Q4 People in relationships in this sub, how do you feel your interests in gender relations affects your relationship?

DebatePony · 2019-02-05T22:40:56+00:00

My husband and I like to talk about how everyone is stupid (at relationships) but us. It's a fun bonding experience.

Young_Oryx · 2019-02-06T03:34:04+00:00

Whenever I bring up PPD, my husband rolls his eyes and tells me I'm only encouraging the misogynists on the internet by engaging with them.

Littleknownfacts · 2019-02-05T22:55:59+00:00

He asks me what's happening on Reddit. I tell him. He laughs and makes me a cocktail.

poppy_blu · 2019-02-06T01:09:20+00:00

I’m not interested in gender relations per se, it’s just fun to fuck with people who take themselves too seriously. I’ve done this on redfem sites, right wing sites, alt right sites. Husband gets a good laugh out of some of the choice posts I share with him but won’t hesitate to tell me when he wants me to get the fuck off reddit and make him a sammich.

yasee · 2019-02-06T02:17:06+00:00

it has at times made me a bit neurotic. less so now

lefactorybebe · 2019-02-05T23:27:26+00:00

It kinda doesn't. I'll tell him some particularly crazy stuff I read on here, he laughs, and that's about it.

rpsheepdog · 2019-02-05T22:42:35+00:00

Kind of a vague question

My wife and I are interested in having sex, raising kids, and going on trips together.

Our gender relations/roles are pretty conservative, if you mean in the broader sense among the national dialogue, they don't affect us much at all.

i_have_a_semicolon · 2019-02-05T23:28:53+00:00

It has helped me significantly since I found this 6 years ago. It helped me figure out my shit so that I wouldn't drive away my man. It made me seek more resources on what it really takes to have a long term healthy and happy relationship. It's made me grateful for the things we are and are not. At times, when I over do it, it can lead to insecurities or "weird" thinking. Then I pull back and things normalize. One example of weird thinking is for instance looking down on my fiance for apologizing to me for something just because Reddit says that's beta. One I know it's beta, and two, I'd prefer him to apologise than be a stoic asshole. So I sort of rewind that process and remind myself that the observations trps have are not the ultimate truth and one can be sorry without being subservient. And when I think about it that way I realize how silly I've been.

LeaneGenova · 2019-02-06T00:54:14+00:00

Mostly it's stupid jokes that come from this stuff. He went to Abu Dhabi for work last week and when I refused to go he gave me a lot of "strong independent woman in great need of some male dominated culture" flak of the joke variety and took our son instead.

I did ask about (what to me is) weirdness around marrying a younger woman as we got married when I was 22 and he was 29. I was curious to see if he was on board with n-count paranoia and looks worship. Tl;dr version: I got a no on the former, somewhat yes to the latter, and his side of the reality of that situation which was interesting to me. But mostly it's just jokes that come of gender relations.

RedPill-BlackLotus · 2019-02-06T17:24:55+00:00

It saved my marriage. No one tells men the rules, we keep doing the same wrong bullshit that females have been telling us for years. Now dealing with my wife is like playing tic, tac, toe with a chicken and now, shes the chicken.

I have never seen her so happy.

WestsideMoonWalker · 2019-02-05T22:49:25+00:00

It made me realize the importance of actually listening to my own role models, considering my parents have been married 30+ years and grandparents were married for damn near 70.

coratoad · 2019-02-06T04:30:25+00:00

It made it worse and I wish I never heard of RP

[deleted] · 2019-02-06T09:23:40+00:00

The only way it affects me IRL is unlike most men I understand the inherent risks of marriage and don't wanna do it.

Otherwise, having this interest and posting here has no effect on my relationship, except for making jokes about it sometimes.

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[deleted] · 2019-02-05T23:17:19+00:00

It's made it somewhat easier to discuss things, as I have topics to raise. For example, talking about fears I might have in the future. I have plenty of examples to think of and can adapt them for myself.

I think it makes me more patient in listening to gossip as well, cos I have a red pill/blue pill frame to hold it against. My partner is Asian so it's doubly interesting as I'm hearing about a different culture.

SmurfESmurferson · 2019-02-05T23:24:19+00:00

I'm wildly, wildly female-brained. He's incredibly male-brained

Gender stuff just happens in our relationship, with no real forethought or intention. Hell, I've had a conversation with at least one RP guy here who was surprised to learn that I have a more RP marriage than he does

[deleted] · 2019-02-06T00:22:11+00:00

I try not to bring it up so much but in today’s political climate the bait is too tempting. I usually strip back the wording a lot and focus on “its biology, just makes sense” or “think about what cavemen did” when talking red pill truths.

Am horrified that someone will find out that I post here so really try to strip a lot of the language out

decoy88 · 2019-02-06T00:44:25+00:00

My values and requirements were clearly formed way before I ever found a Reddit. And have not changed since. So nah. No affect

PPD does occasionally provide topics of discussion though

pngmafia97 · 2019-02-06T04:04:53+00:00

Discussing gender relations is an extremely fulfilling part of our relationship.

We're both very curious people and can debate and discuss for hours. Gender relations is a particularly interesting one for the both of us, because we both have relatively high ncount for each gender. I spun plates for a few years, and he was basically a Tinder addict for a while. Understanding each gender's experience, particularly given the dynamics of physical attractiveness, money, status, ethnicity, etc. makes for a seriously fascinating anthropological and sociological investigation.

Our interest in gender relations has also shaped our relationship "rules." We've done the open relationship route and participated in group sex. My ex held his opinions on gender relations pretty staunchly which made such untraditional relationship schematics a total failure, but with my current partner, we are much more communicative and empathetic regarding our desires and needs.

Pastelitomaracucho · 2019-02-06T05:10:25+00:00

They don't.

Gravel_Roads · 2019-02-06T08:48:31+00:00

It's mostly just an interesting topic of discussion. Gender (in terms of how humans treat each other) is a mostly social construct, and we're both well-traveled people, so we get a lot of mileage out of "compare and contrast" dialogues.

This sub provides a lot of interesting fodder partly because I'd never even known so many people were even struggling, and some of the weirder assumptions (especially about Evul woMyns) are always good for a few laughs or a deep-dig into how people end up in such remote mental spaces that such odd thinking could thrive.

darudeboysandstorm · 2019-02-06T14:02:12+00:00

It didn't affect my last relationship because my ex-GF was the most standard normie ever and didn't care at all about gender relations. My current one does though (and unfortunately is a feminist), so we occasionally discuss some topics and agree to disagree in a most of them as neither accepts the other's point of view. She doesn't know about this sub tho

GradualDecomp · 2019-02-06T17:34:26+00:00

Not at all. As for the rest of my relationships, none of the "rules" screeched about here apply.

I come here to enjoy the delusion.

we-are-men-with-ven · 2019-02-06T22:47:43+00:00

We're both a bit hippy dippy. It doesn't really effect things much. He finds the terp responses ridiculous and is very much into femminism.

He believes in the whole white knight thing (this was before I joined the sub) and him and our friend made a joke about a women in trouble and how the caveman must go to the rescue.

It was him who enlightened me about nagging (men just say 'yes' when they mean 'I don't actually want to'.

Genuinely he thinks I'm weird for spending so much time arguing with strangers and looks forward to my semester starting lol.

We both went on a thread about SMV

eyewant · 2019-02-07T01:03:59+00:00

Knowing gender relations helped harden my heart for the disappointments that came.

hshsvdhsiabs · 2019-02-08T02:05:25+00:00

I think it’s helped me realize how lucky I am. If the shit you guys say is true about most people (which I’m not convinced it all is) , then dating would be very risky and scary. But I was lucky to find my man in high school. We are still young, I can’t confidently say that I 100% know we will get married in the future or anything, though that would make me very happy. But I’ve at the very least, I’ve experienced what I believe is real love. Without worrying about hypergamy or any of that. And had I not read all your experiences, perhaps I would think what I found was how it always is. And the thought of me taking this for granted makes me very sad, so I’m glad I know all of this.

Title	Q4 People in relationships in this sub, how do you feel your interests in gender relations affects your relationship?
Author	thrownaway2thewind
Upvotes	8
Comments	65
Date	February 5, 2019 10:28 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/anjkx8/q4_people_in_relationships_in_this_sub_how_do_you/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4-people-in-relationships-in-this-sub-how-do-you.257419 https://theredarchive.com/post/257419

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