Do men who claim that "being a 'pickme' is a good way to get a man" even have any thought for anyone but themselves?

Throughawayman80808 · 2020-03-21T13:07:26+00:00

The problem comes from how wide the definition of pickme is. Sometimes it's women who are really insecure and constantly trying to please, and other times it's just anybody who doesn't hate and distrust all men.

NarniaFox · 2020-03-21T13:48:14+00:00

[deleted]

majani · 2020-03-21T13:39:44+00:00

Nobody uses "pick me" as an insult except other women. That tells you all you need to know about this derogatory term

Ufrixon · 2020-03-21T12:59:16+00:00

You sound as if your mind is made up. This is similar to how men are told - be nice. It does not work. Because different people have different preferences and you cannot generalise. Being a pick me is certainly a way to get a man. But the man it will get you will be of a specific type which you may not like.

Generally, normal guys stay away from girls who seem too insecure, who exhibit "pick me" behaviour and at least they avoid being in a relationship with such girls.

So such girls may end up getting used or taken advantage of. Is that what you are talking about?

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Barely-moral · 2020-03-21T13:10:19+00:00

Define the term.

When I think about a "pickme" I think about a woman that goes beyond what is expected from the women around her to please the man she is with or the man she wants to attract. Of course that changes from place to place and from culture to culture. (Men in the USA are screwed unless they leave.)

I don't believe they have 'pickme' girlfriends or wives themselves.

Why? I mean, sure some of "them" don't have any girlfriend let alone wife but for the rest of them... Why don't you believe them? Why be surprised.

I very much doubt it'd be a clear-cut way to get a man to love you and treat you well.

Assuming you are not abusive and you are fucking your man other behaviors are not likely to influence if a man treats you well or not. That is on the man you picked, not on your actions.

I've heard or seen plenty of complaints from women who clean the houses or rooms of men they're dating but wind up getting used.

It is on the man they picked, not on their actions.

I think overall it's just a way to be taken for granted. He'd probs think it's your 'normal' and want to suck more out of you.

Why be a "pick me" if it is not your normal? If you establish some standard of behavior as normal then it is on you. Don't establish something as normal if you don't want to keep it as the default.

Other than that, if you pick a man that takes people for granted then you suck at vetting. It is not hard to vet for gratitude.

Do men who claim that "being a 'pickme' is a good way to get a man" even have any thought for anyone but themselves?

I only think about myself, those who I care about and those who I have to care about at the moment. Unless a woman is my partner or a candidate/potential partner then I don't think about her.

Do they even know what a pickme is? Have they ever experienced having a pickme woman?

My definition is above. I have experienced those. Some are clearly faking it, those are timebombs, men should stay away. Others actually are being their normal selves. Those are rare, if you get one you don't let her go.

ILikeToArgueALot · 2020-03-21T16:22:24+00:00

Theres no such thing as a pickme girl. The FDS subreddit is so toxic with bullying other women that agree with men for once.

If you believe that, you're basically just bullying other women for liking things men do or *god forbid* agreeing with a man. Oh my god the HORROR OF A WOMAN AGREEING WITH A MAN!! SHE MUST BE A PICKME OMG!!

Men just see it as hey look a girl that likes my interests or doesn't or at least is kind enough to try and attempt to like my hobbies and spend time with me.

Technically every girl would be a pickme girl around THE RIGHT MAN. In other words every girl is not a pickme girl around guys shes not attracted too, and every single girl changes to a pickme around a guy she likes. In other words, no such thing as a pickme. It's just a girl flirting, showing interest and being...wait for it... nice to a man omg. Treating men like humans? omg what a pickmeisha.

sadomasochrist · 2020-03-22T00:44:18+00:00

Yes\No : It's not a thought that extends past getting said man. The statement is literal. Why would it need to expand past that.
Yes, we know one. My other half hates her, men adore her.

Pretty much constant with FDS\beta males etc. Basically anger towards women who embrace value systems men like and aren't able to compete with as well.

There's also two parts to this. One, is some women are like this. They naturally are aligned to male interests and enjoy the attention, it's a self fulfilling prophecy of sorts.

This is sort of like naturally fun and attractive Chads.

But then there's women who fake this, who regardless, want the attention.

These are more like guys who used to dress in Ed Hardy back when such a thing was fashionable.

To men, these women are hard to tell the difference between. For women, it's easy. But women will generally claim "all" of these girls are the 2nd variety.

Which is of course, hogwash. However, most likely are.

But regardless, both varieties seem to be happy and it seems like women unwilling\able to do this are jealous in the same way that beta males try to moralize Chad complain about all of his features like being uninhibited or not being a CPA etc.

DangZagnut · 2020-03-21T13:35:19+00:00

Do men who claim that "being a 'pickme' is a good way to get a man" even have any thought for anyone but themselves?

Do you have an example of this claim? Why ask a man how to get a man? You don't ask your mom how to pick up casuals.

The answer is going to be, "be what a man wants". That's the entire basis of TRP, "be what the woman wants."

Do they even know what a pickme is? Have they ever experienced having a pickme woman?

Many times. I'd say they've been the majority of my partners.

LillthOfBabylon · 2020-03-21T13:10:05+00:00

Two types of guys want a Pickmesha:

1

Those guys either want to Pump-and-dump those girls.

2

Those guys are desperate for love and want a girl just as desperate as they are.

As for guys saying this is the same has telling guys “Just be nice”. No it isnt. No one told men being nice gets you laid. Fools made an assumption and made an ass of themselves. Guys here have explicitly said they wanted a girl who caters to them (as long as she’s hot).

diffdedbed · 2020-03-21T13:38:56+00:00

It's a great way to get a man. It's being less selective though so it increases the chance of getting a bad one.

It's basically like being a average guy in dating.

goatismycopilot · 2020-03-21T13:57:52+00:00

I think being a "pickme" absolutely works for men it just does not work for women. There are plenty of men who will accept a "relationship" if that relationship involves minimal effort and getting all their needs met. Consider how often men here talk about wanting an easy going girl who does ABC does not cause drama is a chaste virgin who sucks dick at every meal and claps approvingly as he games with friends. I am not easy going I don't want to do all that it sounds like a job. That is kinda how it works the easy going people pleaser types gotta work 24/7 for all their relationship stuff. And I do know women like that they tend to be alien pod people with no interests or activities of their they just inherit the interests of their partner.

Pastelitomaracucho · 2020-03-21T13:12:15+00:00

What is a pickme woman?

Maybelowsmv · 2020-03-21T15:39:54+00:00

[deleted]

wtknight · 2020-03-21T15:59:42+00:00

Being a pickme as a woman is compromising too much. On the other hand, women should be willing to compromise to the male imperative somewhat, meaning providing consistent sex and making sure that he is at least happy without catering to his every whim. Many men do put in a lot of work ensuring that they satisfy their monogamous partner's hypergamy, and men choosing a lifestyle of monogamy rather than polygyny are sacrificing their male imperative somewhat.

Of course, women might say "Stay single!" to these men, then, but men could say the same thing to women who are constantly making hypergamous demands of their male partner, and many of them are starting to. The inability of both sexes to compromise can ruin the RMP.

I've never dated a pickme. I'm not alpha enough to attract one.

tickledpic · 2020-03-21T22:33:07+00:00

The HVM (in fds terms) is a male version of a 'pickme'. It's a man who is overly nice, is overly genourous, male feminist, etc... all in an effort to be picked.

Both genders want to be treated well and minimilize the chance of getting hurt. Being with a pickme gives you the most odds of not getting hurt.

But don't pretend as if FDS is really searching for a well rounded man. Because that man won't be putting himself into a pickme mindset.

tropicsGold · 2020-03-22T02:01:20+00:00

My understanding is that pickme is basically a woman who goes to great lengths to please their man. Sounds awesome to me and certainly something I would look for in a wife. And happily reciprocate. Why does this have to be so complicated. Is it weird to want to partner with someone who genuinely wants you to be happy. I mean only idiot leftists could think up this stuff. I think this is why leftist feminists have such trouble getting a man. If a woman thinks men are scum, men are very pleased to leave her behind and pick a woman who wants them. The new Leftist feminists are basically misogynists against men.

And btw it absolutely works. I have watched multiple men get chosen by a woman, showered with love, until the guy eventually married the woman. All of these marriages are still together and appear happy. I think more than maybe 10 years ago this was just called a happy marriage.

And btw why on earth would a man have less respect for such a woman? I mean I am sure it does not work every time but this would not lead to a man thinking less of a woman. Can you even imagine someone showering you with love and then thinking wow that person is a loser? That is not even a thing.

762Rifleman · 2020-03-22T02:03:17+00:00

What the fuck's a pickme and also what does it have to do with Indian girls?

Whisper · 2020-03-22T08:30:16+00:00

I never have any thought for anyone but myself under any circumstances.

But of course you have it backwards.

azngirl7689 · 2020-03-22T18:11:59+00:00

No of course not, they want a woman who does for them without asking him to do for her.

rus9384 · 2020-03-22T22:22:59+00:00

Granted, I don't believe they have 'pickme' girlfriends or wives themselves.

Except R_R.

Title	Do men who claim that "being a 'pickme' is a good way to get a man" even have any thought for anyone but themselves?
Author	Maybelowsmv
Upvotes	6
Comments	83
Date	March 21, 2020 12:50 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/fmeh7k/do_men_who_claim_that_being_a_pickme_is_a_good/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/do-men-who-claim-that-being-a-pickme-is-a-good-way.356895 https://theredarchive.com/post/356895

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