Q4W Experiences w/ men bringing “porn sex” into the bedroom?

SpaceWhiskey · 2018-06-23T20:41:17+00:00

I haven’t been on the market in a while, but when I was I would definitely encounter guys who would try porn moves. It was mostly funny, like one guy was having sex with me almost sideways, as if to allow a camera operator a shot at the area of penetration. He just thought that’s what you were supposed to do, but it felt... weird. Not really like sex at all, more like a medical exam. I didn’t want to embarrass him but I had to say something eventually, it wasn’t doing anything for me. Another guy, after sex, started like, patting the outside of my vagina, soft little pats, and he was looking at me expectantly for a reaction. I was like dude what are you doing and he said it’s how this lesbian porn he likes ends and the one girl goes crazy when the other girl pats her vagina. I mean, it was sweet, he thought I’d be super into it, I told him it wasn’t my thing in a nice way, maybe other women like it but I kinda don’t think it’s a real thing outside porn.

The biggest porn tell is choking, for sure. I have been known to be into it sometimes, but I think it’s a little unnerving how many guys will go right into choke sex without asking first, it’s playing with fire.

Freethetreees · 2018-06-23T16:55:03+00:00

My ex boyfriend tried to do "the claw" on me lol which is basically forcing two fingers in my mouth and separating them and curling them in a really awkward way. I felt like I was at the dentist and I was immediately turned off. I am certain he saw this shit in a porn.

Jammerly1 · 2018-06-23T08:19:59+00:00

I don't really have much experience (PIV n=1), but I think generally porn sex is putting demands on women that didn't exist before. Certainly this is a problem in teenagers where they are expected to do anal/cumshots/deepthroat because teenage boys are getting most of their sex ed from porn

CatchPhraze · 2018-06-24T03:46:46+00:00

Porn totally ruins men in excess, just like any other addiction. They can have "Death Grip" or only be able to cum while watching it. Lack of actual sexual enthusiasm, (Porn shows men getting instant gratification, there is rarely flirting and foreplay so lots of young men are put off by the expectation of that effort so instead of 45 minutes of foreplay with their girlfriend, they can just go jerk off in like 15) Unrealistic body expectations like having bronzer and concealer on a woman's vagina, bleached orifices, hair extensions and professional make up every time sex is going to happen. Degrading "shock value" sexual acts are normal and don't need to be talked about before hand. Teaching bad sex, like men just shoving it in her and "pounding" and expecting her to orgasm from that.

Porn is like trying to learn how to go to high-school from watching Hollywood teen movies where their all secretly 21, have a car, and know someone with a multi million dollar mansion whose throwing a raging house party. You're actual experience is going to fall short, or at lease be drastically different.

So is porn bad? In excess yeah, for men it's self sabotaging. Every once in a while if your girlfriend isn't around or you're single and having some major sexual frustration it can be fine, even healthy. When it becomes a replacement or crutch though is when it gets dangerous.

Ethically, now that we have google, and the internet, I suggest finding a few porn stars you like, making sure they are doing it for the right reasons, and start following their careers. That way you know the people in the porn are consenting and less likely to being exploitative. Also, paying for porn isn't a bad idea if your supporting a company that has a good track record with respecting its employees and the rights of its workers. It's when you just mindless browse porn databases you end up consuming media that was exploitative of woman. Being a smart consumer in regards to the morals of porn is as easy as picking other fair trade goods.

waxedmintfloss · 2018-06-24T08:51:45+00:00

Yes. Having had sex with men ranging from 18 to 60, there has been a trend that the older ones like lots of foreplay, kissing, sweet talk, eating pussy... Younger ones like more suggestive foreplay while your clothes are still on but then want you to be ready for penetration, like multiple positions, novel positions, dirty talk, cumming on different parts of your body, and discussing or watching porn together. Most of them pull out to cum somewhere else.

Offhisgame · 2018-06-23T11:13:18+00:00

[deleted]

quotient_is · 2018-06-23T13:38:25+00:00

I think "porn sex" has made my sex life more adventurous and fun. Admittedly, I grew up with the internet and have also watched it for a good chunk of my life.

A couple of men I've been with have taken too literally. For instance, I've had to explain on more than one occasion that rubbing my clit as hard and fast as possible will A) hurt and B) not make me orgasm in any way shape or form.

It's fine as long as I let them know what actually feels good, and I've never gotten a negative reaction to my feedback. IME, most men are happy to hear what works and what doesn't. Aside from one guy with a foot fetish that I really wasn't into, it's all been good.

I'd rather be surprised by whatever new thing husband or I might want to try than do the same thing for the rest of our lives.

Entropy-7 · 2018-06-23T12:17:29+00:00

[deleted]

azngirl7689 · 2018-06-24T03:56:05+00:00

Well, I had to point out to my BF a couple times that I don’t bend that way and that he needs to use lube and do some foreplay if he wants to do butt stuff. But other than that, (thankfully), no experience with porn sex.

ffapod · 2018-06-23T10:15:03+00:00

It's just another sign that many women don't like sex at all.

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Entropy-7 · 2018-06-23T10:15:54+00:00

Pgiven that only one in 10 of the women I have been with were really worth it, eitheis great but Sturgeon's Law is in effect. I suppose that applies in real life as well

Title	Q4W Experiences w/ men bringing “porn sex” into the bedroom?
Author	WhiskeyOnASunday93
Upvotes	4
Comments	101
Date	June 23, 2018 7:38 AM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/8t8f3e/q4w_experiences_w_men_bringing_porn_sex_into_the/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/q4w-experiences-w-men-bringing-porn-sex-into-the.261808 https://theredarchive.com/post/261808

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