What does it mean when she says she wishes I would cheat, so it would take the pressure off of her? Background: I unplugged a year ago. Since then, I have done a huge turnaroud. Lost 20+ lbs, lifting and looking good. Confidence is way up, I feel great physically and my emotional equilibrium and peace of mind are back, new duds, new haircut, lots of IOI from good looking chicks.
Wife: I have been laying on the mostly passive dread for months. Wife has noticed these changes, has mentioned obliquely and half jokingly about them, but she has not responded beyond that. No possessiveness, no mate guarding, not much of anything. The other night, I had to intervene when her anger at my daughter was on the verge of getting out of control. She had already screamed at her, calling her "a bitch! "for no good reason really. I kept it from escalating by quietly telling wife to cool it, and reminding her that she is the adult. Well, she has been in a foul mood since. Has been sending me shit tests in volleys. How dare I rebuke her/ correct her?? I have passed them, if not aced them. She rocked my frame a couple of times, but I never lost my cool, and did not let the "discussions" last longer than 15 minutes. Responded with detachment, A & A, and AM. Well, at the end of one of the last shit tests, she lays that line on me. Says that while my body looks great, my personality sucks, and she wishes I would cheat to take the pressure off. Thats a long way from her accusing me of beiig a cheat, as I have seen so often elsewhere. After one year of steadily increasing dread, with me in the best shape of my life, and her 50 - 70 lbs overweight, unkempt etc. This is not what I was expecting. Yes, I am as morally certain as I can be that she is not cheating. ( And, she tells me "well, I am not going to church with the rest of you anymore, because I can't stand YOUR defintion of what it means for a man to be a head of the house"etc etc. Talk about cutting off your nose...I guess I was supposed to act horrified and beg her to come. I just shrugged and said "Do whatever you want." We all got up and went to church without her the next day.)