what-happened.1517110 https://theredarchive.com/post/1517110

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