The disrespect from her becomes normal and is an afterthought. You’re two roommates living separate lives and only come together to make decisions for child related matters or finances. You forgot the last time you heard the words I’m sorry. You forgot the last time she asked how’s your day going, or how you’re doing. You forgot the last time she actually initiated sex, or generally what romantic non sexual intimacy feels like. You forgot the last time you slept in the same bed for more than a week. You forgot the last time she said a nice compliment to you. You forgot the last time you were both laughing hysterically at something random or dumb. You forgot the last time you wanted to take a morning or afternoon walk with her, just to roam around together. You’ve tried doing everything her way to the last detail, being the perfect partner, but it’s still an emotional dead end. Most attempts at a date night usually end up getting blown off or fall through the last minute, and it is what it is. There are more bad memories than good, or at least the bad ones are fresher in your mind. You feel more alone when you’re together than you actually do alone. You’re used to the feeling of simply being a walking ATM machine, childcare provider, errand runner, task jockey, and you’re no longer upset by it. You’re used to being an afterthought, at the very bottom of her list after kids, work, friends, family, and everyone and everything else. You’re used to her making solo plans without you and it no longer bothers you. You’re used to her treating your parents with disdain. You’re used to her talking to you like a bossy work manager would speak to a subordinate, rather than a feminine romantic partner talking to her spouse. You’re used to expecting nothing from her for you, and having everything expected from you in return.