What do you do if a girl doesn't have time for a date right away?

jclassic521 · 2024-08-21T17:42:00+00:00

You have to appear as a guy thats not chasing her and has more important things to do, honestly you might not get her, and you have to be ok with that. Shoot her a text in a couple weeks and tell her you’re free

FuckdaFireDepartment · 2024-08-21T17:45:35+00:00

If I try to set up a date and the chick does not have time for a date, or does not give me a follow up time that does work for her, I’m gone like dust in the wind. If they’re not interested then why would I want to go out with them? I’ve learned that if it’s not an emphatic yes, it’s a no.

DaygameCode · 2024-08-21T18:38:27+00:00

Assume they are not interested and move on. Texting more or less is not gonna change the fact that if a woman says she doesn't have time now, 99% of the time it is just an excuse to not go out with you.

They are not just gonna say "i don't have time ever", and they don't wanna say "No" clearly because they feel awkard about it, so they just say "im busy for the next few weeks" hoping you get the hint on your own.

That is why you feel like no matter what you do it doesn't work, that if you text too much they lose interest because you think you come across as needy, and if you don't text enough then they lose interest as well.

Well it's because they are actually just turning you down and nothing you do will change that, they only gave the number out of politeness but are not really excited about seeing you again.

When a girl truly likes you she has time to meet, simple as that. There could be a tiny chance she genuinely wouldn't mind, but you have far more chance to meet new girls and sleep with them than trying to go through all the hoops, second guessing for weeks or months.

dbastrid100 · 2024-08-21T22:04:00+00:00

If they're interested, they'll make time. 2 weeks is more than enough time to determine if they're interested or not.

Blitted_Master · 2024-08-21T17:42:58+00:00

Disregard her and talk to other women. Life’s too short to play games with low-mid interest prospects. If she’s really interested after the two weeks then she can let you know.

Jironasaurus · 2024-08-21T17:46:49+00:00

I just continue texting, and keep things fun and playful. Longest I took was slightly more than a month, because she was observing the Month of Lent. But all that texting and rapport meant we were DTF when we met.

SURFcityUTAH · 2024-08-21T18:45:57+00:00

If she doesn't have time the next week or 2, take it as a sign and never talk to her again.

Dandys3107 · 2024-08-21T19:54:27+00:00

You don't have to immediately get bitter and pessimistic, but if she is so busy that she can't make some time for romance or love for so long, then ask yourself if you want to wait for her all the time until she gets done with her higher priorities. Evaluate what will be the best for you and remember that women tend to not really keep their words congruent with their actions.

CharmingRejector · 2024-08-21T20:09:01+00:00

If I suggest something and she can't, I might check if she's available at some other time. If she's not available then either, I tell her these exact words:

"No problem. Just shoot me a text when you're ready to meet."

This is called "shooting the ball into her corner." It's now her job to get back to you because you already gave her plenty of chances. If she likes you, she will.

Then I go about my day. Moreover, I won't ever wait for her. I'll make an effort to meet new women. And I'll get involved with hobbies and work. If she calls, great. If she doesn't, I'll have a new date with someone else.

LeftHovercraft · 2024-08-21T20:50:14+00:00

There isn't really a right answer here IMO. Looking at the comments, people are either saying you text or you don't text. So overall I think the answer is: you probably won't see her again.

But, depending on how much yall were vibing when you first met her, gauge that as what you should do. If you had a quick interaction, got the number, and that's it – then probably don't text her that much lol because you're a stranger still.

If you guys had a longer conversation and deeper connection when you met her, then maybe shoot her some occasional texts like every 3-4 days.

But to be honest – don't expect these situations to go well. It should be easy to set up and see each other. If it's not, then just mentally start moving on. It's a hail mary at that point.

HCHDGSH · 2024-08-21T21:37:22+00:00

"Cool, well hit me up when you're ready to make it happen." and then just forget about it. If she can't break off an hour anywhere to go for a drink she's probably not that interested. But for the sake of argument, maybe you met the busiest woman in the world. If she only remains interested because you feel the need to text her everyday to keep the lead warm she's not that interested either. That's way too much thought to be putting into a woman you barely know.

UniverPlankton · 2024-08-21T17:39:39+00:00

Interested to see the responses because I "lost" a girl because of such situation.

appolonysian · 2024-08-21T18:25:16+00:00

My go to move is to just say (assuming you’re on an app to begin with), “no worries. Shoot me your number and we’ll set something up later.” Don’t overthink it; just hit her up in a week or so.

catchthecum · 2024-08-21T19:20:48+00:00

https://imgur.com/a/OOEvG2U

berzerker5000 · 2024-08-21T23:48:29+00:00

If she leaves you on read, follow the no contact for two weeks rule, then hit her up again with something funny. Never double text her. You want to remeber that you have important things going on so is fine to dissapear for a few days or what not. If she is attracted enough to you it won’t matter. If she isn’t then oh well on to the next. Also remeber that lots of chicks are just texting you for validation and have no intention of meeting up ever.

godofwar108 · 2024-08-22T00:57:43+00:00

If you had multiple options, you wouldn't have asked this question 😉

theasianplayboy · 2024-08-21T20:33:37+00:00

Everyone’s response here is off the mark. If there’s mutual attraction but logistics and scheduling are bad (she’s traveling, you’re traveling like I often am), then you need to put her in a holding pattern game.

Attractive women are constantly busy with other social obligations, even if they like you, so their attention is naturally divided. To keep her interest, you have to drop in occasional reminders that you exist and are living a life of abundance.

For example, if you’re at a Michelin star restaurant, shoot her a quick message saying you thought you saw her twin there while including a very aesthetic video/pic (like actual good quality not a basic bitch ass photo). This keeps you on her radar without coming off as needy.

This is also where Instagram shines. It’s perfect for keeping multiple girls in a long-term holding pattern, but it only works if you’ve curated your profile well and have at least intermediate, if not expert, online game abilities.

Also, generally speaking, anything over a week and your chances of a meet-up diminish rapidly. That’s why you need to transition to a different form of long-term holding pattern game if the initial timeframe falls through.

daddyvow · 2024-08-22T04:20:08+00:00

After it’s established that she is interested but just not available at the moment - I taper off the texting, wait a couple weeks and reach out again.

As a general rule though if she’s down then she would make time.

bwoidem · 2024-08-22T05:30:38+00:00

Was just in a situation exactly like this. Met a girl off an app and she couldn't meet that weekend but we planned for the next week.

She was never busy for two weeks per se but she would say things like "I can't do this week but next week works."

We had one date tentatively scheduled and two others firmly scheduled during that month. The first one (tentatively scheduled) she seemed to lose a bit of interest when I tried to finalize the date and didn't open my message when I asked her when she would be free. I texted her a week later and she said she could do the following week. I set a date but got super sick and had to cancel. She understood but "didn't know when next she would be free" I panicked and decided to text her saying I could meet that night even though I was sick cause I was on antibiotics and she didn't respond (ouch). A week later I decided to hail mary and said i was going to check out some restaurant and if she was free she should come. She was down and came.

Interest was great during the date and I could tell i raised her interest. She even texted me two days after the date asking how I was doing which was a good sign because she had never texted me first once during the previous month. Unfortunately on the date she told me that she's moving out of the country for at least a few months and maybe even forever. The next week, even though right after the date her interest had visibly risen, it went down again. I'm assuming it's cause she's moving and honestly, I might never see her again.

Anyway lol. I think it's worth doing this type of chasing if you feel like you won't see this type of girl ever again. I'm usually not this persistent but she has all the qualities I was looking for in a wife so I followed up way more that normal. In my case she was probably acting weird because she knew she was moving.

I would just keep texting light. Reach out maybe twice or max 3 times a week. When she's back set a date, time, place. "Hey I'm checking out roscoes pizza at 8pm on September 4, if you're free you should join" and see what she says. If she doesn't respond or says she can't without a reschedule, dead it. If she reschedule or better yet comes then you're game.

zebekias · 2024-08-22T19:31:23+00:00

In my experience texting aimlessly doesn’t end well. Transition to video call or phone asap, and create comfort. The date will come, don’t push for it.

2024-08-21T19:03:50+00:00

If she “doesn’t have time,” she’s not interested, buddy.

GarugasRevenge · 2024-08-21T21:12:40+00:00

Ask her what she's doing instead.

Make fun of what she's got planned, "okay cool 🙄".

MrAnonPoster · 2024-08-21T18:01:22+00:00

It means she is not that interested. Move on. Or at least tell her "ok, cool" and let her decide she wants to chase you.

Jfk, how difficult is it to understand. Two weeks? Two weeks? Do you think if Leonardo DiCaprio asked her out she would not have time for two weeks? No? Ok, how about a 6' model looking dude driving a 2024 911?

reeling_in_the_fear · 2024-08-21T18:23:20+00:00

Your text game is just bad. If a girl really is interested but just isn't free for some time you should absolutely be able to keep her warm through minimal texting (like 1-2 messages per day max).

I had this exact situation recently. Matched with a girl at the end of June on tinder, took my time getting the number bcs she was giving me problems, then eventually get the number and she says she's not for another month and a half due to college exams. I kept her warm exchanging 1 text every other day, and eventually met her last Sunday for a date (got LMR so no lay but it was close), and she's excited to meet me again.

It can be done, it's not even hard, you just need to improve your text game.

Title	What do you do if a girl doesn't have time for a date right away?
Author	kartoffelninja
Upvotes	34
Comments	39
Date	August 21, 2024 5:28 PM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1exvmf4/what_do_you_do_if_a_girl_doesnt_have_time_for_a/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/what-do-you-do-if-a-girl-doesnt-have-time-for-a.1527930 https://theredarchive.com/post/1527930

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