Boyfriend keeps panties and nudes of other girls, refuses to get rid of them and constantly talks about all the other women he’s fucked. GF wants to know how to discuss it without hurting his feelings.

SarcasmSlide · 2020-02-20T18:08:13+00:00

Original post, in case of deletion [it was deleted, and it didn’t take long]:

My boyfriend is a very sentimental/nostalgic guy. His phone still has a ton of old pictures of ex girlfriends/ one night stands from years back (including nudes). I know if we break up he’s keeping all my pictures. I live with him (I’m the only woman who has) and one day when I was cleaning our room I discovered a bunch of womens underwear. I asked him about this and he said they were from previous one night stands and ex girlfriends (he made it clear that these women gave it to him freely). He still has a bunch of things from his ex girlfriend (they were together for five years but she ran off with another man). Hes still very angry about it and says he’s going to give it back to her one day (even though I think he should throw it out). He’s had many girlfriends and one night stands (he has a high sex drive and a streak of failed relationships). I love him dearly, but he hates “jealous women”...how can I tell him I find this bizarre without stirring his anger or hurting his feelings?

Can we ship them all to Antarctica? /u/Emotional_World you deserve to be treated like a human being. This man is a pornsick, angry, entitled asshole who is not treating you like a human being. My heart hurts for you that you’re breaking yourself in half to try and be what he wants.

You. Should. Never. Put. Up. With. This.

I hope you’ll hang around our community a bit. We support you and believe in your worth, but you’ve gotta believe it, too.

EmergencyShit · 2020-02-20T18:33:46+00:00

He’s collecting them like a serial killer or rapist.

Only deranged men do stuff like this. He clearly doesn’t love or even like her.

She needs to RUN!

Ms_Diva_Muffin · 2020-02-20T18:32:52+00:00

Oh no!!!! And she calls him a "sentimental/nostalgic guy" WT actual F!!

He sounds like a psychopath! Who the fuck has a load of old panties from exes and one night stands?! Especially one night stands, why aren't these girls taking their knickers home ? :-D

2020-02-20T19:30:05+00:00

"My boyfriend sniffs his exes underwear and jacks off to pictures of his sister, am I being a insecure Karen goldigger Becky??"

Ugh, the socialization that women can't stand up for themselves or have preferences is getting worse. This subreddit needs to be shown to every single woman.

Edit: is her bfs name Joe Golberg?

persephones_torch · 2020-02-20T18:17:43+00:00

They are so gross. To him women are obviously just objects. Conquests to be won. She needs to dump this asshole and find a decent man.

delicateearthbabe · 2020-02-20T18:36:36+00:00

Sometimes I feel like I'm on some kind of drugs when reading these posts. Unreal experience.

possumeggs · 2020-02-20T18:08:10+00:00

This was just a distressing read. I mean...this guy sucks.

traditsh · 2020-02-20T19:35:44+00:00

Wow, dude. So many red flags.

Here's the post I made:

He hates jealous women? Well, what if you hate men who can't let go of their past? Why do his feelings automatically trump yours? Also, that's like saying that he hates angry women, or women who experience allergic reactions. Jealousy is a natural response to threatening stimuli, just like anger is a natural reaction. It's not fair to you to minimize your natural reactions and emotions. That is emotional manipulation.

He's presenting a standard where you don't get to communicate your very healthy, normal emotions, just so he doesn't have to get held accountable or experience that discomfort. He gets to shift it to you every time, "How dare you make me feel bad by telling me how I hurt you! You know how much I hate jealous women," now all of a sudden you're apologizing for holding him accountable for his shitty behavior. RED FLAG CITY. 🚩🚩🚩

Why are you walking on eggshells to avoid hurting his feelings? That's not healthy. If you don't feel like your relationship fosters a space where you can express your feelings with your partner without him blowing up at you, that is a red flag. How will you navigate marriage? Having children? If your life partner is incapable of having adult conversations about emotional topics without getting hurt, this is going to be a rough life for you.

This doesn't sound sentimental, it sounds like he's keeping trophies to feed his ego. Even if it is sentiment, why does the desire to hang on to that trump his desire to keep you comfortable and feeling valued in your relationship?

You share a home together, so you should have some say in what is allowed in that home. I would draw a firm line that things that don't belong to either of you, that are not used by either of you, have an expiration date. He has only so long to get those things back to his ex. After that date, those things go in the trash. Is he hoping for an opportunity of closure with his ex? It kind of sounds like he's holding on to an opportunity to rekindle something by holding onto her things.

pissed_af · 2020-02-20T18:49:01+00:00

Dang i hope op comes back to her senses "he's a different duck" nah sis,get out while you can

idiosyncrassy · 2020-02-20T19:09:22+00:00

He has a string of failed relationships because he's a self-obsessed douche why worry about hurting the feelings of someone who clearly gives zero shits about other people's?

ny-lady · 2020-02-21T00:02:26+00:00

Like he would be ok if she had a bunch of guys stuff...

You know if the shoe were on the other foot they would not have it!

Lakersrock111 · 2020-02-20T22:08:53+00:00

Jump dump his ass what she should do

nymphaetamine · 2020-02-21T14:37:39+00:00

He's SENTIMENTAL AND NOSTALGIC.

I'm screaming.

9penguin · 2020-02-21T19:46:13+00:00

Just leave, why do you have to care about his feelings, he's not human anymore, porn ruined his brain.

SarcasmSlide · 2020-02-20T22:25:37+00:00

[removed]

Comments