Blue pill idiot here. Married 19 years, 3 kids, just joined the gym last month and going through MRP sidebar. Finished NMMNG, currently on WISNIFG. I'm looking for some guidance from you guys. I can't believe I'm just learning about RP/MRP and wish I had learned a long time ago. I'm your textbook example of what not to do and I'm just starting to unfuck myself. To make a long story short, I've let my wife control my decision making for the family. She like to argue and yell, I don't and I was never raised that way. I avoid confrontation to the point of agreeing with her in order to avoid a fight, but we all know how that turns out. She comes from a dysfunctional family where she doesn't talk to her sisters, and her mom (my mother in law) was a single mom. I should have seen the red flags. Wife is a total SJW, feminist, and found out I was looking at RP videos and listening to "offensive" ideas that are brainwashing me. In a way, I'm glad she learned, I was tired of hiding my path to figuring out why I've been struggling. Her M.O. is also the same in her professional and personal life, if you piss her off, she cuts you out of her life. Anyway, after years of slowly giving in to my wife's attitude, I'm starting to implement some of the MRP theories.
On NYE, I was getting some work done on the computer and I hear my wife yelling and screaming at the kids (it happens more often than not). I had to finish my project and when I was done went out to ask what happened. It turns out it all started because my wife asked the kids to wash the dishes and they started arguing about who had done what. Next thing you know she starts screaming at them and tells my oldest to clean the bathrooms. I figured here is my chance to speak up and start implementing some of the things I've learned and let her know the screaming is not an acceptable reaction to the kids. I agreed they needed to help but then she started escalating, and getting mad. Next thing you -know she starts going off on me, this time I didn't back down, but it ruined the rest of NYE at my neighbors house. If her eyes could kill, I'd be dead. I'm glad I let her know how i felt, even if she got pissed.
I've laid low, doing chores around the house, making brkfst, putting away all the holiday decorations, etc. this morning I get a long txt about telling me I was wrong. (don't know how to link images for you to read) here are some highlights - I should have supported her & talked to the kids - I took my aggression out on her - Was "rude, disrespectful, aggressive, self absorbed and insensitive" like watching an ape pound his chest saying "i'm master of this jungle look at me in all my glory", it was uncalled for and pathetic. - "You don't have your wife's respect because you behave like an effeminate man" You're so self absorbed in your music, your Youtube channels, your video games, etc. you need to pray. so that God can help you understand that your principle responsibility is to protect your children and wife over all things. Every waking hour is there for you to sacrifice yourself for the well being of your family".
There's more but I'm looking for any thoughts or suggestions. I work my ass off to help provide for my family, picking up any OT I can get my hands on, she also works full time; Old beta wants to apologize and say sorry, but I'm ready to call her out on her bullshit and do something fun with my kids/hit the gym instead of putting up with BS. Thanks in advance for this community.