I feel dumb even asking something so basic
Last couple weeks I had been getting a lot done around the house. Not because of any covert contract or dancing monkey. I've just established routines and trying to build good habits. Been leading the kids in healthy habits. Doing exercises and tracking their progress etc. we've made it into a game. It's fun and I don't push them.
Today I was just off. Work was a hard day. I just need to catch up on some sleep really. So I didn't get anything done around the house. Left dishes etc. Wife works weekends and one day through the week. This happened to be her work day. On the days she works she acts like I didn't work that day and I should have been cleaning the house all day or something. She always comes home very entitled. Even said one time she expects a clean house when she comes home from work.
Even though I felt bad I decided to prioritize the kids over cleaning. I ran with the kids. Had them do their other exercises. Played chess with the two boys.
She gets home and the questions start "did you do this?" "What about that?" I just say no and STFU not because I'm trying to STFU but because I'm just too tired to engage. Her mom cooked dinner so she says "well at least mom cooked dinner." Questions continue "did you do this?" I Say no that I'm feeling bad today.
This interaction solidifies the idea that AWALT and they don't care who you are but what you provide for them. This was one of my off days. A day where I wasn't being attractive. Do I get a break? Of course not. Should I expect one? No.
I'm putting the kids to bed now and afterwards I'll be leaving to the man cave. I'm not interested in guilt trips and creating distance is my only appropriate response at this point.
My question is, should I be like "I didn't own my shit today. Being tired isn't an excuse. I need to man up." Or should I do whatever the fuck I want. I felt bad so I gave myself an evening off and I don't feel bad about it.
Im sure in the future I'll have off days. Do I just need to suck it up and own my shit?
I mean, it would be nice to have a woman who actually gave a fuck about me and instead of giving me a hard time asked me how I was doing, if she could get me anything, hope you feel better etc. but that's not the sort of world we live in is it? That's the blue pill ideal. If I want someone to care about me like that I need to develop my male friends for that. As a leader/man of this ship I don't get off days.