~ archived since 2018 ~

I fell back into the red pill content, it's very addictive and it awakens insecurities in me.

Flourescendrama

January 23, 2026

3 upvotes

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/r/exredpill/comments/1ql17ri/i_fell_back_into_the_red_pill_content_its_very/

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Post Information

Title	I fell back into the red pill content, it's very addictive and it awakens insecurities in me.
Author	Flourescendrama
Upvotes	3
Comments	94
Date	January 23, 2026 7:59 PM UTC (6 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/1ql17ri/i_fell_back_into_the_red_pill_content_its_very/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/i-fell-back-into-the-red-pill-content-its-very.1571810 https://theredarchive.com/post/1571810

Comments

[–]ooa3603 34 points35 points36 points 6 months ago (36 children) | Copy Link

[–]Polish_Girlz 6 points7 points8 points 6 months ago (17 children) | Copy Link

[–]ooa3603 10 points11 points12 points 6 months ago* (16 children) | Copy Link

It's annoying because people take these labels way too seriously to the point of anxious neuroticism.

In the aggregate, men and women innately share more traits than differentiates them. Think a venn diagram, with overlapping circles The gender roles are just a generalistic way to assign the differentiating traits to each of the sexes.

BUT, those traits are not fixed or even mutually exclusive. The differences matter, but they are not the whole picture. A healthy man is not supposed to be some domineering emotionally void invulnerable alpha , and a healthy woman is not supposed to be some physically weak, indecisive and anxiety ridden pushover.

The problem is that people with weak self esteem from absorbing unrealistic and bad social values get anxious and insecure about their identity because deep down they know they aren't actually like the socialized ideals they are conditioned to believe in. So they turn up the differentiating traits to stupid extremes in an attempt to strengthen their weak sense of self and eliminate insecurity.

Guys go way too hard into never showing weakness, won't follow directions etc, anything that proves that they are so very manly.

Women go way too hard into "being soft", lose the ability to be decisive and essentially infantilize themselves to prove that they're so very feminine.

Both turn into flanderized, annoying versions of themselves.

A healthy man is supposed to have feminine traits too.

A healthy woman is supposed to have masculine traits too.

Else how would they be able to understand each other? Or even be functional human beings? There needs to be plenty of emotional sensitivity and nurturing in men because they would be terribly abusive boyfriends, brothers, fathers otherwise.

Just as much as there needs to be plenty of assertiveness and leadership in women, or they'd be terrible pushover mothers, girlfriends, sisters otherwise

[+]SnooDonuts7261 -7 points-6 points-5 points 6 months ago (15 children) | Copy Link

[–]Flourescendrama[S] 2 points3 points4 points 6 months ago (11 children) | Copy Link

[+]SnooDonuts7261 -6 points-5 points-4 points 6 months ago* (10 children) | Copy Link

A lot of the red pill concepts sound true because on some level they are (take care of your body/finances/business, have hobbies, be confident and charming, take initiative as a man, etc), it's just that there is a lot of distortion and selfishness/manipulation/insecurity thrown in.

One big thing in the red pill was how a man had to "be on his mission" and have something he was pursuing that was bigger than women and approval. The biblical model says the man should prioritize God and the purpose God has for his life and pursue excellence in all areas of his life. It also says men should lead the household, and protect and provide their wives and families. This requires true strength and true confidence that only comes from a man knowing he is a son of God as well as God's direct help.

The wives are to submit to the husband's leadership and be a nurturing and supportive presence in their lives, provided that he is submitted to God, and also the husband is commanded to LOVE and HONOR their wives in a Christlike manner, even to lay down their lives for them. This is an important point that the other extreme (feminism) misses when they criticize the submission requirement. The leadership of the husband is for the benefit of the wife and the family as a whole above his own.

It also commands believers to not withhold sex from their partners, unless they decide to dedicate themselves to prayer for a period of time.

The biblical model is literally everything that is right with the redpill but ordered to selflessness and love.

[–]HelenHavok 5 points6 points7 points 6 months ago* (3 children) | Copy Link

The biblical model was developed during a time when women were property and men could not only marry, but take slaves and concubines. It is arranged to benefit men primarily and women secondarily through men’s defense and provision of their property (ie their women, children, slaves, and livestock). Modernizing this bronze/iron-age model to make it more palatable to people today and using terms like “honor” and “cherish” does not mitigate the control and ownership underlying it.

There is literally nothing right or moral about having to “submit” to another person and give them sex on demand. We do not live in a society where women must be guarded at the gates. I would protect my husband from harm and he would protect me. I do not need him to structure his entire life around leading, controlling, and protecting me as evidence of his love. And I do not owe him sex if he does so. We are a union, but we have agency and our bodies are still our own. A biblical model has created and justified tyrants and abusers in homes for millennia and will continue to do so.

[–]SnooDonuts7261 -2 points-1 points0 points 6 months ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]HelenHavok 3 points4 points5 points 6 months ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]SnooDonuts7261 -1 points0 points1 point 6 months ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

If the husband is truly submitted to God and the husband is truly putting his wife and family's needs above his own, then yes, the husband can make the last call. If the wife vehemently disagrees with a decision the husband should take care to assess if he is truly listening to her and his motivations, as well as consult what God is saying to him. Most of the time when the wife vehemently disagrees with something he is not listening, though not always.

If either of those things are not happening and he is making decisions out of selfishness and entitlement then he is simply walking in sin and if part of a church community he will be disciplined by his pastor, and yes, God himself. To consistently make decisions that benefit him over her and a pattern of abuse is considered a breaking of the covenant and grounds for divorce in many churches. Leadership is for service, not for dictatorship, and something like that does not reflect Christ's love for his people at all.

The sex part does not mean coercion also, of course rape and non-consensual sex are gravely sinful. It is addressing a pattern that many unhealthy marriages fall into of ever-decreasing sex and overall intimacy because of unresolved issues.

The bottom line is that a marriage should reflect Christ's character from both parties (humility, patience, kindness, sacrificial love, faithfulness), if it doesn't look like that it is not following the covenant.

[–]Flourescendrama[S] 5 points6 points7 points 6 months ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]SnooDonuts7261 -1 points0 points1 point 6 months ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Flourescendrama[S] 3 points4 points5 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Stargazer1919 2 points3 points4 points 6 months ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]meleyys 3 points4 points5 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

There is so much wrong with this. Firstly, feminism is not "the other extreme." It is the radical idea that women are human beings, with all the rights that entails.

Secondly, the "biblical model" ignores several basic realities. One is that men are not innately built for leadership any more than women are. Anyone of any gender can be a good or bad leader.

Another is that everyone should always have the right to refuse sex, because bodily autonomy is a thing.

A third is that there are countless people out there who don't fit into these prescribed gender norms. I'm a woman. I have no interest in children and need to be the dominant one in sex/romance. My boyfriend is submissive and far better at managing household things than I am. The biblical model would never work for us. We weren't taught to be like this, either; it's not that feminism has warped us into something we're not or whatever. We are just both inherently disinclined to conform to patriarchal gender roles.

[–]ooa3603 2 points3 points4 points 6 months ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Flourescendrama[S] 0 points1 point2 points 6 months ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]ooa3603 3 points4 points5 points 6 months ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

[+]Flourescendrama[S] -12 points-11 points-10 points 6 months ago (17 children) | Copy Link

[–]mylesaway2017 17 points18 points19 points 6 months ago* (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]Flourescendrama[S] -1 points0 points1 point 6 months ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]mylesaway2017 5 points6 points7 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Impressive-Regret550 0 points1 point2 points 4 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]watsername 14 points15 points16 points 6 months ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]Flourescendrama[S] -5 points-4 points-3 points 6 months ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]MCthaitea 9 points10 points11 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]rizzo1717 14 points15 points16 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]watsername 10 points11 points12 points 6 months ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Flourescendrama[S] 0 points1 point2 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]d3rp7d3rp 12 points13 points14 points 6 months ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Flourescendrama[S] 5 points6 points7 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]meleyys 7 points8 points9 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Either_Bobcat_4106 5 points6 points7 points 6 months ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Polish_Girlz 0 points1 point2 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]HelenHavok 2 points3 points4 points 6 months ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

Have you ever watched the show Deadliest Catch? There’s a guy on that show named Jake Anderson who is incredibly emotional and sensitive. He feels things deeply, cries easily, and communicates his feelings. But he’s simultaneously doing one of the most physically demanding and dangerous jobs in the world, has a wife and several children, and worked his way up from nothing to provide for them. Everyone loves the guy - his bosses, his coworkers, his family. He’s one of the best real examples of positive, healthy masculinity I’ve ever seen in media. You might need to watch from the beginning, but it’s worth checking out for an example of a regular dude that displays emotional vulnerability, but is still beloved by everyone as a masculine guy. TRP wants to convince you that someone like this is weak or a beta that won’t win women. But there are many ways to be a good man and there are women out there for all types.

[–]Flourescendrama[S] 1 point2 points3 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]AssistTemporary8422 22 points23 points24 points 7 months ago (45 children) | Copy Link

[+]Flourescendrama[S] -8 points-7 points-6 points 7 months ago* (44 children) | Copy Link

[–]beigs 19 points20 points21 points 6 months ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Flourescendrama[S] 11 points12 points13 points 6 months ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]beigs 10 points11 points12 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]VictrolaBK 12 points13 points14 points 6 months ago (14 children) | Copy Link

[–]Flourescendrama[S] -2 points-1 points0 points 6 months ago (13 children) | Copy Link

[–]UrMomDotCom666 24 points25 points26 points 6 months ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]karatecorgi 11 points12 points13 points 6 months ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]meleyys 11 points12 points13 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]NoRefrigerator267 1 point2 points3 points 6 months ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]VictrolaBK 3 points4 points5 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]VictrolaBK 8 points9 points10 points 6 months ago (5 children) | Copy Link

[–]Flourescendrama[S] 0 points1 point2 points 6 months ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]VictrolaBK 8 points9 points10 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

How do you define extroverted? Being extroverted doesn't mean being the center of attention in a room full of people, it means being able to talk to the person sitting next to you at a dinner party, in line at the store, across the floor at a gathering... Are you able to do those things? Are you hoping that someone else is going to take the first step and reach out to you? How are you making yourself available to meet people?

People often use the word protective as a euphemism for "controlling". But what does protective mean to you? Protective of her boundaries? Protective of her space? Protective of her ability to live her life in the way she chooses?

What does loving mean? Does it mean accepting you without criticism? Does it mean supporting you through your difficulties? Does it mean overlooking physical flaws and seeing the person within?

But to get back to my previous question: what about you is interesting, fun, and attractive? What are your hobbies? What's your social life like? How do you have fun with people? What interests are you pursuing in your free time? Are you taking care of yourself physically? What about you makes you a desirable partner?

[–]HelenHavok 5 points6 points7 points 6 months ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Flourescendrama[S] 3 points4 points5 points 6 months ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]HelenHavok 4 points5 points6 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

That sounds really healthy and nice.

It’s good for both partners to do some occasional introspection and communication to make sure protectiveness doesn’t blur into controlling behavior. After all, women can definitely be controlling too. For instance, it may be comforting and feel like caring to one partner to always have locations shared, but it may feel intrusive or oppressive to the other person (my husband and I do not track each other’s locations, for example, but my best friend and her partner find great peace in knowing they can always see where their loved one is). But the goal is that we’re both on the same page.

Then there’s actual control posing as protection - dictating what types of outfits they shouldn’t wear, lest they get unwanted attention, barring other relationships due to perceived toxicity, not allowing them to leave the house at night because of fears of car accidents or predators…these all originate with good intentions to protect your partner, but they become controlling when one partner is dictating or coercing (through anger, sadness, ignoring or other emotional manipulation).

[–]Stargazer1919 4 points5 points6 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]meleyys 1 point2 points3 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]HelenHavok 10 points11 points12 points 6 months ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]OkChoice4135 7 points8 points9 points 6 months ago (18 children) | Copy Link

[–]Flourescendrama[S] -2 points-1 points0 points 6 months ago (17 children) | Copy Link

[–]OkChoice4135 10 points11 points12 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]karatecorgi 3 points4 points5 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]meleyys 5 points6 points7 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]bookishwayfarer -2 points-1 points0 points 6 months ago* (13 children) | Copy Link

[–]mylesaway2017 8 points9 points10 points 6 months ago (9 children) | Copy Link

[+]bookishwayfarer -7 points-6 points-5 points 6 months ago (8 children) | Copy Link

[–]mylesaway2017 9 points10 points11 points 6 months ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]bookishwayfarer -2 points-1 points0 points 6 months ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]mylesaway2017 4 points5 points6 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]HelenHavok 3 points4 points5 points 6 months ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[+]bookishwayfarer 0 points1 point2 points 6 months ago* (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]HelenHavok 1 point2 points3 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]mylesaway2017 1 point2 points3 points 6 months ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]bookishwayfarer1 point 6 months ago [recovered] | Copy Link

[–]OkChoice4135 3 points4 points5 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]meleyys 1 point2 points3 points 6 months ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[+]bookishwayfarer -1 points0 points1 point 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]AssistTemporary8422 2 points3 points4 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Apart-Cookie-8984 2 points3 points4 points 6 months ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]Flourescendrama[S] 0 points1 point2 points 6 months ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Apart-Cookie-8984 3 points4 points5 points 6 months ago* (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Flourescendrama[S] 2 points3 points4 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]AssistTemporary8422 2 points3 points4 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]ProperBoba 7 points8 points9 points 6 months ago (4 children) | Copy Link

[–]Flourescendrama[S] 6 points7 points8 points 6 months ago (3 children) | Copy Link

[–]ProperBoba 10 points11 points12 points 6 months ago (2 children) | Copy Link

[–]Flourescendrama[S] 1 point2 points3 points 6 months ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]ProperBoba 7 points8 points9 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Either_Bobcat_4106 9 points10 points11 points 6 months ago* (0 children) | Copy Link

Of course it's addictive. The content on the Internet is well produced and entertaining. It's also good to hear that you're not the problem. That you're just fine. That you don't need to change. It's those damn women. The content is purposely meant to stroke your ego. It's a great fantasy to have a female slave do your bidding.

What's more difficult to hear, for men and for women, for people of all political stripes, is that good communication and relationship-building involve learning and growth and awkward moments and setbacks and no guarantees of immediate success with the person that you want to be with. It's a long-term investment that involves continual self-examination and self-criticism, and constant self-correction. This takes work.

Red pill content is easy. Like a beer. Mmmm. I think I'll have another one. Rather than getting off the couch and...

[–]meleyys 5 points6 points7 points 6 months ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Either_Bobcat_4106 3 points4 points5 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Polish_Girlz 4 points5 points6 points 6 months ago (0 children) | Copy Link

[–]Soggy-Professor7025 -1 points0 points1 point 6 months ago (1 child) | Copy Link

[–]Flourescendrama[S] 0 points1 point2 points 6 months ago* (0 children) | Copy Link