35 years old. Married 7 years. Two kids. Wife had affair in 2017. Things had been stressful for a while. I was wrapped up in a new promotion at work, wife had been struggling as her mom had cancer. Anyhow, she ended up fucking around with some guy who started out as a shoulder to cry on as I was not as ‘emotionally available’ as she needed. By the time I’d obtained enough proof to be sure what was happening it had been going on a few months. I know the advice here is to not confront until you’re under control. I discovered email evidence on computer minutes before wife came home so I was unprepared and just blurted out accusation. She admitted and told everything, even stuff I’d rather not have heard. Crushed. Spent more than a year trying to ‘work it out’. Relationship is actually good and peaceful today. Sex not as often as I want, but better than some I’ve seen. Avg about 2x per week. She has went to great lengths to convince me to let it go. I feel maybe like I am close to the point where I could do that. I spent 2018 learning how to meet her emotional needs. She’s happy. Lately, I been focusing on reducing my need for external validation. Lifting also, but it’s never been an issue for me to be in shape. Anyhow wife’s words and actions(the ones I can see) now suggest she’s in this marriage. I am just wondering if there are examples out there where a man can go through this with the wife, recognize his failings, improve, and then still have a good marriage with the same woman. I’d love to hear from someone who came back from this and managed to have satisfying marriage. Or, if you tried that path and it didn’t work let’s hear about that too. Just looking to benefit from the experiences of others. Thanks.