Do You Guys Give Women Who Flake On You A Second Chance? Why or Why Not?

RazmussenDaMan · 2025-11-29T19:04:54+00:00

Well I significantly lower the amount the effort I will put in if I do, It's a case by case basis. If I were to have taken them out the first time around, If they flake and come back around again I get straight to the point and ask them to come over since I don't really care at this point. Usually I loose quite alot of respect for the women too and immediately downgrade them to fuckbuddy in my mind

Edit: realized I said almost the same thing word for word as the first comment. Definitely validates this strategy

gazzy82 · 2025-11-29T19:19:27+00:00

Don't do it because it gives them a sense of pride. Move on and just put it in any hole you can find

Esoplexis · 2025-11-29T19:48:59+00:00

Sometimes life happens and something does truly come up. However, a person who is interested should ideally communicate that as early as possible and IMO should take the initiative to reschedule. They should volunteer their availability or bonus: they suggest plans for the next date. If they do that sure I’ll will give them chance. But this rarely happens as we all know, so definitely they get less effort if any going forward.

YetzirahToAhssiah · 2025-11-29T20:25:22+00:00

Absolute rules like this have cost me a lot of opportunities with women.

I'd say, give them one or two chances.

Trip_seize · 2025-11-29T19:28:43+00:00

Flake on me once, shame on you...

thai-rhone · 2025-11-29T19:03:16+00:00

I do give them a second chance but they end up on the end of the wait list. I give her space by prioritising the rest of my roster.

Also if she flakes on a date, the next potential meet up would be less of an initiative. For example if we were to meet for drinks at a bar before, she would now have to meet at my house directly.

There should be some sort of penalty for wasting your time prior

HedgehogOk3756 · 2025-11-29T23:01:34+00:00

Nope - just make sure you have a high volume of dates and you won't feel the need to deal with that BS. Move on as they are already putting you in a lower position

FanAccomplished7407 · 2025-11-29T21:52:12+00:00

Why would i give her a second chance if she's willing to waste my time there's no fucking point if a woman NEVER follows through

FederalBlood · 2025-11-29T22:58:25+00:00

If women flake I put the onus on planning to meet up on them. They’ll have to do the footwork to get in my good graces.

Cornichonsale · 2025-11-29T20:41:50+00:00

Be gulible and then flake on them... use bait if necessary.

Western-Month-3877 · 2025-11-29T20:27:12+00:00

I still talk to them, as in replying to their convo but not as in initiating the talk. Going out? Probably not unless they apologized for what they did and again, initiated the 2nd chance.

GalickBanger · 2025-11-29T21:25:27+00:00

Most of the time no, but if she’s really bad, or if I’ve had sex with her before I might

WhusssuName4547 · 2025-11-29T21:55:25+00:00

Nope.. I don’t play them type of games

V4refugee · 2025-11-29T23:20:03+00:00

Depends on how bored I am and what the plans are. Basically, the second date is just an excuse for me to get out of the house if I have nothing better to do. If she shows up then cool, if she doesn’t then I’m already out and I’ll try to meet people or reach out to other people who may want to come hang out.

Siyuen_Tea · 2025-11-30T00:05:13+00:00

Depends. I try to do things where I'm not relying on her being there at the beginning. So if I'm taking her out to eat, it's somewhere i would've gone myself anyway. Same for going to club. The only thing I'll do is have her set up the next thing. Only 2 requirements. One, i want to do it myself anyway and 2 she's setting it up within my timeframe. Basically, make it her turn to put a little effort, it's not that complicated. The idea with it being things i want to do means i can peel off if I don't like how things are going and hang out with someone else if not simply enjoy myself

Now stood up on something that was meant to be just us, then I'll fall back to the top one. But since I'll most likely be annoyed, I'll just push the date back enough for me to find someone else interesting. If i do, then the first girl gets dropped. I don't like to cheat and juggle. It just isn't fun for me.

Deeper in, it pretty much depends on whether i think it's a case of " shit happens" vs lost interest. At this point, I'll be honest and say it's all emotions. Sometimes if she's just a bit of an air head, i find it cute. Other times, I'll feel like I'm dating a literal moron and get mad. And honestly, there is also a time or 2 where i lost interest and just needed the excuse. I'll be the last person to claim a saint card.

Roneffect · 2025-11-30T06:21:43+00:00

Hell no. Also I feel if they want a second chance they calculated a mistake they made and they want it back to benefit. Like say you could possibly have something going for u in the future and a woman who flakes finds out about that opportunity. She may want a second chance because she wants to come along for the ride. In my opinion when it comes to women if they want a second chance it’s not cause they feel bad it’s because they feel they screwed up something that could benefit them.

Bigballerway93 · 2025-11-30T08:23:22+00:00

Women that flake on me do so bc they weren’t really interested in the first place. Can’t give someone a second chance if they aren’t looking for that in the first place

babnick · 2025-11-30T09:51:37+00:00

Reading the comments here and some of you don't know the difference between a flake and something genuinely coming up. Just like some people don't know the difference between being friends and being in the "friend zone". Flake is when a woman cancels a date for no apparent reason. Then any self-respecting man should delete her number and move on.

Something genuinely coming up could be work or family-related or other emergencies. That is not flaking. When this happens. then it is on HER to reschedule for another time. If she doesn't, then she doesn't respect your time and then you should move on. It sounds harsh but a man who loses frame loses respect.

Ivabighairy1 · 2025-11-29T19:45:05+00:00

No. Too many options.

Alarmed_Box1198 · 2025-11-30T00:27:23+00:00

Twice is my limit. It is within the realm of possibility something comes up the first time. Second time is a pattern and it doesn't even matter whether she's telling the truth or not. I don't want any association with someone who can't manage their time that badly even if they're kind and honest.

Darth_Abe · 2025-11-30T01:49:55+00:00

IMO it depends on the girl. I’d do believe in second chances but I also believe one should know when to let go and move on.

thenuttyhazlenut · 2025-11-30T02:18:04+00:00

Never. Flakey wishy washy behavior completely turns me off

Sulla314 · 2025-11-30T04:56:16+00:00

Depends on how.

IcyManufacturer7480 · 2025-11-30T08:02:41+00:00

lackatacker · 2025-11-30T11:21:46+00:00

Depends on the context

InternationalPlum11 · 2025-11-30T12:43:30+00:00

This happened to me yesterday. 1st time ever.

splittingxheadache · 2025-11-30T15:49:20+00:00

JackSquirts · 2025-11-30T18:03:42+00:00

They're recategorized and it depends on the specific terms. Flat out ghosting - straight to the "hookup only" bin. A pretty strong connection, intense attraction, and a solid excuse - sure, but I'm keeping a certain distance until she demonstrates it was indeed a fluke thing.

DaLonelyOne1 · 2025-11-30T19:01:38+00:00

Yes, but only once more, I tell them straight up that I don't like that but I believe in second chances and that'll be their final chance

SgtSplacker · 2025-12-01T00:10:49+00:00

It really all depends on the type of girl. I can read people pretty well. That and seeing the effort to reschedule typically does it for me.

ThatDarnSmell · 2025-12-01T00:47:56+00:00

It depends. Plans can change and no one's completely obligated to drop everything in their life for a stranger. If she reaches out and apologizes with a request for a reschedule, fine. Perhaps plan the date somewhere in the cavity of where you would be going anyway in case she does flake again. But if she does flake twice in a row it's probably best to move on in most circumstances.

ThatGworl_forever97 · 2025-12-01T05:04:14+00:00

What do you consider as flake on you??

devares · 2025-12-01T09:41:32+00:00

absolutely not.

triple_life · 2025-12-01T11:24:41+00:00

I have given her multiple chances and they were the worst mistakes of my life. Never again.

Broad-Cranberry-9050 · 2025-12-02T19:22:15+00:00

In a perfect world i would say it's better if it's over. Once you take someone back after they flake on you, more times than not you are showing them you need them more than they need you and that' a recipe for disaster.

But i will say it's a case by case basis. If you mean flake like something happened and they let you know on time and felt bad about it, ill give them another chance but if you have a 2nd incident happen then im out. If it's someone who didnt even give you the decency of a text or call or their excuse is just whatever then it's better to be out.

bafun13 · 2025-11-29T19:06:19+00:00

don't end up in the possibility to flake lol

Lola_a_l-eau · 2025-11-29T21:30:02+00:00

Never been flaked yet, but this comes when you invite them to date prematurely... or those who are not in. Been flaked by fake friends, but for this I deleted their contact (different story).

If they flake and want the date, then they come on my rules

Title	Do You Guys Give Women Who Flake On You A Second Chance? Why or Why Not?
Author	United-Implement-382
Upvotes	25
Comments	55
Date	November 29, 2025 6:56 PM UTC (7 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1p9wpj3/do_you_guys_give_women_who_flake_on_you_a_second/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/do-you-guys-give-women-who-flake-on-you-a-second.1567714 https://theredarchive.com/post/1567714

Comments