Method for creating and tracking goals

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May 1, 2018

I've taken a lot of inspiration from this group, particularly the self improvement stuff and becoming the man I admire. Fast question, what is your preferred method for goal tracking. I have a wide range of goals from physical fitness, to career things, sex stuff and etc. On top of that some are shorter term and others long term (e.g. ultimate career goals in about 10 yrs).

I started making an excel for this but it quickly gets messy when you try to combine weeks with years. Also, some goals don't really make sense in a "goal / milestone" context. E.g. I can make a goal for anal sex, but it won't be very helpful, reliable or accurate when it eventually does happen since this isn't something that I have a clear roadmap to. But I don't want to leave it out since it is an eventual goal.

Generally speaking, how do you work with these things in your MAP? Thanks in advance.

Post Information
Title Method for creating and tracking goals
Author electric_dragon1
Upvotes 9
Comments 32
Date 01 May 2018 01:26 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit askMRP
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[–]MrChad_ThundercockChief Autist in Charge12 points13 points  (5 children) | Copy

I’ve come to learn it’s not whether or not you achieve the goal, it’s the person you become during the process.

[–]2ndalRed Beret2 points3 points  (3 children) | Copy

This is the gayest thing you've said here. I like it.

[–]simbarlionRed Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Yes. It's what you say when you didn't make it.

Like being alpha on the inside.

[–]MrChad_ThundercockChief Autist in Charge0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

That was pretty gay..huh.

I’m going on 4 years mrp this summer, it’s amazing to see that most dad bods out there aren’t even trying.. I’d say like 3% even try. Most live in their pathetic little beta lives oblivous to the matrix.

So when I say about not reaching your goals it’s okay, I’m talking about that most faggots don’t even have goals. Their goals are coming home from work, drinking beer, playing ps4 or fantasy football, jerking off to porn and going to bed.

[–]thunderbeyond1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

97% of men are fat fucking pathetic losers???

You're goddamn right.

OP it's important to not compare yourself against them. You will find that with even a modest amount of effort you are in the top 25% of men.

Don't give a modest amount of effort though. Give all you've got. You only get one life and as ChadTC says, the other path is to be a fat fucking pathetic loser.

That was pretty gay..huh.

Faggot. (Could not resist)

[–]SteelSharpensSteelMod / Red Beret0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

In bed.

[–]abdadaRed Beret4 points5 points  (6 children) | Copy

Better to make contingency plans than goals. A man who wins is a man with many options, not singular goals.

If you set strict goals, it means you GAF, and it'll set you up for heartbreak.

The worst goal to set is one that other people are aware of. Never share your goals or tell others what you're up to.

[–]Reject4440 points1 point  (5 children) | Copy

This would apply more to relationships and sex goals, right? Instead of "Goal: Get anal sex from my wife," the plan should be "What will I do if I don't get anal sex from my wife by [Date]"--correct? For measurable stuff that I control, like my lift numbers, BF%, income, having specific goals and working toward ONLY that goal (and not tolerating any "Plan B") is really helpful in keeping me motivated working toward that goal.

[–]abdadaRed Beret1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

It applies to all relationships and all goals. A man is "outcome independent" which means he's not laser focused on just one goal but many contingencies.

It's not about demanding your way, it's about having options if things don't go just the Plan A way. You don't GAF because you have options, in every relationship, for where you spend your time and energy.

[–]Reject4440 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

But I think we SHOULD GAF about things that are entirely in our control, like lifting a certain number of times a week or gaming the wife a certain way. It’s stuff outside of our control that we should be OI about and NGAF because we can’t control them, so we keep options open—stuff like having sex with our wives a certain number of times (because while we control when we initiate, we can’t control how she responds). Setting my own specific goal to go to the gym 4 times per week and lift x-number of reps each time at escalating weights is entirely my responsibility and I don’t need contingency plans or options for that because it’s all up to me. So I do GAF that I follow that goal (and don’t allow myself contingencies) because that’s how I force myself to progress.

[–]abdadaRed Beret1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

I always plan my lifts but I have options and contingencies for that. That way, any one of my plans for day happen, my progress is furthered, no harm, no foul. The guy with no options for a positive gym day or a positive reaction from gaming the wife is the guy who will sulk and join the cult of "anxiety and depression" folks.

Being outcome dependent on anything is not a good position. Having options means not being tied to one result.

[–]electric_dragon1[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

Instead of "Goal: Get anal sex from my wife," the plan should be "What will I do if I don't get anal sex from my wife by [Date]"--correct?

I hear where you're coming from on this but now we're just switching out a goal for a covert contract (covert expiration date on patience and choice to go with a plan B). I'm not sure how to reconcile this without going into some monk mentality where it doesn't matter. But for me, it certainly does matter and I admit I'm not OI about it.

[–]Reject4440 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I don't see this as a covert contract, because I'm not doing X activity believing that my wife will react in Y way as a result. I'm simply making plans for my life, which will either include anal sex with my wife by whatever date I have set in the plan, OR whatever I have declared as my option(s) as "Plan B" if my wife is not receptive to anal sex by that date. I;'m being OI because I'm not butthurt or lost if she doesn't give me what I want; instead, I know exactly what other action I'm going to take (whether my plan is for divorce, plates, or something else) because I know that I can't control her behavior, and that she will be the one missing out on that part of sharing in my awesomeness if she doesn't want to participate. It's the same as getting rejected when initiating and then going to the gym instead.

[–]The_LitzRed Beret2 points3 points  (0 children) | Copy

Whatever app, Moleskin journal or whiteboard you use, always remember it is second to Acta non Verba. Don't get tangled up in minute details.

[–]wekacuck1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

I like using habit tracking apps and the simplicity of the don't-break-the-chain type things. The one I use now is "Loop Habit Tracker" (github, play store) because it's simple enough to do what it does and easy enough to see at a glance how things are going. And basically when there's a new habit I want to develop I add it to the list and set a notification schedule to "nag" me until it becomes more automatic so I don't forget. Even after I don't need to be reminded any more the don't-break-the-chain motivates me.

Also, some goals don't really make sense in a "goal / milestone" context. E.g. I can make a goal for anal sex, but it won't be very helpful, reliable or accurate when it eventually does happen since this isn't something that I have a clear roadmap to.

The risk there is that you're reinforcing some sort of covert contract. I don't like tracking things that are outside my control and have a fairly sharp razor for that. I only track what's under my control and things that I'm making an effort to improve (or monitoring to avoiding regressing on). I see it more as a tool focused on my behavior and not an almanac to track the weather or some woman's cervical mucus viscosity or whatever. So for example I track "didn't avoid initiating" which focuses on my behavior and not the outcome.

[–]electric_dragon1[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

It's a good app, thanks for the recommendation. I think it's good for habits but I wish there was a similar app that allowed for goal setting with milestones. It's possible to hijack other tools for this like Todoist I guess. For your "didn't avoid initiating" habit, do you use the same app for this? Because unless you initiate every day the data will look inconsistent.

[–]wekacuck0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Personally I would just go straight to r\quantifiedself for that sort of thing. There's a bit of a learning curve but that's what things like Nomie excel at.

For your "didn't avoid initiating" habit, do you use the same app for this? Because unless you initiate every day the data will look inconsistent.

Yes I use the same app. Wording habits very carefully so that you don't break the chain for undesired reasons is important. The "didn't avoid" evolved there for me because it refers to specific problematic reasons I did not initiate and not to others (to me it's referring to when I'm prejudging the outcome or trying to punish or being butthurt or whatever). If it's impossible to initiate for a "valid" reason that's not avoiding it. Anyway I know what the checkmark means to me and that's all that matters.

[–]markpf731 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Weight lifting - app to track my workout and weights (warmup calculator).

MAP - put pen to paper in a journal and keep it somewhere safe. Every time you feel apathetic or lost revisit your MAP and take care of the low hanging fruit to keep you marching forward.

What you're really asking is how do I hold myself accountable. You can do it publicly with weekly OYS posts. Here you'll get feedback on your blind spots.

[–]hbPUA1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

Two ways:

weekly review: Where i ask myself three or more basic questions.

  • What went well this week?

  • How could I improve _____?

  • What is my ONE thing in health, business, game I could improve, such by doing it everything gets easier or unneccesary?

Set systems instead of goals

Example goal, benchpress 1.5 * my body weight by june 30th.

Example system, I go to the gym four times a week, and dedicate two days to bench pressing and overhead presses. Following a proven lifting program that proggressivly add more weigth and others have used with success.

[–]wild_deer_man1 point2 points  (0 children) | Copy

There is a simple method I came up with from reading some books: you make a list of big goals and a reasonable timeframe. Then, you break them down into actions and at the beginning of every week you write about 3 simple, doable, goals that will further you as much as possible.

The hard part is to filter the noise and find what is THE most important thing that will advanve you the most.

Keep the goals SIMPLE, so that by the end of the week you will feel that you have accomplished what you set out to do, and not disappoint yourself by taking more than you can actually handle.

I would say that this is a balance between ambitious long term goals and braking then down into simple steps. So for example "trying anal" may be a step in "make my sex life more fulfilling". You can even make small steps like finger her, get a small butplug, or any other creative idea you might think of.

[–]pseu-don-ymous1 point2 points  (2 children) | Copy

I use Google Sheets, but with a different spreadsheet for different types of goals/tracking. Trying to combine everything into a single spreadsheet would be chaos. I have one for tracking my lifting (which makes it easy to measure my progress against identified goals), others for tracking "to do" list items to help me own my shit in different areas of life, another for career goals/planning, etc.

Works for me because each new spreadsheet is as simple or complex as I want to make it, and doing it on Google means they are all readily accessible on any computer or my phone. I've tried various apps, paper systems, etc—this is what works for me.

[–]electric_dragon1[S] 0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

I like the approach. Do you do anything fancy for your spreadsheet template?

[–]pseu-don-ymous0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Nope, not really. Generally start with a blank spreadsheet and build it out over time to meet whatever the objectives are for the goals it tracks.

My lifting spreadsheet is my most complex by far, with about a dozen tabs, pivot tables, charts, etc—but it's arrived there over the course of a couple years. One tab is for tracking my current 1RM against my short- and long-term goals for each lift (and bodyweight ratio goals for each). Another tab tracks my 1RM history for each, so I can see how I've progressed. Another tracks my EMOM workouts (one set every minute on the minute), so I can track progress (number of successful sets) at a given weight—once I can do 30 minutes, I add weight and start again.

I use a separate spreadsheet for calculating and tracking my 5/3/1 lifting, which I usually go back to for a few cycles every 6 months or so.

Some of the others are very basic—essentially just text lists, with columns for whatever dates/data/notes/etc are relevant to the goals they track.

[–]johneyapocalypse0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I'm writing the equivalent of war and peace on the subject and will be posting to main sub in the coming days. I think you'll find it helpful.

[–]SBIIIRed Fucking Commando0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Some form of ink that goes on paper.

[–]2ndalRed Beret0 points1 point  (1 child) | Copy

If you have so many detailed goals that you can't think of a coherent way to organize them, that tells me you're not setting the right kind of goals.

I'm a fan of SMART goals: Specific, Measurable, Ambitious (yet Attainable), Relevant and Timely.

No single person an multitrack successfully beyond a certain point. Set core SMART goals for the key areas of your life and resist trying to measure every god damn thing.

[–]electric_dragon1[S] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Typically I tend to set many goals but I do this with a prioritization. The goals that are more fundamental and have benefits which trickle down to many areas of life are given the highest priority, e.g. lifting and physical fitness. Then there are more minor goals on the other end of the spectrum which may or may not fall off the radar and are much less consequential (make the bed everyday). But ultimately I still would like to track them all.

[–]creating_my_life0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I can make a goal for anal sex

Never make another person's actions your goal.

[–]SgtSilverBack0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Remember one of the main points to being introspective about your goals and steps is to help focus your mind on the steps to reach that goal not just to remind you to do those steps.

They can be as broad or narrow as you need but at some point, narrow becomes an actual design. That is hard to maintain against many detailed goals.

[–]Cloudsurf890 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Get yourself a cucumber and a tub of vaseline next time you're at the shops - big tick for anal for you this weekend 😆👍

[–]gvntr0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

Write your Iron Goal down every day on a piece of paper.

[–][deleted] 0 points1 point  (0 children) | Copy

I use a spreadsheet and a word document. The word document I call my handbook to success. It has a short paragraph about self discipline and then 8 subjects for success in no specific order. Body/Appearance, Finances, Profession, Marriage, Education, Social/Personal and Character. It has a few sentences or bullet points.

The spreadsheet I call my habits/goal tracker. There’s two sheets. The first one is things I’m focusing on right now. For instance stronglifts is on there, college is and a reminder for my wife’s birthday. There’s a few more other things. They can range from goals or habits. Goals for things I want to do. Habits for lifestyle choices I want to form.

The second sheet of that excel is called my parking lot ideas. It’s got goals and habits as well. Whenever I think about doing something that will take some time I put it down. For instance I have reduce my wardrobe, develop a list of network outing events and friends, and some personal things I want to accomplish like teaching myself physics and trigonometry.

I review these 3 times a week minimum.

You can kill a man, but you can't kill an idea.

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