Men's Lonliness isn't about not having a gf (for me, at least.)

cheezeter · 2026-02-18T11:44:20+00:00

Didn't you know that we are driven entirely by sex without other feelings or needs. It must be true because the feminazis say it is.

Normal_Cow1991 · 2026-02-18T13:07:53+00:00

I've been saying that for a while but explaining this to women I know feels like talking to a brick wall. This is coming from a guy who has a girlfriend.

Feminazis always half-ass their facts to get the upper hand; always saying that men are lonely because women don't need men anymore, and frankly I don't think men need women anymore as well; but they can't argue with that logic and would start calling you all these "social media" terms.

At 22 I have achieved some level of financial flexibility, I'm still a first year undergraduate and trust me, having that small financial edge can do wonders to a man. I'm in great physical condition and I am a fighter(MMA) but had to pause to focus on my education. By the book, my life looks great yeah?

Pausing the sport was my descision; but it also ruined me in somewhat manner; didn't know what else to do, Because that's what then-nineteen year old me knew. Mentally I was screwed up and I felt as if opening up felt like a recepie for disaster. I wasn't moody or depressed but none of the people I knew asked me how I was or how I felt; I was able to get out of that headspace once I decided to stop thinking about "what-ifs" and focusing on what I want to achieve other than that.

Once I was getting back on track people started telling me things like "See, you're fine" etc... and I understood that a majority of those people around me were just missing who I was before, because how can a person say "You're back" without knowing that I was in a bad headpace? I understood that it was always about my contributions, but not about me. So, yeah I'm fine being alone rather than staying with people who just craves that "social life" clicks like desperate animals.

63daddy · 2026-02-18T14:38:40+00:00

Absolutely noticed that.

There is clearly an agenda to equate being single with loneliness as a means to get men to date down and support women.

Some of the loneliest men I have known are married men in a bad marriage, that marriage getting in the way of them maintaining or developing friendships.

GobthraukGoonsgrinIX · 2026-02-18T14:58:56+00:00

"women are wonderful" effect is psychological and society is gynocentric. appeal to emotion favours women by design, they make or break the rules however they like. they set the social narrative, even if it's a total lie. your male friends are the only people you can lean on.

dmbrokaw · 2026-02-18T12:28:00+00:00

Careful, if you try to inject too much nuance into the conversation it will muddy the talking points on both sides, and that will make smooth brains feel bad.

ShabbyJerking · 2026-02-18T13:55:04+00:00

It's purposefully named that way to put the "problem causer" onto men themselves subtly. What it actually is in practice is just disrespect. It has little to nothing to do with loneliness itself.

AbysmalDescent · 2026-02-18T18:46:18+00:00

Systematic misandry, and it's normalization of hateful rhetoric against men as well as its lack of support for men, is a big factor in men's lowered overall mental health but most men are still "lonely" because they have some basic fundamental needs being unmet and which can only really be found in a meaningful relationship.

Sex is a part of being human. Love is a part of being human. Acceptance and support, both to give and receive, are a fundamental part of being human. The social issues that leave many men feeling unwanted and isolated are a part of the problem but they're not nearly as strongly felt as the kind of loneliness men experience without companionship.

World-Three · 2026-02-18T15:13:59+00:00

It is and it's not.

It's not because we obviously don't need a relationship to be ourselves. But it's not because some people genuinely feel and act as if that is what they need to function properly.

When guys you talk to disregard problems or their own well being because they're girl crazy, it does break potential bonds. You can lose friends when you are around men who throw everything away for a relationship. So despite it likely being a direct question, the idea that men are raised to find a woman to release their emotional frustration into, leaves men holding everything that man was and didn't value enough to maintain because he's pursuing that.

I lost plenty of friends over women. Probably the most compared to anything else. In that regard, male loneliness has a lot to do with that idea.

Melodic-Jaguar1660 · 2026-02-18T16:42:45+00:00

A common misconception is that loneliness is only caused by the absence of people and of course it can be but having people around who don't understand you is also a major cause of it. I think the whole "men are such simple creatures" thing is partly to blame, men aren't simple, men are complex and unfortunately a lot of women don't have the capacity, ability or patience to properly listen to, consider and empathise with men.

ChoiceDare7991 · 2026-02-18T13:22:33+00:00

Same. I think thanks to the whole incel scare that went on for years, it’s automatically assumed that any male issue is related grievance wise. “You just gotta meet someone” is not a good response to my grief over my circumcision, because those two things have nothing to do with each other!

New-Distribution6033 · 2026-02-18T18:44:57+00:00

When the MLE was just talked about here and other men's groups, it was about the lack of friends. It wasn't until mainstream media made it about dating that the MLE beame about that. It wasn't just single men, but married ones too. It is a lack of friends, not romantic partners.

Resident-Purpose-250 · 2026-02-18T11:44:53+00:00

yes, its more so our ig want for connection external to love and such. but in a way its so seems like an entrenched issue with society cause we did kind of set up the whole current social systems to view our expression issues and pain as effeminate

SlyPogona · 2026-02-18T14:08:11+00:00

Completely, ia about friendships and space for ourselves, places were we feel safe and comfortable, every space like that has been eroded or taken the ver by women who don't even care for it, look how they keep trying to.push women football and try to shame male fans for not making it big

Does_Not_Comply · 2026-02-18T14:12:58+00:00

I mean i wouldn't nessecrily complain about getting laid more but nah. I've been lonely even in a relationship with plenty of sex. It's more just knowing nobodies got your back other than yourself and that's just the way things are gonna be for awhile

Capital-Box164 · 2026-02-18T14:13:43+00:00

For me its about nto having much friends.

Andrew_27912car · 2026-02-18T14:29:32+00:00

Solitude is different to Loneliness, Very few Good Humans out there

SecondEldenLord · 2026-02-18T16:03:47+00:00

To me personally it is, cause getting friendships with men is pretty easy when you're younger. Admittedly it's harder when you're older cause everybody is getting married and all that.

Apart-Geologist2102 · 2026-02-18T20:32:41+00:00

Me I chose to be lonely no drama just peace and quiet

SidewaysGiraffe · 2026-02-18T15:22:28+00:00

I think there's certainly a connection, and that makes it part of a separate, but related, problem: for a LOT of men, their romantic partner is their primary, if not only social outlet. Lacking that leads to both more isolation and much stronger feelings of isolation, and having it leads to placing an oversized burden on the romantic partner you DO have.

You'll sometimes hear women complaining about all the socio-emotional support their boyfriend places on them, and saying "Male loneliness isn't my fault". While it's tempting to dismiss this as callousness, trying to see it from their viewpoint shows they're not really wrong- they're just feeling overwhelmed, and lashing out in response. I mean, they're not responsible for people starving in Ethiopia, either, but that doesn't stop them from donating to relief programs, does it?

I'm hardly an expert on relationships, but it seems to me that everyone involved would be helped if men were better at supporting each other. We may not be able to fix the issue on a macro scale, but improvement is improvement.

That is, however, only one step; ladies, if you're reading this, go give your man a big hug. You must; a random internet weirdo has commanded it.

Broad-Choice-5961 · 2026-02-19T04:21:04+00:00

Yes for sure

tmprlillsns · 2026-02-19T04:36:00+00:00

There used to be men's only groups, meetings, and organizations that used to help with this. But one day hyper individualism coupled with promotion of the false maculinity of the loan wolf those organizations disappeared. The death knell was when women decided that these "boys" clubs were sexist and now you will be lucky if 2-3 guys can get together without conflic or get calle slurs. We need to reestablish male groups. We need to support one another. Call up your bro. If no bros around find some or be the bro that you want others to be. Only when male social groups get a revival, we will continue yo loose young men to the black hole of loneliness. Bros we can do this.

mrmensplights · 2026-02-19T05:11:43+00:00

Never forget that the male loneliness epidemic was originally coined to refer to the loss of third spaces and social roles for men. We used to have social clubs and places for men who aren't married, men who are divorced, men who are widowed, young men not yet attached, for male teens and children, and - of course - also men in relationships and married. Men would engage with the community through these groups doing charitable acts and engaging in politics. Over the decades these groups have been systematically dismantled or fundamentally altered one after the other in the name of sexism.

Today with those spaces gone men are often viewed in terms of "marriage" and "work". Many men do not fit neatly into those categories and the actual "loneliness" - the isolation borne from the loss of social connection - is the inevitable downstream consequence. By losing these groups men have lost the ability to organize, to lobby for their best interests, and to engage society proactively. The result is that today men are viewed in utilitarian and sacrificial terms: The background actors in the lives of others.

It's hard to imagine now but there was a time when being male was venerated. It was celebrated for it's unique experience and point of view, rather than ridiculed and despised.

It was much later that some women got a whiff of 'male loneliness epidemic' and decided to just make it about themselves by making a bunch of social media posts attacking and rage-baiting men.

Darth-Hakujou · 2026-02-19T05:29:58+00:00

More female gas-lighting.

They WISH we men were lonely.

It's a deflection because women are the actual lonely and they don't have any real hobbies besides consumption of over-priced goods with no intrinsic or residual value.

Women are lonely ones because the hottest women lock down the rare 6/6/6 Chads they want who they will cheat on anyway with a loser.

Proof_Boysenberry_74 · 2026-02-19T08:17:48+00:00

Of course it isn't. I hate when people bring this up. The entire thing about the loneliness epidemic is that it's about all relationships to others, not just romantic.

AskTight7295 · 2026-02-19T19:47:18+00:00

I don’t believe it’s a real problem. It’s a psychological manipulation of men’s identity, an external hypnosis, a brainwash, a ruse. The real problem is men project their ideas of meaning onto women and society instead of creating meaning for themselves internally. Thus the actual problem is they have taken the bait and are now caught in the snare. No self awareness. Taking their self image and identity from a set of lies designed to create a type of discontent that is of no threat to the systems of control.

Hot_Reference_5515 · 2026-02-22T08:33:08+00:00

We need brotherhoods, like hunting parties in primitive times.

Repulsive_Milk877 · 2026-02-27T17:52:33+00:00

For me it deffinitely is big part of it. But you can still feel lonely even if you have gf. It's also about all the demonizing, shaming and complete lack of empathy. I would be able to accept being forever single, but the fact that our culture sees it as intimate failure worthy of ridicule makes it a lot more difficult.

Heisenburg7 · 2026-02-19T05:16:11+00:00

The Male Loneliness Crisis is due to a lack of meaningful male friendship.

oseday · 2026-02-19T00:59:45+00:00

I hate them. They neither know or care about what it's about. https://www.reddit.com/r/AskFeminists/comments/1r28s05/comment/o4vla4w/

roharareddit · 2026-02-19T03:27:38+00:00

There is no exclusively "male loneliness" epidemic.

Title	Men's Lonliness isn't about not having a gf (for me, at least.)
Author	No-Knowledge-8867
Upvotes	136
Comments	39
Date	February 18, 2026 11:37 AM UTC (5 months ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/MensRights
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/MensRights/comments/1r80odh/mens_lonliness_isnt_about_not_having_a_gf_for_me/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/MensRights/mens-lonliness-isnt-about-not-having-a-gf-for-me.1573739 https://theredarchive.com/post/1573739

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