" The Tinderverse is a horrible analog for reality. "

Mafiale · 2020-02-25T12:10:37+00:00

It’s good way to red pill men that’s for sure

churnthrowaway123456 · 2020-02-25T11:59:20+00:00

Tinder is 65-70% men. That right there makes it a terrible analog for real life.

Henk7839 · 2020-02-25T11:31:53+00:00

Online dating is the most popular way of relationships being formed in this day and age. It simply is reality.

Eastuss · 2020-02-25T11:36:58+00:00

Yes this is the semptiternal argument

RP: "look at the dating apps, it's a worse version of reality"
BP: "this isn't reality, only the cesspool of people go there and it doesn't happen like that in IRL"

Can't do anything after that point.

akaean · 2020-02-25T13:51:02+00:00

Tinder sucks and it is definitely not the best analog for reality. If I had to pick an analog for online dating to map to reality, it would be something like Match or OKC, or at least how those used to be. In general, Match and OKC allowed users to create a profile which added depth to their online presence and allowed a bit more of their personality to flow through in addition to their pictures alone.

The issue with Tinder is it is 100% looks. You like what you see? swipe right. You don't like what you see? swipe left. You've got 1 or 2 sentences tops for exposition, you have to tell your entire story visually through pictures, and you don't get an opportunity to converse unless you have paired with a match.

Other OLD platforms offer a far greater degree of flexibility. You can fill out a section on your interests and hobbies. A self summary, music you like. You can read about the other person- and read their writing style which can tell a surprising amount of a person- even if we don't realize it. You can pick up on red flags you wouldn't otherwise have noticed, and of course, you can still browse through pictures. Finally, you can actually send messages, and while most messages sent don't get a response for men, there are also plenty of moments where a good first message does connect and get a response and start a conversation.

I've had very little luck on Tinder, but I've had a lot of luck on OKC. One of my close buddies who is a very good looking guy has hooked up with a single girl from Tinder, and didn't have anything go anywhere for over a year after that. He is currently engaged and very happy.

The reason Tinder is bad, is because it puts a 100% emphasis on looks. And while looks are important they are not 100% of what goes into attraction and dating. Sorry Incels. Its a bit of nuance. Those extra features, and ability to write about yourself and send communications to people, those things do work.

petrichordium · 2020-02-25T14:37:50+00:00

I think it’s a good analog for a certain slice of reality. But not all of it. Try to spatialize each one and think how you’d behave in its real world analog. Not only WHO you find there but how those ppl behave are influenced by the space.

Tinder is a crowded meat market club, one of those big obnoxious ones with a “VIP section” that’s just part of the floor they roped off for the bottle service tools.

Bumble is a yuppie networking happy hour where everyone is smiling and talking about their pedigree and goals, but after three drinks ppl start getting sloppy.

Hinge is like Bumble for crazier and even less pleasant people.

OkCupid is the art room at lunch in high school where the pretentious theater kid tries to fuck the moody art hoe.

Plenty of Fish is where you find prole cuties from the other side of the tracks. It’s like picking up girls at the mall or something.

So yeah: Tinder is reflective of reality in a sense, but do you LIVE at the club?

flamingoinghome · 2020-02-25T14:36:38+00:00

What's with the obsession with "purity", anyway? In real actual life, social judgements and niceties matter and must be accounted for.

Further, tinder--not OLD in general, but tinder--is a notorious hookup app, meaning most women don't make accounts, and most that do just glance at it. This is like saying there's some grand truth revealed by last-call hookups in a sleazy bar, when huge chunks of the population are never in a sleazy bar at last call.

Finally, why don't you people ever seen to mention the squillions of other dating apps and sites out there? They're not all tinder, ffs.

Mafiale · 2020-02-25T13:39:24+00:00

It shows that women are reluctant to use OLD and use it as a last resort/ side hussle. It shows that they would rather meet a man IRL.

It also shows that men have a myriad of attractive characteristics that cannot be shown with imagery and a small piece of text. Instead of moaning, men should seek ways of meeting women where they can display these strengths.

You would be surprised how many women would not have swiped right on their current boyfriends if they saw them on tindr. Their attraction grew from their initial IRL interaction.

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ChadThundagaCock · 2020-02-25T19:04:45+00:00

Tinder is gay

Pastelitomaracucho · 2020-02-25T19:24:41+00:00

It is.

I couldn't get myself to use it.

SherbertBacon · 2020-02-25T20:28:34+00:00

That wouldn't happen to be my comment, would it?

A lot of men want a lot of women, while a lot of women have a huge pool of men to choose out of as a consequence and pick the best.

On Tinder the pool is artificially inflated for women. The gender imbalance is 7:3 (or worse) male:female in many (most?) major cities. This creates very weird dynamics for men and women alike. Studies have also shown that gender imbalances affect sexual and dating behaviors.

That's all aside from the fact that Tinder attracts a very specific crowd of people: you're not getting a uniform sample of the general population by choosing "people willing to install and use Tinder."

Female choice can be studied on tinder to a great extend because the anonimity the app provides cuts the social necessity of being polite.

If we buy this (I don't) then we have to equally say that male behavior is well reflected too. I'm not really ready to throw myself in there with NiceGuys, Dick Pic Joe, the "hey" seagulls, Mr Infidelity Smith, and "Gentlemen who call women c*nts."

More likely app behavior is a unique phenomenon that brings out different behavior due to dehumanizing the person on the other end.

I agree that irl dating is different but I would argue that tinder is its purest form.

I don't know what "pure dating" would be exactly. Online or in person, we form judgments, we treat the other person as some kind of entity (or object), and we behave accordingly. Tinder, to me, reflects how humans engage with objects more than people, because, as you said "you also don't get socially judged by your peers."

SILENTSAM69 · 2020-02-26T03:38:14+00:00

So is Reddit.

rus9384 · 2020-02-26T09:17:31+00:00

Tinder sex ratio is not real at all. There were fewer men than women, not more.

Title	" The Tinderverse is a horrible analog for reality. "
Author	Mafiale
Upvotes	15
Comments	113
Date	February 25, 2020 11:23 AM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/f98uay/the_tinderverse_is_a_horrible_analog_for_reality/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/the-tinderverse-is-a-horrible-analog-for-reality.340092 https://theredarchive.com/post/340092

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